Well I leave the parenting to their dad but he allows them one hour a day for their games. Its more then I would allow them if they were mine only bc they are failing in school. They were passing school when they lived with us but their BM allows them games as much as they please. Its her way of keeping them out of her hair.

I think my ss plays his Xbox/Xbox live way too much. He decided to play that instead of studying for his finals in Dec. and his grades showed it.
If he gets grounded from his Xbox and ipod, he doesn't know what to do with himself so he sleeps!!!
I think it's sad that he can't do anything without electronics!!

My SS15 plays for HOURS at a time. Even though the amount of time he spends on the console does concern me... my bigger issue is the type of games he plays and how completely disconnected from reality he becomes there.
He already has some personality traits that raise serious red flags and the type of violent and gun/weapon focussed games are simply not healthy in my opinion. At least not for someone of his personality type.
His dad agrees. But as he has them so infrequently he doesn't want to be the bad guy when they're here. Catch twenty two. If they lived with us we could set real limits. The boys are not about to agree to that because he has almost complete autonomy at BM's... why would you trade that for rules and discipline at Dads?
His mum's solution to problem is that he must wear headphones if he plays after midnight, so she can get a good nights sleep!!!! Did I mention that he's FIFTEEN!!!! And spends school holidays with us so most of this past midnight murderous rampaging is happening on school nights.

My ds13 can play Xbox for hours. He also has an online computer game he plays with dh. However, he has a 4.0. Has a handful of really good friends and lots of acquaintances. He also loves to read. He's a nerd what can I say? I don't limit his gaming and not really have a reason to unless grades drop, attitude turns south, or we start having behavior issues.

Oh, and he plays with his friends and I will hear high talking and socializing the whole time.

People who study human bahavoir are very concerned about the lack of interpersonal connections - face to face. How this will turn out remains to be seen.

I have a cousin who raised her 5 children in the 60's and 70's with one small TV in the home and it was turned on only for the evening news and special programs like the moon landing. Literally that special. PBS shows and the like.

All 5 are amazingly sucessful in their lives, marriages, careers and child raising. It's a very impressive outcome. I have to say I can't see a downside to not letting a kid near an electronic device until they're out of high school other than school work or research.

But - if they go outside and play who is out there? They're all inside playing video games. As a nation we're going to pay by losing our cutting edge in the world competition.

If they're getting good grades, are involved in sports at school, etc.? I wouldn't sweat it too much.

But, one thing you could consider would be to find some sort of club team or off-season training for the sport(s) they participate in. My daughter's sport is in the fall, but she plays year 'round with one team or another. (She has/had her main club team, but was always subbing for teams that needed someone to fill in.) That might make the screen time more palatable...

I have the same thing with SS11. He could literally play the Xbox all day/night. DH loves gaming as well so he doesn't mind as much but I don't allow the all day thing. This summer SS11 says all he wants to do is game and not do any sports. This is bothering me because he always wants to play soccer but his BM won't sign him up to play (we live 7 hours away). I found a soccer camp for him to go to this summer but he told us he doesn't want to go and he would rather "game" all summer! Not happening!

We are extremists at our house and don't have any game consoles. We barely allow any screen time on the computer or TV. My skids are 12 and 7. They have unlimited screen time at their mother's and even though they ask continuously while they are with us if they can watch TV or play on the computer, they know how we feel about it so they don't press us too terribly. They have a bit of a hard time figuring out how to play. They too have very few friends (he has one friend and she has NONE) nor do they really know how to act socially. We feel that their time with us is to learn social skills so we try to keep them connected to us and others during our time. At their mom's, they are on remote control. Both are passing but struggle with behavior issues at school. And neither have any kind of other interests/extra curricular activities. It's like they aren't completely present in the real world except for maybe 30% of the time. It is a concern.

We have two bio kids and we won't allow them much time on screens either (they are too young now to really know). Some friends of ours have a rule that the family use ZERO electronics during the week and no limit on weekends. However, the weekend comes and they are usually busy with other things. Their kids are incredible - mannerly, confident, creative, fit, gracious, have lots of friends, etc. Anyway, I like their idea of no screens during the week - makes it very easy to control.

okay, my boys are 8,10,15. One older son is 22, just finished college and lives away from home. He was a video game addict and we did not limit him as much..but we learned with the other kids what we needed to do. The 15 year old is my stepson. We allow them to play video game systems/computer games only holidays,Fri-Sunday during the school year. Summers are more open and flexible. I know my stepson sneaks and plays games on his phone which has no internet access. My husband does not mind so much about that but I don't agree. Anyways, We don't believe in having to have the latest games nor several systems in the house. We have WII, PlayStation 2, DS and they take turns with max one hour play time, if someone else wants to play. They play well together on the systems. We use the systems as rewards at the end of the week. We actually don't have time for them anyways during the week. So, they don't ask about it anymore, they just follow the rules. I put the boys in an activity at least once per year (sports) right now the younger two are doing Tae kwon do daily after school. The 15 yr old stays after school to do a weight lifting program. Electronics can be addictive and an easy way of entertainment but as parents I think we have to limit it. Parents have to agree on what to limit and how. I hope this helps. It works for us. By the way, my kids are honor roll students and my oldest is a recent graduate of UCA Berkeley with honors

I have an 8 and a 10 year old. From what I've seen and done. You have to be the one that makes them go outside and play. Not by force, but start a project with them or have their dad do it with them, This is when you need to use the power of manipulation, of course no child or teen will ever do something they dont want to or even something that is good for them. It is your job and your DHs jobs to find them things to do. I agree sitting in the house is VERY unhealthy I was raised old school and we always had to go out to play we actually enjoyed it more than playing games. Today's kids worry me. Its all about electronics they wouldnt know how to survive without them. I put my SKs in activities even if they dont want to be in them. At first they hate it and then they come to love it. It takes them away from all of the xbox,ps3/psp/3ds and Ipads. its hard but when is anything good for you easy!!...LOL good luck and let me know how it works for you