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advice needed

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So I need some advice in regards to my DD & SS.

Some background, before DD was born, I didn't really shop for SS. Of course if I seen something that made me think of him I'd buy it and I would notice when he needed new clothing and I'd let Dh know and it was up to him to initiate a visit to the kids dept. So basically I didn't go out of my way to buy things for him because well... I'm not his mom and he wasn't priority on my mind.

Bm lost her job

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So Bm has been at her job for almost a year I think, and from what I understand, this is the longest she's ever held a job. Well on Friday she let dh know she lost her job. We knew it was coming because ss was saying his mommy needed to win the lottery more (apparently she's always buying those scratch lottery tickets) because she doesn't have enough money because she lost he job.

MIL asks Dh something stupid!

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So i have a funny story for you ladies... As I've mentioned on here before, my MIL is also a Bm, a horrible one at that. I'd like to write that after years of being a Bm that she is better now but nope she is still bitter that her marriage to FIL ended and is still hates SMIL for no reason. Well, MIL had 3 kids (including my DH) w/ FIL and through the years after MUCH PAS'ing, Dh is really the only one who has a close relationship with his dad, SM and his half little sisters. Dh's sister is very standoffish with her stepmom and doesn't considering the girls FIL had w/ SMIL her sisters.

question for those in non-custodial situations regarding bdays/holidays

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For those of you that have spouses who are the non-custodial parent, how do you handle holiday gifts/birthday parties? Do you go all out for everything even though skid gets this w/ custodial parent? Bm is a POS but she does like to go all out for holidays/bdays so that she can show everyone how great of a mom she is because of what she buys him for xmas/bday etc. I guess I ask this because now w/ Dd (mine and dh's bio daughter) here I wonder if I'm supposed to encourage equal gifts/parties even though Ss will be getting double.

Bm's parents asked to see Dd at drop off last week

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So Bm went out of town last week and so instead of dropping Ss off with Bm, we dropped him with his nana. When we got there Bm's stepdad came out and waved a friendly wave to me as usual ( he's a really nice guy) and greeted Dh. Bm's mom then came out of the garage and waved to me also . Dh was out of the car and I was inside w/ Dd so I couldn't hear anything going on. Next thing I know Dh is opening the door to where Dd is and showing her to them. They fussed over her saying how cute she was and then we left. It was a little awkward but they were polite as they always are.

Do you feel like your spouse lose's interest in skid because of bm?

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Lose interest may be the wrong word... Dh seems to have given up when it comes to Ss. He of course exercises his visitation every weekend and when Ss is with us he does father/son things with him and what not but when it comes to asking bm for more time or discussing holidays it seems like lately Dh doesn't want to deal with it.

What do you do when Bm refuses to communicate in written form?

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Lately dh will text Bm and she won't respond but will call over and over right after he sends the message. Last week when he text her asking her when where he was meeting her to drop ss off she called him and he needed to know so he just answered and she told him that her text is "broken" and he needed to talk to her on the phone. Bm has an iPhone (we know this because the text messages show she's using an iPhone) and ss is always talking about how he plays on her phone so I doubt her text is broken.

Do any of your bms seem like they want something to be wrong with skid?

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One thing I've noticed about Bm is that she is always so quick to try to label Ss with some issues/problem. The first time I seen this was about a year and a half ago when she said she thinks he's ADD/ADHD and that she wants him on medication. Dh fought her on this one and said he didn't think that was necessary. I have a few cousins who are ADD/ADHD and I can tell you Ss is not ADD, she didn't even take him to a doctor, she just kept saying he was "too hyper and can't pay attention" and needed to get on medication. Eventually after about a month she stopped talking about it.

Why is it that people think women shouldn't have to pay child support?

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So I've seen in the news lately that that guy Eddie Cibiran, the guy married to Leann Rimes is going after his ex for child support and everyone seems to be bothered by it because LeAnn Rimes is worth 20 million... and the problem is? Everyone keeps saying a man shouldn't go after his ex for child support because she's a woman... soooo just because she's a woman that means Leann rimes should support her kids? This is so stupid. If it were the other way around I'm sure his ex would be going after him for child support and no one would say anything.

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