Boyfriends daughter randomly mad at me?
So I’m not technically a SM but I live with my bf who has a 5yr old daughter. Normally her and I are super close. Last night she was sitting in my lap, giving me hugs and kisses, telling me she loves me and calling me mom. This morning I was the devil. I picked out her clothes and she said she didn’t like them. I went to do her hair and she said I’m not allowed to do it anymore because I’m not as good as her mom. She even asked her dad to do it instead of me and he sucks at doing hair. Then she was being super disrespectful and cried when her dad left. I asked her if I’d done something to make her upset and she said she was sorry and that she was just tired. I’m really confused as to what I did. I wonder if her BM was bad talking me because last time we were all together she was being more affectionate towards me than her. But she was acting fine yesterday. Maybe I’m overreacting but it makes me sad. Anyone have thoughts? Is this fairly normal when you’re not the BM?
Its normal - even if you are
Its normal - even if you are the BM... Kids -especially toddlers - say horrible things at any time for no reason. I dont think they mean it or even remember what they say a few hours later. It hurts you because you do remember... I remember when my son told me not to make dinner "because Daddy makes it better". Yeah, turns out Daddy was happy to feed our son chocolate with his broccoli.
It may seem worse in your case because you are the stepmom and the kid is between two households. You assume it is something to do with a step situation. I know it is hard, but please dont take it personally. Young kids are going to say strange things. As long as you care for her, are consistent in how you treat her (hopefully with love and care) it wont be an issue where you need to look at yourself as being at fault.
You are over reacting and yes
You are over reacting and yes BM was PASing this kid. Quit worrying about what a 5yo thinks. They can't stay straight for more than a minute or two anyway. Parent. Don't wuss out over a 5yo being a 5yo.
As for BM... nail her ass to the wall for her toxic crap. Your BF needs to make sure to have your back with his dauther and for sure give his X clarity that her toxic PASing crap stops now or she will suffer the fullest consequences he can bring to bear.
IMHO of course.
Good luck.