SO letting SS get away with things like oh i dont know not going to school.
It has been a while, ive been to the site periodically just never logged in with my account.
SS stb 18 in february has come to live with us and by that I mean- me, SO, and my 2 DDs (we have 1 DD together) and my parents...thats right SS is living with his Step Grandparents(but they dont know him well to call them that) so we can save for a home- (yes i know its pathetic living back at home, SO was fired and has been gainfully employed again- we had to leave our rental as our landlord did not want a baby in the house). SS is living with us because BM cant deal with SS. SS does have a ghetto like mouth, generally he is good, however, he lacks motivation and has not been attending school regularly since he was 13, he is supposed to be in grade 12 but he is in grade 10...
SS wasnt going to school with BM- so why would SO think SS was going to go to school with him?
SS hasnt been to school in the last 2 days- a few weeks ago SO was away for work and let SS take a day off because he helped me watch the kids for a few days, while i worked in the evenings and let him take a day off because it was a half day- so school doesnt matter?
I realize SO is constantly busy- and i shouldnt bust his chops- but my god- what he lets him get away with he doesnt clean up after himself but complains the rooms a mess, doesnt put dishes away, doesnt fold his laundry(SO Folds his laundry), leaves full cans of pop left or doesnt put them away, in the last 48 hrs hes been doing nothing but watching movies and SO is letting him...this kids has not been to school in the last 4 years...the irony is my DD9 who yes can be a brat- he barks at yells at- even when she wouldnt get out of the bed in the morning right away like most kids do lol... but with his Son he does this "oh deary wake up now" soft spoken way of getting him up, he never yells, even my DD has asked me why he does it to her and not him?
I spoke with a friend about my situation and she is saying put him back on BM, she created this mess, i was telling her the cash we divied out and she said hes already eaten up past your CS, and hes going to put a wedge between me and my SO...I guess what im most disappointed in is SO letting his Son get away with stuff, he goes to the city to see his gf every weekend- it was a long weekend SS stayed up late but cant go to school...im getting annoyed as i can see him living with us for a while and not doing anything for several years and constantly hitting us up for cash- yes i live at home my parents dont have much money, so i gave my dad my car and pay insurance so we are paying $1000/month to stay at my parents and we buy all the groceries...my parents are splitting up as well my mom found out my dad has a gambling problem and has been seeing hookers that she tracked thru the gps she installed on my car, to say our lives are fucked is an understatement...
Any suggestions on how to get SS motivated to go to school or how to get SO to put his balls back on- with my daughter he is really nasty at times...with his son, hes copacetic...thanks for listening.
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Your husband is a horrible
Your husband is a horrible father and you are not responsibile for raising your sloth of a SS. Just make sure he moves out at 18 because it doesn't sound like he's going to college any time soon.
Thank you- im not sure if i
Thank you- im not sure if i would say he is horrible but he certainly needs to get his priorties straight and stop babying his son- his son was spoiled by the BM...she kicked him out because he punched a hole in the wall and got into a fight with his sister...i will agree it is horrible he is letting him stay home, i borrowed the advice on the adult sc forum and have stopped making lunch and other things, as i do all the cooking, today they can do it themselves...SS is also giving me the evil eye out of nowhere and randomly one day told me, "in all honesty i couldnt stand to date someone like you"- still never told SO about that, but probably wont.
What a jerk of a "kid". How
What a jerk of a "kid". How he manages to have a girlfriend is beyond me. I don't understand how your husband treats SS like a snowflake and is harder on your daughter. The 9 year old isn't even his kid, correct?
Yeah, im not sure where or
Yeah, im not sure where or why the evil thing started happening yesterday i pointed to SS sleeping on the bed as it was past 9am, maybe he took offense when i asked why he wasnt in school as for the other comment yeah- it bothers me a bit, but i think if he said it a few years ago id be more devastated, as my friend pointed out,for a kid thats been kicked out he doesnt seem appreciative- she generally has a negative way of viewing things at time, but is very realistic as reality someties bites- his mother told him to go to a shelter, instead he had to call his dad, without asking me, we just went to pick his son up from the city and hes lived with us since...and yes, my 9 year old is not his...i just worked 30 hours in the last 3 days have class tonight and am getting my 2nd degree online, so kind of done with BS evil eyes and me saying to him, "i hope you feel better" yesterday with him giving me that evil look and ignoring me, i have a low tolerance his mom is a bitch i want her to take him back we will pay the 1200$ i just want peace.
Thank you, I actually didnt
Thank you, I actually didnt sign up for this- we were at walmart SO gets a call with SS saying his mom kicked him out SO immediately responded with i have to pick up my son, i think he is trying to be a hero instead of a dad, as the kids were PAS apparently the mom put him in a mental hospital for a month when he was 13 because he refused to go to school, they thought he was depressed- SS just told SO this- lots of issues with these people and im kind of done for literally paying for them- in every sense of the way, bm wanted them i want her to take him back but SO is too stubborn to do anything and too busy to parent, he needs to rechange his priorties so far, i have disengaged from ss- i dont go into the room SO and SS share, im working over time this week but as long as SS around i want to work but that means taking away from my other kids...its tough, how do i unsign up for this? i would like suggestions how to say, if things dont improve SS has to go.
He hasn't gone to school
He hasn't gone to school since he was 14? I'm surprised the school wasn't busting down BM's door. Did she tell them that he moved or enrolled in another school?
My view would be that SS has a choice of jobs - he can either choose to go to school as his job or he can choose to get a real job. Staying at home and watching movies is not one of the choices. If he doesn't like those choices, he can choose to go back to live with BM, but especially since he's living at your parents' house, he should be forced to make a choice.
CPS is useless. Staffed
CPS is useless. Staffed mostly by a bunch of man-hating psycho BMs. The Girhippo was a CPS supervisor which should tell you everything you need to know about CPS.
He does know if he doesn't go
He does know if he doesn't go to school... then SO can get in huge trouble with the government right? It's considered a form of neglect parents can get in trouble for if they don't make the kids go.
In most states compulsory
In most states compulsory education ends at 16. Unless they live in one of the few states where it is longer, the state won’t care.
The chances of SS graduating from a regular high school are very small. DH needs to look into alternate programs if he wants SS to get a diploma.
Tell your husband SS has to
Tell your husband SS has to go back to BM, sorry it's not your parents responsibility to house this teen.
If Dh does not like it he can find a trailer for him and SS...
I will never get it, why adults move back in with their parents, with their whole families, dogs, cats, fish and then on top of it all step kids as well.. it's just not on...
I can understand if you moved to your parents with your 2 daughters temporarily, get a job, get a cheap place and move out,