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DH's old wedding ring with BM

asheeha's picture

He STILL has it...ugh.

I just don't like it. I know there are a lot worse out there. But it's in his truck right now. We went around to get it appraised and he just hasn't taken it out of his pick up and I see it flashing at me every now and then.

I want to throw it out the window!

If he's going to keep it for the kids, then fine, put it in a box I don't have to see.

If he's going to sell it then DO IT ALREADY! It's been in the truck a year!

What did your DH do with his old wedding ring or you do with yours?

How do I get it out of my house?...or truck...

I'm swamped at work today so I can't blog much but I'm eager to hear what ya'll have to say!

xo

Comments

PrincessFiona's picture

They have been known to do that........it's what happened at my house too. Somethings are just unexplainable ! LOL

Unfreakingreal's picture

That would PISS me off. My Dh was never married to BM so I don't have to deal with that. I took mine and had them reset. I gave one of my wedding bands to my oldest son for his GF when they get married. The other is in the safe.

imjustthemaid's picture

Ugh I wouldn't like that. I have asked DH where his is but it was so long ago I know he does not have it. I had my old engagement ring from my exh. DH was very upset when he realized I still had it. Turns out my cousin wanted to ask his girlfriend to marry him and didn't have the money for a nice ring. I had it appraised for him and the jewelry store mailed it to him so he took the diamond and just got a new setting. I am very close with his mother so I gave it to him for free, he just paid for it to be appraised.

BSgoinon's picture

I have no idea what DH did with his ring. Last I saw it, it was in a box in the garage, but all of those boxes are gone now. I assume he tossed it. It would bother me too having it there, staring me in the face all of the time. Although DH never wore his even when they were married (all 6 months of it).

DH and I pawned my old wedding ring and went to Disneyland Wink we didn't even really need the money, it just seemed like the right thing to do. hee hee

BSgoinon's picture

Ha... I seriously stopped for a minute after I read that line >>>i'm hoping he dies and that's what ends our marriage.

Too funny.

Anywho78's picture

After having dated my SO for about 6 months, I had to go get his keys for him & low & behold...there it was, on his key ring. I told him how uncomfortable it made me....I actually got my SO a nice little wooden box & told him "Look babe, you can put all of your little private things in there"...while looking directly at the ring Wink About a year later, he sold it for it's value in gold & we went out for a nice dinner.

I would tell him that you don't like seeing it so until he gets rid of it (whether he sells it or gives it to the SKids) it should be put away, in a box, so that you aren't forced to witness yet another testament of their "love".

PrincessFiona's picture

My DH had his on his keyring for a while too - 2 of them since he's been married twice before - until I asked him if he was saving them as souveniers. So he removed them and they were tucked away out of sight. Then one day they magically disappeared. Smile

what's with men????? why carry a reminder of that around with you everyday?

IfearImgoinnutz's picture

OT--Sorry, Flabby, I told this joke to my BD9 this morn:

Why did the turtle cross the road?
It was stapled to the chicken.

My DH Loled, BD9 goes "umm, I don't get it." hahahahahahaha I had to explain it to her. I almost ran off the road laughing.

IfearImgoinnutz's picture

I have no clue what DH did w/his old wedding band nor do I care. He moved alot after they split and pretty much moved in w/me with nothing so who knows. lol

When I left Exh I wasnt wearing my eng ring, my kids said he sold it and bought an xbox. hahahahaha I sold my old wedding band and used the money to get my new wedding set sized.

stormabruin's picture

BM pawned DH's ring before she ever left. He was without one for the last almost 1 1/2 years they were together.

Last I knew my exH still had his from our marriage in the drawer in his bedside table. His then-gf was pissed about it & I told him she had every right to be. We don't have kids together, so I know he wasn't keeping it for that reason.

I told him I sold my set to pay bills & he was honestly beside himself over it.

If I were you, I'd take it out of the truck & put it away. If he wants to sell it, he can put it in the truck long enough to get to wherever he's going to sell it.

He's being disrespectful keeping it on display in front of you all the time.

BSgoinon's picture

Funny BM sold the camper shell to DH's truck. Just the shell. He was gone a total of a week. He was pissed.

BSgoinon's picture

THAT's CLASSY. Is it SOOO hard to just WORK for money?? I swear, this chick would sell a child if it was left at her house for more than 5 minutes.

Mom2's picture

BM4 sold everything he had. She told him on the phone that she hopes that he “crashes and burns” He packed a bag with only a few changes of clothes. She sold EVERYTHING. Then when she ran out of his stuff to get $$ she sold the kids’ stuff. Everything, furniture, clothes. It was so bad that her father had to buy back all the clothes that MIL and FIL bought the SK’s for Christmas. Guess where the $$ went… hard core drugs for her and her BF. Now it her husband, that BM would say “has been the only father that the kids have known”.

Today.. She lives off the Government....

purpledaisies's picture

My dh wasn't wearing a ring when he was married to yuck, he lost years before and never replaced it. He said that he knew the marriage was over but he stuck around for the kids for a while and when that didn't work (the night she hit him over 30 times while he had their youngest in his arms)he left.

However I would have already tossed that sucker and plead the 5th! i have done that with a few things already. }:)

Aislinn81's picture

Ex threw mine out the window of a moving car one day when he was convinced I was cheating (in reality he was the one cheating, oh well). The ring he gave me as "replacement" was salvaged from the depths of his apartment after he died by my ex-bil and I have it in my foot locker in a box for my BD when she is of age.

DH's used to sit in a this box he has in the bathroom with a glass door for display. It's like a three drawered jewerly box on one side, and a door with three shelves on the other. It was displayed there. Once I moved in, I told him it made me uncomfortable. He said it was something he wanted to keep for the kids and he really liked the ring and thought that he might wear it again when we got married. Needless to say, I laughed him out of the room, told him never in a thousand years would he be wearing that piece of tin if WE got married and he better put in a box somewhere or it would mysteriously vanish. He got the hint. Smile

Superstopmommy's picture

I kept the jewelry my ex gave me and had the stones reset into jewelry for my Bio children when the graduated from High School. They helped to pick out the setting and we picked the stone that would fit. The picked apart remnants are sitting in my jewelry box waiting for my granddaughter someday.

herewegoagain's picture

Ok, you pick up the ring, you get in your car, you go anywhere you want and sell it. Or really, if it's gold, since it's worth so much, if you don't need the money, melt it into something else...period. When he asks what happened to it, just say "oh, my! the ring is gone? how could you have lost it!?!" :sick:

ThatGirl's picture

I still have mine, figured I'd have them reset someday or something. I wouldn't feel right about giving rings from a failed marriage to my sons. Bad juju and all that. More than likely, they'll just sit in a box until the end of time.

SO still has his. It doesn't bother me. I think he tried selling it once, but it wasn't worth anything. It's rolling around in his nightstand or junk drawer, we're not really sure as we haven't seen it in a while.

asheeha's picture

it's platinum! he really want's to get as much out of it as he can. if we sell it to a jeweler it will only be worth scrap and it's about $200. to buy it new is about $1500+...he just can't stomach selling it for that cheap.

i don't think he's TRYING to be disrespectful...i believe it holds no sentimental value to him whatsoever so he doesn't think about it. it's floating around with bolts/screws/spare change...stuff like that.

he did mention reusing it when we were talking about getting married.

we couldn't afford another platinum set and he liked the idea. i was HORRIFIED at the suggestion. needless to say, THAT didn't happen. it pisses me off just remembering it!

i really like the idea of throwing it out...the devil on my shoulder is whispering to me.

the angel is saying keep it and make little rings for the girls when they turn 16 with a diamond in them.

i'm going to be more blunt with him. i've told him i don't like it...but sometimes i have to get snippy with him before he acts.

i'll ask him if he wants to put the money into it to get it polished and looking top notch to sell on a resale site. if not then i'll put it in a box and have him tuck it away at his parents. or he might find it's being tossed out the window! ha ha ha

any good resale sites you can recommend?

i have thoroughly ENJOYED reading all your responses. it has been HIGHLY entertaining. ya'll are the best!

asheeha's picture

oh...and i CAN NOT imagine him carrying it around on his key chain. i'd go ape shit on him! it's appalling that two of you have had to deal with it!

Anywho78's picture

Oh I didn't "deal with it" for long...it was less than a week from when I saw it to when it was "boxed up" Biggrin

Thank you for the sympathy though!

stormabruin's picture

Me & my exh paid just under $4k for my first set & I sold it for $300. It hurt my gut to realize that was the highest offer, but it paid a couple of bills & it was good for my soul to be rid of it. It also didn't end up floating around the house or car for my Dh to have to find or look at.

I would think it'd be worth more to him as $200 cash than it is as a reminder of a marriage failed floating around with screws & spare change for his wife to have to look at.

I could see him wanting to keep it for a child, but with more than one child, how would he determine which one to give it to? Also, it seems if he's looking to sell it, the sentiment for the kids isn't really there anyway.

I'd go for the $200 & be done with it.

asheeha's picture

there's something really romantic in it tho. i have to teach dh romance...he's trying, so i'll give him that. Smile

i like that he's practical and really good with money...i'm the one with too much abandon! lol

asheeha's picture

it's not a deal breaker or a HUGE awful pain. pics of him and bm together on his computer...yeah...that had to be deleted. this, i know he's practical beyond belief...so it really is just about the money.

if i felt for one second it was a way for him to keep a piece of her i'd go crazy. i do something similar to you...when i shut down, he knows something is very very wrong. if i'm not talking about the problem...it's really bad.

j-dog's picture

My DH's wedding ring from BM....when I moved in here (well over two years after their divorce was final) and was (uncomfortably) trying to get settled in, in THEIR old house, DH cheerfully announced that he'd "mostly" cleaned out the nightstand on what was to be my side of our bed. There, the top drawer, along with some other clutter, ball point pens, rubber bands, etc., was his wedding ring from BM.
A fit of great hissiness was thrown. Not sure where it is now. Don't care...

Lalena75's picture

I had my exH's ring when the divorce was final the next valentines day I returned it told him happy pawning day (its strangely on his keyring as of yesterday when I ran into him at the store) mine are tucked away to be remade into a necklace of my daughters initals with the stones for her high school graduation. I wouldn't want anyone to wear them as wedding rings they came from a pawn shop and are cursed as far as I'm concerned. My SO and BM never had rings they couldn't afford them and when he could he didn't get them cause she kept kicking him out (9 years of marriage they lived together only a total of 3)