LOL - Whining
So I had posted a blog about SS9 being whiney mostly because BM allows it and treats him like a 3 year old.
Well like clockwork he fell and fractured his arm (he has yet to make it a year without breaking a bone). He stayed home from school and we were going to pick him up that evening for our Thursday night visit. BM "warned" us that SS had been very grumpy and whiney (kill me now please) due to his arm.
I was bracing myself for when we picked them up....from the moment we picked them up to the moment we dropped them off....SS9 was cheerful happy and in an all around great mood. He never pouted, whined, or cried once the whole time we had them.
It made me laugh and made me realize even more that he is whiney and pouty around BM because she BABIES HIM! He knew we wouldn't put up with his crap and acted totally fine the whole evening. I am sure that once he got home he went back to acting like a cry baby for mommy lol.
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I used to see the same thing
I used to see the same thing with my SD.
When SD was 11, BM *DELIBERATELY* scheduled a tonsillectomy two days before we were to pick her up to go to another state to Universal Studios/Busch Gardens. Why? Because she "didn't want to take off work." to care for her kid.
When we picked up SD11, BM went nuts telling ME (the CFBC, never-changed-a-diaper, female) instead of the child's FATHER, that SD11 was IN SO MUCH PAIN!! and wouldn't wait a second past the minimum time for the maximum dose of codeine-based pain meds. BM had had to call the doctor and BEG for a refill already!!
Right.
When we got to MIL's house (where we were forced to stay for a week - and waste the hotel - due to the surgery followup) DH and I sat SD11 down and explained about drug dependence and going off pain meds cold turkey, and there was no way in hell the doctors would give us more, so why don't you try a half dose in the morning and if it gets really bad we'll give you more?
Other than a slight meltdown at a restaurant while running errands (I suspect it's what SD11 would have had to do to even GET BM's attention, let alone concern) SD11 was completely her normal happy self. We ended up throwing out half of that bottle of codeine medicine - SD11 was weaned off it within two days without complaint. A week later, she was screaming her head off on the roller coasters, happily.
These BMs don't want the skids to grow up. They love the dependence and the hero worship they get. In our case SD-almost-17 is frantic to get out from under BM's smothering thumb - but then, SD16 was replaced as the baby when she was 8, and her brother's sperm donor ran like hell the minute BM told him she was knocked up. So BM's second kid is ALL HERS. He's also almost 9, outweighs me, plays Call of Duty incessantly, is failing school, and is bullied. How's that working out for you, BM?