Dog destroys family
Patience have run out - need some sanity via this forum please. My stepson decided to get a puppy with his now ex-girlfriend during their last week of college. Needless to say, he wasn't able to care for it as he got a job in a large city and works long days. He asked his dad and me to care for it after only having him for about 6 weeks. Typical, I know. I have heard from many parents that they have dogs dumped on them. To keep this short, the burden of caring for the puppy fell on me, along with my other dog and 2 teenage bio children. The situation created a lot of household stress as I also work full-time. The agreement was that he would take the dog when we traveled-never happened. Never took the dog, never paid any expenses related to the dog (which now includes kennel expenses), has visited at most 10 times over the year. While here, doesn't feed, let him out-nothing! We had one major incident about 9 months ago where he demanded to take the dog in an effort to save his relationship with the ex-girlfriend. After much disrespect and nasty emails, he dropped it. My H tried very hard to have logical conversation with him and eventually we moved on and ignored the event. He expressed his dislike for me to his dad but not directly to me except for his "cold shoulder". Now a few months later he has indicated that he doesn't want to be part of our family because we stole his dog. This comes on Xmas night after having spent the day with his bio mother who once advised him to steal the dog back and give it to the ex girlfriend. My H is understandably upset and has tried to speak with him and email him and he is down right nasty and expressing his hatred for everyone in my household. My question to you all is: How do I best support my husband? My Sson cleary needs emotional counselling, how do we go about suggesting that? Or should I be indifferent and give up? One other fact, I have been more supportive than his own mother for 12 yrs. She never even went to his HS or College graduations...I did it all plus so much more.
i've had a dog dumped on me
i've had a dog dumped on me more than once by kids. i would have given the dog to the kid because it was his and he would have realized that he couldn't care for it and that it wouldn't save the relationship. he probably would have had it a week and brought it back.
now that its over, what do you do? well, you have to realize he's making excuses for his pain and blaming you as a convenient escape. to blame you makes him feel like its not his fault. kids hate taking the blame for their own choices.
he abandonded the dog. he tried to use the dog to save a relationship. this is unrealistic, thank God it wasn't a baby they were haggling over. the BM is just trying to worm her way in an be important after she did nothing for the boy when he was younger and is now trying to forge some relationship based on wacky dog problems.
if you suggest counseling he'll just go further down into his feeling that you are against him. the dog didn't cause this, delusional people caused this.
love the dog, hate the ss!! i
love the dog, hate the ss!!
i think indifferent is the way to go. maybe one day the cry baby will find a new gf who is allergic to dogs.
This is not the dog's fault.
This is not the dog's fault. It is absolute proof of the total lack of character in your SS. It is time for the dog to go though. IMHO.
The dog needs to go immediately. You don't need the stress and your idiot SS does not need the trigger to be a bigger ass than he is already genetically predisposed to be.
Pick up the phone, call SS and tell him to come get his dog NOW and to bring his check book. When he arrives give him a bill for all of the expenses you and your family have suffered because of the dog. Insist he write a check immediately then follow him out of the driveway when he leaves to his bank and cash the check.
Done with dog, done with idiot SS. Then take you, DH and your BKs out to dinner on the doggy money.
IMHO of course.
Best regards,