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Just for fun: crappiest gift from adult skid?

2Tired4Drama's picture

I saw this topic briefly mentioned in another thread, so thought it might be fun if we can get a list going of the crappiest gift you've ever gotten from an adult skid.

We've all given and received gifts that weren't exactly on target but they were well intentioned.

When I say crappiest, I mean one that was intentionally thoughtless and perhaps even nasty - like something clearly used. Who wants to start??!! Blum 3

hereiam's picture

I guess I can't play because I have never received anything from either of my husband's adult daughters. But neither has my husband.

dontcallmestepmom's picture

Same here. DH mailed them their gift cards today (I do not think they deserve anything, but pick my battles), but one thing we agreed on is capping gift amounts, and he actually did $50 each. With me out of work, it was really what we could afford now. I am not into Christmas presents/spending tons of cash anyway. 2 of his kids have already asked (via email bc they don't talk to DH) for a combo of $3K worth of stuff, so I am sure they will not react favorably to the gift card amount. They are that selfish and entitled.

godess-clueless's picture

wow, You mean to say step kids give gifts? Been married 14 years now. I've never seen any. In fact I have never been offered a glass of water when I did used to go to their homes. Usually to pick up their children or drop off money they needed to borrow. Gifts from the steps. Now that's funny.

2Tired4Drama's picture

"Gifts from the steps. Now that's funny."

You know, I didn't even think of that before I posted. It will be interestng to see how many others say the same thing ... gifts are unheard of!

sandye21's picture

Most years I received nothing. But a couple of years ago when SD spent a few days before Christmas with us I got a good tongue lashing from both she and her husband because I asked if they would speak up instead of constantly having muffled, sideline conversations while we were in the same room. Then I was handed a gift bag (from my wrapping stash) with an item of outdated food and a minute jar of jam SD had made. It was handed to me like I should be honored. Oh, I forgot to mention I DID rate one cookie after they used my kitchen to make platters of them for their friends. One present I am giving to myself on Christmas Day is to not waste a single second thinking of them.

2Tired4Drama's picture

Nothing like a case of food poisoning from spoiled food to show how much you cherish someone, huh?

sandye21's picture

I didn't eat any of the 'treats' - or anything else I got from them. I had an earlier experience when I caught SD's husband spitting in my tea.

Krispey Kreme's picture

If I saw that, I'd serve SD and her husband up something to top that the next chance I got. It wouldn't be spit.

Krispey Kreme's picture

With dog food lasagna as the main course. And lemonaid like in "The Color Purple". Whoopie played a step-mom with an awful DH and crappy skids. Acutally I saw "The Help" and the nasty girl with the snotty attitude who ate the pie reminded me of my SD41. Pretty, but vile.

hismineandours's picture

My ss14 is not an adult so techically not an answer to your question. But he has never bought me a gift. Even though I've known and helped raise him since age 1. Last year, he took 300.00 (from dh's disability payments to mil to raise ss)and spent it on bm and her family. He didnt even buy us a card, make us a card, give us a penny-although he did stop by for 10 minutes on xmas day to pick up his 200.00 worth of gifts.

But one time he did make me a special gift. He was about 9 I believe-he had lived in our home for 8 years and I was his primary caregiver. He had made a bell out of clay in art and presented it to me all wrapped up. I opened this nice clay bell to see written on the side of it.... BM + DH. BM and dh had been divorced before ss even turned 1. No indication ever that they were getting back together. Both bm and dh in long term relationships with others.

forgotten wife's picture

Ok, I'll play. My SS27 and SS25 "went together" on a $6 jar lid opener. They were so proud! I get this after years and years of DH and I spending $1,000 every Christmas on his three kids.

Of course, every year, DH gets a big thank you. I get nothing. This year I told DH to NOT put my name on any gifts to anyone in his family (his mother included because she does not thank me, either) and I will accept NO gifts from any of them. Problem solved.

2Tired4Drama's picture

a JAR OPENER? Now that's a classic! Jeez, wonder if they had some ulterior message - related to getting screwed ...or unscrewed! Smile

forgotten wife's picture

Could be but I doubt it. They're too dumb. All they really did was screw themselves because I'll never give nor do another thing for them.

2Tired4Drama's picture

HA HA - Maybe your SD's coworkers had a good laugh at how her scam backfired. Good for you to mention her name and that she was an employee there ...

toywas's picture

My husband and I have been together since 1999 and married in 2003. My favorite holiday is always ruined by my husband's 6 kids (ages range from 26 to 44). Over the years I normally didn't receive anything (and yes I was very hurt!) Then the gifts started coming - my first gift was a large box of prunes,then a 12-pack of Budweiser beer and everyone drank it, then a board game called trailer park trash (I never lived in a trailer), a set of flamingoes advertising I was trailer park trash (again I never lived in a trailer!), a fart game, and a blue velvet 2 piece suit with bright neon emblems on it (wanted me to wear it to church!) I was told I couldn't even donate these items to our church rummage sale!

toywas's picture

These "people" have hurt me moreso than anyone I know. My husband doesn't say a word - he's definitely a Disney Dad. This website has helped me disengage this past year and it's great. After Christmas I am going on "vacation" - hotel, friends or wherever until they leave; hubby is getting angry and atsy. I don't understand why he forgets that this is my Christmas too and it shouldn't be ruined by adult selfish "flamingoes"!

2Tired4Drama's picture

Yes, I am also curious as to what your DH said/did when these happy little elves delivered their "gifts"?

toywas's picture

I know you're asking a serious question but seriously? These are ADULTS and have never been called on the carpet for their behavior!

toywas's picture

Last Christmas one daughter was going to take us out for dinner (our present). Talk about a shock when the 30 of them showed up and we ALL went to a "family" event. Unfortunately it was a place where my ex-husband went (talk about bad memories!) I knew they didn't know this but when asked why I was down, I told them the truth and then they get pissed at me because I mentioned "my past life!" Give me a break - every get together I hear the same "do you remember mom and dad ..." story. This year I'm not cleaning house (washing curtains, carpets, bedsheets, etc). Again, hubby is getting antsy.

As for the prunes, I left them in the cupboard for a year and wanted to give them back to the son for his birthday (it's right around Christmas)! Hubby nearly had a meltdown especially when he opened the prunes and found maggots in them. Damn- was this my fault too!?!

sandye21's picture

Your skids sound like they crawled from under a rock - worse than trailer trash. Just curious - if you could have given them anything to show your 'gratitude', what would it have been? I was SOOO tempted to buy my SD a book on etiquette or maybe "How to Win Friends and Influeance People".

shes driving me crazy in my retirement's picture

Sandy - Hmmm, what a good idea. Sadly I feel that might be a waste of time and $$$ or might just go right over my Twit's head.

sandye21's picture

Ya, true. SD would have thought it didn't apply to her - but then at least she would know what I thought of her.

jumanji's picture

I'm not a stepmom, but I have to say that none of the kids mentioned here should be getting anything.

And I blame BOTH parents for not teaching them better. I always felt that it was my job to make sure that my kids, when they were young, had appropriate gifts for their Dad, stepmom and stepsibs for appropriate holidays - Christmas, birthdays, etc. Now, not knowing the latter three, I am sure some of the gifts weren't completely on target (especially when the kids were little). But they were never crappy gifts.

As adults? It is now on them to follow through on what they were taught.

I'm sorry your stepkids' parents dropped the ball.

LONGTIME SM's picture

Again these are adults. How long are parents bashed for an adult child's behavior. It's not that they weren't taught any better because they seem to not engage in these antics with anyone other than sm.

jumanji's picture

Because I'd bet their parent(s) allowed them to get away before they were adults. Sorry for trying to give some insight.

LONGTIME SM's picture

Your previous comments have stated you are not a sm. are you an adult step child. You have no blogs. If you are not a sm or a sf why are you on this forum.

Krispey Kreme's picture

I think you scared jumanji away, LOL!
Maybe she/he was trying to stalk her steppie?

jumanji's picture

Not at all - I work retail and tis is a somewhat busy time of year. I simply hadn't gotten back to this thread.

No, I am neither a stepmom, nor a stepkid. I am the parent of two who have a stepmom & stepsibs, however. I'll be honest - I don't really know her or her kids. My only interaction with her has been when I have emailed my ex regarding the kids, he forwards to her and she replies. However, from the get-go, I made it clear to the kids that they are to treat her/them with (at least) respect, and there would be (unpleasant) consequences here if they did not. And followed through. If one of them had even considered a gift like some of you have mentioned? I'd be pissed at them. (But to be fair, my kids ARE a little quirky - the youngest already told me what she got me for Christmas - she's a Bio major, and the pig she dissected last term had twin piglets. I am getting one of them. Not quite what I expected, but... I like that she is sharing something that excites her. I think...)

Why am I here? To hopefully gain some insight into such relationships and how to help my kids avoid some of the pitfalls, and perhaps provide some input from the other side.

I have read a lot of things that have given me food for thought. Which is a good thing, I think. I hope I may have been able to provide the same. Sometimes a different perspective can help one see things in a new light. Sure, some posts have raised my hackles, and I have generally stayed away from them as I know a lot is venting. Which we ALL need sometimes.

But I do believe I have learned some things from all of you.

twopines's picture

LONGTIME SM, I agree with you. DH's kids were definitely taught better by DH and BM. I don't blame DH for SD27's self-centered behavior, because I've seen how he interacts with her over the last 10+ years.

LONGTIME SM's picture

I know. My h taught his son and daughter better also. He even took them shopping for others when they were growing up so they could feel the joy of giving not just receiving. Didn't seem to stick as the few times they gave us a gift they deliberately sent dime store gifts. Most of the gifts were junk These people make decent money. Most of the time they sent nothing and then got mad because they thought they didn't get enough.

sandye21's picture

Good point. We all learned a few manners from our parents but I'll bet several of you can say you learned a lot about being an adult after leaving home. It makes one wonder what they give their friends for surely they wouldn't have any by now.

Wickedess's picture

The only time I got a Christmas gift from one of them it was a pair of socks. Blum 3

shes driving me crazy in my retirement's picture

Must have been what Twit gave me for Christmas last year......a "vintage" (aka carp) ash tray and I don't even smoke!! A year before that she gave me 4 stained, dirty napkins she picked up at a second hand store. Yuck, filty and stained beyond belief. Said she got them for me because she knew I like nice table linen. Well, yes I do, but I like it to be quality and CLEAN.

These gifts were meant to insult. When I called her on it about the ash tray she cried and said I was terrible because: It was the thought that counted! Now this Twit is 48 years old.

As I said on that other thread, I wouldn't be surprised to get a box of used lotto tickets or a broken back scratcher this year. Would be in line with what she does.

BUT, having wisesd up and disengaged, Twit isn't getting anything from me. I use to buy her nice items, sometimes the same thing I was giving my own daughter. No more. Hope DH gets out and shops (but it doesn't look like that is gonna happen), otherwise Twit is SOL.

Krispey Kreme's picture

Only three times in the 33 years DH & I have been married has SD41 given me a Christams gift. One was a miniture cardboard hatbox with a fake flower on top. Inside was a packet of flower seeds. It was old and worn looking, like a gift she had received years ago. The seeds were outdated.

Several years later I received a stained glass hummingbird feeder and nectar. It too was in a used looking box. I hung it up and it leaked. I guess that's why she didn't want it. I threw it away.

Then one year I received a cheap looking metal lantern (the kind you put a votive candle in). It looked slightly dusty.

The only other gift I received from her was red roses on Mother's Day. I was surprised. So was she. DH had them sent and put her name on the card. I don't know if that really counts?

Both times DH and MIL crapped their pants with joy over her thoughtfullness. Gag me.

Krispey Kreme's picture

And stupid me, I thanked her nicely for the flowers. The look of shock (and horror) on SD41's face said it all. She was horrified that I would think that she would ever buy me a thoughtful gift with her own money. It was just one more awkward, unpleasant situation and an opportunity for her to show me disrespect. That was the last time DH pulled a stunt like that.

bi's picture

i'm just hoping for the gift of her absence this year. i'm not going to Christmas at mil's, i have to work. i'm sending any gifts fdh has for sd or her family with him. i'm hoping very hard that she does not show up here on Christmas morning again, ruining my time with my kids. she has her own family this year. she can stay her ass at home!

shes driving me crazy in my retirement's picture

I, too, would love the gift of Twit's absence but I fear that is not to be. Even though she has been ignoring her father's calls et. al., you can bet your butt that she is gong to show up sometime between Christmas Eve and New Years (probably Christmas Eve when she sees my DD's car in the driveway) to collect the loot she expects. Is she going to be in for a big surprise. Will be very, very interesting to see how she handles it.

bi's picture

do tell what it is that is going to surprise her!~ Wink what is she expecting and what is she actually getting?

Krispey Kreme's picture

Record it and put it on YouTube so we can all see it. We all could use a good laugh!

shes driving me crazy in my retirement's picture

My gift to Twit is the gift of nothing, nadda. I disengaged after last year's and the previous yers fiascos with her. And I can bet that DH isn't going out shopping for her so, while my DD and everyone else will have gifts under the tree, Twit will be SOL. I'm done with her. She is my DH's problem.

And that is exactly what she got this year....NOTHING. The look on her face was worth millions in my book. Do I feel bad, guilty? Hell now, it has been some 18 years in the making. As I said on another thread, I have found that when I have nothing invested in her, there is nothing she can do to hurt me. She is no more than a stranger, an apendage that happened to come along with her father. I owe her nothing. I wanted to be friends, treat her like a daughter, like I treat my daughter, etc., but she wanted to be mean, nasty, etc. So, she is reaping what she sowed, as the Bible says.

Krispey Kreme's picture

The gift of absence sounds wonderful. I think it would be my favorite gift evah! Now if I could just get MIL to stay gone. Unfortunatly, emotional vampire MIL always comes over on Christmas eve and spends the night, whining and bitching the whole time (and talking at techicolor length about her bowels and bowel movements). Don't ever politely ask MIL how she is unless you like hearing about her bowels, gag me!

Lady's picture

The last time we had Christmas with the Stepbrats.My DH got really nice gifts.I got pancake mix and a bottle of syrup wrapped in saran wrap.My D got a small bottle of lotion and half of it was used and a ladybug broch for about an eighty year old woman. There is no better way to say I hate you and I really got the message.Now I dont buy them nothing for Christmas and I love it.

shes driving me crazy in my retirement's picture

When kids, even SK's are young those little dittzy gifts can be fine. I have my own collection of cheap beads, pins, etc. received from my DD when she was young. BUT, adults KNOW BETTER, or at least should.

2Tired4Drama's picture

I agree. There is a difference between kids' gifts and gifts from adults who are "supposed" to be thoughtful about it.

Unfreakingreal's picture

I don't have any crappy gift stories. My SS20 gave me a beautiful Pandora necklace last year for Mothers Day. Picked it out and paid for it himself. Right now he isn't making a lot of money so for my birthday he got me a card that I thought was the funniest thing ever.
It had a donkey on the cover with a tag hanging off that said "75% off." It said "Since I know how much you love a discount...."
The inside read "I got you this cheap ASS card. Happy Birthday."
My SD12 picks out flowers for me & cards. (Dad pays but I still think it's sweet)

Sweetnothings's picture

Gift ???

What Gift ???

I'm just thankful we are thousands of miles away from the crazy now.....

That's the BEST gift EVER !!! Biggrin Biggrin Biggrin

tg703's picture

I'm in the "not a darned thing" group. My 4 kids all give my husband gifts for Christmas, his birthday, etc. Sainted SS has NEVER remembered me in any way except to intentionally exclude me. He doesn't even remember his Father for special occasions, not even Father's Day. I pointed this out to my DH and his answer last Christmas was to buy gifts for himself and put them under the tree with his son's name as the giver. REALLY? He even put a nice gift card for me under the tree, allegedly from SSS. I opened it and told my husband thank you for the gift card. Do you think I DON'T know your handwriting?

Krispey Kreme's picture

I have a friend who received deodorant, a nail kit, shampoo and a brush from her DH's hillbilly family. She was so hurt (are they trying to say I smell bad?), then she got mad. She later divorced this clown. It was really rude as she'd always tried to be kind and considerate to them.

Nightshade's picture

I got a pair of candle holders from Dollar Tree(I know because she left them in the dollar tree box)and my cousin and my best friend(who she barely knew) each got a large jar Yankee Candle(and made that quite obvious by giving them in the original Yankee Candle bags!! She was 25 or 26 at the time. Now I get nothing and I'm quite happy with that because I don't have to see her!

Towanda's picture

I read where Narcissists were terrible gift givers and it fits one SD to a tee as far as being a Narcissist. Broken presents, wrapping up stuff she sells ie: Taste of Home, or Body Shoppe stuff, my hubby got just as bad presents from her too. Broken, unfinished projects, once a gift certificate from Wendy's(that is like a McDonalds place here).
SS always draws a picture of something he meant to buy for us but didn't have time and he will get it as soon as possible. Never does. (I am still close to him though, he thinks his sisters are nuts!)
Third SD gave nice, thoughtful presents to both of us. Narcissist sis just got a firm grip on her a few years ago so her last gift was taking our grandchildren away from us permanently.
It will be our third Christmas without the SD's . Looking forward to it!

FunTimesFunTimes's picture

Hmmm. Trying to recall from the dark recesses of my mind if my SD's got me anything, ever......

Ok, now I remember. My OSD gave me a "f*ck you" one Christmas morning and YSD gave me the finger.

Fun times I tell ya. Fun times Smile

Sickofthem's picture

Never have gotten a thing. Neither has my husband. Oh wait, he has received info as to which bank account he should deposit Christmas money into. He has also been given the opportunity, and of course took the opportunity, to drive SKs to the airport for their annual Christmas vacation, which of course, he paid for months before. At least they are out of my hair for the holidays, which is why I keep my mouth shut.

steppedonstep's picture

This year SD gave a carrot and a stick... Despite her adult temper tantrum toward me in September, she made known that she and her family would make donations to charity this year instead of exchanging gifts. I told DH my family and I would not be exchanging gifts with SD or donating to charity for them this year since she has not apologized. Christmas morning DH came home (from her house) with a personalized calendar that SD makes for him every year. There are many pictures of SD, her family, DH...tanned, having fun, nice looking people. Then flip a page and there is a large picture of ME which is absolutely horrible - hot, sweaty, no makeup, frizzy hair. I showed the calendar to my mom and hairdresser and they both thought it was a really bad picture so it isn't my imagination. Even DH, after trying to say I looked nice in the picture, finally said "I don't think she did it on purpose." He must have known what I was thinking. BUT -- she sent cards to my family and I, with DH, on Christmas morning with messages of the charities she donated to in our names. So, she gets a pass from DH because that was so kind of her.

emotionaly beat up's picture

I'm not sure what to say here, to say I got nothing would not be exactly right, but to say I got a gift wouldn't be right either so you guys can make it what you will.

ONE Christmas DH was given a cheap bottle of port from the supermarket. When the unwrapped gift was handed to him SD said, Very Loudly and Clearly. "Here dad, this is for YOU" Yes, the emphasis was on the YOU. So I'm thinking he got cheap port and I got insulted Smile He never did drink the port so I guess that year I was the only one who go something from her }:)

This year I got peace, perfect peace and I loved it. No inlaws, no Steps. Best Christmas I have had in years and years. Looking forward to many more of them.