Thinking about leaving
Wow, I haven't been on here in a while,it's nice to see that I am not the only one still having issues. Alot has changed since my last blog but here is the catch up. I tried to work it out with DH after his ultimate betrayl but I was so hurt. Well, I am still hurt it was so silly of me to believe that I could recover from something like that. Things went from bad to worst. I was so hurt from his betrayl that almost a year later Z began an affair. I stayed because we have kids but, I do not think its worth the fight anymore. I ended the affair and thought that a tick for a tact would make me feel better but it didn't I am not a cheater it just did not feel right not because of my feelings for him but because of the promise I made God. But here I am three years later and I still am hurt when I talk about it and I even cry. I do not feel the same as I did when I married him and he does not make me happy anymore it is as if when he tried to go backwards and cheat on me with his ex it took something out of me. Something that I can not seem to get back am I wrong for feeling that this marriage is over and that it is damaged beyond repair does anyone have any advice????
If he cheated on you with his
If he cheated on you with his ex, than sadly to say there is still some feelings between them. i know if my husband cheated on with his ex i would be out of the picture. How can you do it? i wouldn't even feel right letting him talk to her with out me being there! i would go insane day by day!! leave him let him run to you if he really loves you he will. Good luck and keep ur head up.
People do move past cheating
People do move past cheating in relationships; its possible. The tone of your post, however, sounds like someone who knows they're not going to be able to do that. Am I right?
Why of all people did he have
Why of all people did he have to cheat w/ex? I would have trouble moving past that too. I don't think I could.
So do what you need to do honey, God will understand-!!
Sorry but, I agree with the
Sorry but, I agree with the others. An ex would be unforgivable. I might be able to get past a one night fling. But, not something with that much history. You would never be able to trust him when he has to deal with her.
Does he know you cheated on him?
I feel so bad for you.
I feel so bad for you. [hugs]
Now for the feel-good revenge plan: Tell him you are leaving him for someone you love more than him. (This person you love more than him, is you. But you do not tell him that. Let his imagination eat him up.)
I am a zero tolerance guy
I am a zero tolerance guy when it comes to cheating. However, I have extended family who have gotten past an infidelity.
My brothers, wife's sister cheated on her husband. If I was her husband I would have kicked her adulterous ho ass to the curb. She gave him their daughter and ran off with her fuck buddy on more than one occassion. Her husband was in Med school and kept giving their daughter back when his wife would snail her way to the door sobbing for forgiveness asking for their daughter.
When he finished Med school they reconciled (Hmmmmmmmmmmm? maybe the money had something to do with her comming back and being faithful).
He actually took her back which completely boggled my mind. His reasoning ...... she is my best friend and I wanted my best friend back. :? That actually made sense to me.
They have been reconciled for 3 years and seem to all be happy. Their daughter is thriving, his career is thriving, her career is thriving and they are currently successful as a family.
So, if you want this to work I would recommend taking the perspective that my bro's BIL took. Get past the infidelity by focusing on what your H brings to your life. Is he your best friend? Does he bring a joy to your life that would allow you to overlook his infidelity?
Good luck.