This is the thing that gets me...
Forums:
When DH's expect you to treat the skid(s) like your own when things are going good, but then when the skid needs a talking-to it's a different story.
When my BD says or does something my DH thinks deserves some attention, he gives it to her and I let him. I don't jump in and try to stop him from parenting my child.
Thank God Dh wasn't home when I told SD how me, BD, and our home were going to be treated. DH would have stopped me the second the first tear was shed, cuddled her, and petted her hair. And then in front of the kid, "can I speak to you?" (to me) and then tell me I'm too hard on her cause SD's sensitive and then bring up incomparable comparisons between his daughters behavior and my daughters behavior.
What I don't get is WHY some
What I don't get is WHY some SPs allow this.
If you can't correct his kid, why allow him to correct yours?
Men only do what women allow them to get away with.
If, for example, my BD leaves
If, for example, my BD leaves her jacket in the living room and DH sees it first, he may tell my daughter to hang it up in her room. If I tell SD the same thing, she's like, "Uht, dirty look" and DH is like, "As if BD never leaves her jacket in the living room"
Did I SAY BD NEVER leaves her jacket? Hell no, I didnt.
What I'm saying is that if DH makes a reasonable request, I allow it. If I make a reasonable request, I'm picking on SD. Total double standard.
incomparable comparisons
incomparable comparisons between his daughters behavior and my daughters behavior.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^this is the one thing that when my DH does drives me absolutly batty, why do they feel the need to attack our kids because they fucked up their own?
My children are very different from DH.
First and foremost my ex husband and I did not involve our very small children at the time in our divorce which DH and his ex did. Shame on them for using their kids as pawns.
My ex and I did not confide in our small children in reference to our adult feelings for our soon to be ex spouse. Shame in them for involving their children in adult feelings.
My ex and I did not fight or keep our keeps from each other. Shame in DH and his ex for doing so.
My ex and I did not make our children our replacement spouses, friends or buddies. We didnt indulge the little girl feel sorry for me routine my parents are divorced. My DH and his ex wife did. Shame on them.
So comparing my children to his little screwed up diseasters? Yeah, not quite the same children
incomparable comparisons
incomparable comparisons between his daughters behavior and my daughters behavior.
I remember my DH trying to compare my son choosing to style his hair in a mohawk before going to school (HS) versus his daughter getting pregnant and having a baby at 16 and then not allowing him to see the grandchild for over a year (at that time). He tried to say that both were a result of bad parenting. I was like :jawdrop:
Lavender - I could've written
Lavender - I could've written this verbatim. Other than SD7 being 14 and already a mini BM, it's my situation totally.
DH was petrified of hurting his daughter's feelings or pissing her off and he treated her as if she'd shatter into a million pieces.
My DD is also 15 and a joy to be around. DH and DD get along GREAT and she can also be a tad mouthy at times but we keep her in check. She's not disrespectful in the slightest and DH LOVES that about her.