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i hate BM!

Calypso1977's picture

BM is really grating on me.

she "trolls" facebook constantly because annoyingly some of fiance's family and friends havent defriended her. i hate that she can see what we are doing through them, and i really hate that they seem to have no loyalty to us by being nice to her after everythign she put my fiance through both during their marriage and this recent crap where she was withholding SD from us.

then today i heard she had a 20 minute conversation with one of fiance's co-workers who she only peripherally knows and happened to run into. wtf

i dont like any of it.

Maxwell09's picture

We had this trouble yesterday. I had long ago deleted my Facebook and have deleted everyone but my own family from Instagram and don't have a personal twitter bc that too has been stalked to the nth degree. I tried convincing DH to delete his bc it's just a way for her to keep tabs on us. Literally if we post pics of SS at a certain park, the next week shell do the same and it doesn't stop there. It finally came to a head when she started texting him about his post offending her that he just deactivated it. Social media is just a shit stirrer and can only lead to trouble. I'd advise him to get rid of it.

tessa12's picture

We don't have any social media. Is wonderful. It makes people really unhappy and isn't real life.

Maxwell09's picture

Agreed!! I have found the best sort of freedom since I ended it. It's refreshing.

SugarSpice's picture

the first mistake was to friend bm of facebook. i would never do that.

agree that unfriending all contacts with bm is the best answer.

at the worst, open a new account.

Orange County Ca's picture

Being 'liked' on social media is like sitting at the 'cool' table in the insane asylum.

I visit my Facebook page maybe 3 times a year mainly to see if my granddaughter (who doesn't have a email account) has posted anything to me. It's a long story. I joined it to find old buddies and girlfriends of whom I've connected with about 8 or 10. Now its value is close to zero.

If you can't stand this woman's demonstration of jealously (that's all it is) then I don't see any choice but to do what others here have recommended - stop sending your Facebook postings to mutual friends, stop posting anything to Facebook or just shut down your account completely.

You can post pictures on a photo sharing site and send links to only those you want to allow in by using a password.

vickimill26's picture

We love FB! We were never friends with BM on FB, yet she blocked the both of us over a year ago. We never cared to look, she just came out and told SO one day that she did. So, good saved us the trouble. She now creates fake names and tries to friend SO. Too long to explain how, but he always knows it's her.
We know she must be looking through a mutual friend because she punishes the two girls anytime there is a smiling picture of all us. And even tells the kids that they are getting punished because they look "happy" in the same picture that I am in.

Calypso1977's picture

to clarify - i am NOT friends with BM on facebook nor is my fiance.

the problem is that fiance's brothers's wives are friends with BM as is his brother's mother in law. so if we post, say, a pic of SD and the cousins, it shows up on the wives pages where BM can then see it. which if she just saw it i wouldnt be as annoyed, but she always has to take it to the next level by liking it or commenting. trolling is trolling - we all do it to some degree as its part of social media. but be passive about it already! look but dont comment.

im more annoyed abotu the coworker convo. to me that dangerously edges on interfering with fiance's private life/matters.

Calypso1977's picture

i think i have mine set that way but i wonder if it does something funky when you tag someone? like the tag then gives friends of friends the ok to see them?

and of course it wouldnt solve the issue if one of the wives took a pic and posted it.

i guess maybe my real annoyance is more with the lack of loyalty on the part of fiance's family members. and from what fiance told me, his ex wife was never tight with any of them (in fact, family drama was a major reason their marriage ultimatley crumbled) so i guess i dont get why they even want to be associated with BM. i know there are some instances where in-laws or whatever remain close to the divorcee because they were close during the marriage. but that wasnt the case here.

SMof2Girls's picture

If you block her, she shouldn't be able to see anything you do, even if your mutual "friends" comment or tag you.

If all else fails, give up Facebook. It's such a draining time sucker anyway ..