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At my wits end!!

nursegonenuts's picture

My husband and I have been married for almost 2 years now. I have two SD 18 and 9, each have different BM. The 18 yr old never calls or comes around unless she wants money, the 9yr old is here at least every other wknd if not every wknd. The BM of the 9yr old also has teen daughter who is friends with my 18 yr old SD. This makes for a very unpleasant situation as BM of 9 yr old speaks negatively about my husband and I in front of not only the 9 yr old but also the 18 yr old when she visits "her friend". The 18 yr old HATES me because of this and I feel only a matter of time until the youngest feels the same with all that is said about us on a daily basis. I have two biologic children as well, both teenagers and I NEVER talk about their father negatively. That being said, both skids are master manipulators, lie if it suits them. The youngest is better at manipulating DH and one never knows if she's lying. I'm to the point of leaving because it's just too much drama and BS. DH thinks if he's home-he works away usually 2 wks at a time-then SD 9 should be here too. This leaves little to no time for he and I. If he's home two wknds n a row he thinks we should have her even though it's BM weekend with her. I'm tired of begging for time with my husband! When I say something, he throws up that my kids are with me all week and he doesn't get to see his perfect little angel (gag) as often. HELP....I NEED HELP!!!

nursegonenuts's picture

Well, we can't even close our bedroom door when she's here. Even after she goes to bed....because then she wants to go home to her mommy. So, he's only here on wknds. She's here when he's here and we can't have any private time......Maybe I'm just bei.g silly but I NEED alone time.

Orange County Ca's picture

Daddy has a point. Why not let him have his time? You're a big girl now and you'll have exclusive access to him in less than 10 years for the next 40? 50? Long enough to be well sick of him I'm sure. Plus you may find he's not overly enamored with your kids to boot.

Don't be surprised if given a choice of less time with his kid and you leaving you're on the short end of the stick.

I encouraged my new wife to spend time with her kids and widowed mother as all three of them would be gone in a few years.

nursegonenuts's picture

I wont be here in ten yrs if things continue as they are. That's the problem! I only wrote a short summarize of things, if I sat here and told everything that's went on, I'd be bere for days! She tells my kids that if they don't do things the way she wants them, her daddy will make us leave. She steals things, I have to check her bag before she leaves, and the lies....they're endless. But she bats her eyes and says love you daddy and that's it. He sets her on his knee, pats her back and says dont do stuff like that. Then she smiles, says ok and goes on her way to continue doing the same things. It's endless.....