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Help!!!

Sezzza's picture

Ok so a few things...BM and SO split up when SS was just less than 1, when he was 1 and a half she disappeared and it took my partner an entire year to get court orders in place..less than a year later she disappears again and it takes another year to find her, she failed to show up in court so the court ordered SS to stay with me, my partner and our 1 and a half year old which is fine but when he comes here he seems so psycologically damaged...1stly hates all doors being closed can't even go to the toilet without him cracking it and screaming and bashing the door etc, 2ndly if he can't find my partner or I within a couple of seconds he just breaks down in tears....from conversations we have had with him it seems like his BM has left him alone on Occassion to go to the shops as bad as that sounds in her defence she lives in a small town of less than 300 people...however the way he acts gives me the impression that she didn't seem to care that leaving him was stressing him out so now he has separation anxiety disorder, 3rdly he barely eats is malnourished and weighs only 5kgs more than BS who weighs in a 10kg at 1.5yrs old and SS is 4.5 yrs old....I feel as though my partner should be going for primary care however I'm worried we won't be able to stay this behaviour out of him....also he is very dependant which is a big change from what he was before all of this

Sezzza's picture

He does insist me or his dad stay with him always he cries if we walk away in fact sometimes he even claims he can't go to the toilet by himself or dress himself or pull the blanket over himself basically anything I know he can do himself and will scream and kick if he doesn't get his way....I can't close any door and be on the other side of it without his crying so it goes beyond normalcy....there are times when a door needs to be shut for safety purposes,(I live in a 3 story house youngest can't climb down stairs yet) but If I need to go upstairs for something he will find something to open that door with, he refuses to believe that I will come back.....on top of that he can't take basic instruction and will constantly not listen....i know what is normal for a 4 ur old and basic anger management is one of them my SS has 0 anger management skills not even basic.....he even runs when he hurts himself instead of looking for comfort like most kids....