Hello everyone,

I am new to this website, and thought that it may do some good to share my situation, and see if there is anyone here who can offer any advice.

My wife and I dated for 3 yrs, before getting married almost 6 months ago. She was previously married with twins(B/G-now 5y/o). I was single. I have been experiencing all types of problems from the children's BF. I dated my wife for almost 6 months before meeting the kids. When the subject first came up, I felt that it was important to meet their father first.

For several months he resisted the idea of meeting me, because knew that I didn't want to meet the children before meeting him. It's a situation that no one should be in, but if the shoe was on the other foot, I'd want to meet someone who would be spending time with my children. To this day, the man has never met me or been able to look me in the eye (the 3 times that I have seen him).

Eventually, we gave up on the idea of me meeting him, and I began to interact with the children. The custody is split, and had only dated on days when the children were in his care. Once I spent time with the kids, and the threat of me becoming their stepdad became apparent to him, he threw all but the kitchen sink at us.

I've had my car keyed, threatening phone calls, false police reports filed against me, to him telling the kids that God doesn't love me or their mother. I would never disrespect their father, or show him up, because they love him. Nor would discount a parent's love for their child.

He works in social services, as a counselor. It gets better. He took the children to the police, stating that he was concerned that I molested them, because one of the kids was wetting the bed. For 3-4 months prior to this trip to the police station, he was communicating with their BM about potty training via email. What 2-3 y/o doesn't wet the bed? He tossed around some statistics and his credentials, and tried to work the very system he is employed by against me. The forensic examiner met both children, according to the detective, and they knew within a few minutes that nothing happened to the children.

Is this an immature dad or an unethical act by someone who is paid to work in social services? Very few people could relate to how I felt and what I was going through. He is constantly using the children as pawns, because he cannot get beyond himself.

I feel like I am raising two kids, and an ex-husband. As a newly wed, I almost feel displaced in the ongoing custody battle. The lawyers are dragging this out, and the checks that I write are getting bigger. Now that the chidren are 5 y/o, they know that their father doesn't like me, someone he still hasn't meet, or spoke with more than twice.

He tells them that they are not allowed to call me "dad" or or anything other than my first name. He's remarried and has his wife convinced that my wife & I are the ones acting Psycho and out to get him.

He is one vindictive and insecure person. He is the kind of person who sneaks over, in the middle of the night, and takes the only vehicle & carseats away from his ex-wife. He left a mother w/o transportation, when that was the only thing that he agreed to give her, after they were legally separated.

He doesn't pay child support or alimony, and lives in the house that he and his ex, my wife, bought, with his new wife. What a mess!

My wife and I found a house in the same neighborhood which I lived in while I was single. The kids attend the best school in the Dallas area. I try to provide for my family, and deal with this B.S. with their best interest in mind, and I feel like I am wearing down from all of this chaos. This forum is allowing me to at least vent.

Hopefully, there are some of you who can offer any advice or insight to dealing with such a situation. I put my family first and feel like I am always last. I try to explain to my wife how I feel, she truly can't relate.