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50/50 custody and still child support?

Alison's picture


I'm new and have a few questions on different topics so starting several threads in different forums tonight.

my boyfriend and his wife have separated, Ex-W took him to court for child support this summer. They agreed to 50/50 physical and legal custody of their one 17 year old daughter.

Yet he still pays nearly 1k/month in child support?

The courts reasoning for this was the 'income disparity' between the two parents.

They didn't take into account issues such as :
*His (our) rent is more expensive
*She took the paid off car, he has a car payment
*He pays for their mutual debt

She is financially rolling in it, and saving.. and we're struggling monthly.

This is frustrating! Is this normal?

Tx mommy of 3's picture

Yeah, debt is not considered. Expenses are not considered. A judge would just say to get a cheaper car or find a cheaper place to live. At least sd is already 17 so cs won't last much longer!

Alison's picture

So DH had another CS hearing this week.

SD17 requested to live with us almost full time. (She really doesn't like her mother)

So he went with the offer:
We get SD17
DH waives child support
BM waives spousal support
DH takes debt

BM came back with "20 years 30% spousal support!"

DH makes a *lot* of money, and this is a ridiculous figure totaling over $500k.

She financially blackmailed her daughter. SD17 can't live where she wants, because DH can't afford it.

BM's offer was:
50/50 custody
DH pays $1k/month in child support until SD17 is emancipated.
No spousal.

We took it.

Then she bitched that she had to "miss all this work!" to be in court all the time.

FFS! SHE started this process!

sade777's picture

My husband has 40/60 split (actually more like 42%) and orginally no child support was ordered. Except he pays $200 into the girls college funds and half of medical expenses. She has tried to get child support, even though she makes 3x a much money as he does and her husband makes over 250k a year.
She actually told her daughters that their father should be paying her child support because "it's the law". Even though it was never ordered. However in the state we live in, they don't take the CP income into account. Right now, there is still no child support ordered. Hopefully it will stay that way because we would be really hurting finacially if he had to pay.

Every state is different. In some states, she would be paying him because of the income difference.

DaizyDuke's picture

I'm not trying to be a brat here, but I don't get it?
you say you are struggling monthly while having to pay BM $1,000.00 in CS but that DH makes a lot of money to the tune that 30% would be $500K??

No matter what the amount I understand that it sucks big time having to fork out hard earned money to a BM who thinks she's entitled because she has the "golden uterus" luckily you only have a year to go!

NCMilGal's picture

Daizy, my quick math looks like this:

$500k for 20 years = $25k/year = $2k-ish/month. If $2k-ish/month = 30%, that's less than $7k/month gross. Take out that 30% and another %30 for taxes, and you're left with $2800/month net for expenses.

Even adding in the spousal support that's not being taken out, that's ~$5k/month net, so $1000 in CS is a pretty big chunk. I'd be saying 'ow' too. Especially with 50/50 custody!

StillSearching's picture

This is normal, my BF pays a grand a month in child support and he has 50/50 custody of his 2 kids.

Halgsmom's picture

We have my stepson 75% of the time and my SD 100% of the time and we are custodial.... but WE STILL PAY SUPPORT to the BM. It costs us over $300 a month for her to have one of the two kids 4 days a month.

soon2bestepmum's picture

Now that is just pathetic. Someone who can't afford to take care of their own child 4 days per month shouldn't have them at all.

Halgsmom's picture

I agree. You bet your butt if she had to pay DH when she WAS custodial she would have NEVER paid him a dime. She thinks he should be the only one to ever pay for anything the kids need. If support doesn't cover it, they don't get it. Which is why we now have custody because that included medical care (even though they had double medical coverage she HATES our insurance because it is through a hospital she HATES) and support didn't cover the basic need to have a mother/parent around to raise them. So she just didn't. Hense the reason why my then 7 year old SS got EXPELLED from school. He had no Mother.

dragonfly5's picture

It is normal my SO pays $1100 per month (2 kids )has 40/60 custoday and pays all medical insurance and half of the medical bills. And she is always asking for extra's or having the kids do it.