Halloween Candy, Pneumonia & Toxic Troll
SD15 Backstabber DESERVES to have fun on Halloween!
The battle cry of many a BM, who likes to make the biofathers and dads out to be horrible Haloween Party poopers that dont want their children to have fun.
So, Dh gets a very long text yestery afternnon around 1, from Toxic Troll who is working (hallelueja!) and tells him that SD22 Feral Forgers boyfriend (wait, what?) has pneumonia and can he please pick up SD15 B/M so she can go to her Halloween party because "she deserves to have fun this Halloween".
Dh's response, after showing me and me weighing in, was naturally sure, but she stays with us. AND of course Toxic Troll takes that as we are going to keep precious halloween-deprived princess at our house out of Cruel Intentions to prevent her from having the fun she DESERVES. And texts him that its ok, he doesnt need to pick her up, Feral Forger has left the apartment with friends (friends that dont want to live with her). So then he gets another text "justs drop SD15 off at the party Ill take care of the rest!"
Now - lets take a stroll memory lane shall we? And recall when DH recieved a text from TT boyfriend at the time, TWeedle Dum, that he was sleeping in his car hiding from Toxic Troll who he was afraid was going to wake up soon and see the bruises on her face and body and accuse him of beating her up (which he did later on but was Alcohol Free at this time). And tells the story of Toxic Troll getting drunk at a party and arguing and then trying to get out of the car while TW D was driving and rolling herself into a ditch.
And we had been calmly sleeping after a quiet evening after trick or treating with kiddo. Not to mention the many times I have purchased kiddo costumes. But we are all about preventing kiddo from enjoying her Halloween and she is MOTY for protecting her kiddo from being deprived.
Sorry - I know this is such a little thing. But Im worried about getting sick now, even though SD15 has been really good about wearing her mask everywhere and generally stays away from feral forger when she can.
I dont want to get sick, cannot afford to get sick as work is really busy right now and DH doesnt want to get sick...
I guess we will all just take precautions...
Additionally
I should add that our week starts this Monday...
Additionally
I should add that our week starts this Monday...
Your first sentence reminds
Your first sentence reminds me of when BM wanted SS to go to private school, and sent a long email manifesto that ended with "SS is a great kid, he deserves to excel." Well, he went to that private school, and it turns out no one deserves to excel if they don't do any work. But thanks to BM's ways, he now thinks he deserves to make tons of money without working.
Is SD vaccinated?
Lol, he deserves to excel.
Lol, he deserves to excel. Sounds like he would have been more likely to excel in an easier school.
I know, as if it was the
I know, as if it was the school that was the problem. That what she thought the issue was, until he did terribly in the private school, and then in the best district in our area; and finally had to be dragged through to graduation in their troubled kids program.
Last we heard, SS was still blaming the school for his poor grades.
Well, well, it must be the
Well, well, it must be the new buzz word for bm's...SKID deserves. We have heard this too.
Dh and I thought skids deserved clean and sober mothers but he who the heck are we right? We also thought skids deserved to be safe from adult family driving around drunk or high OR both. But hey...who are we.
Not so sure I would be putting out the welcome matt for anyone who had exposure to Pneumonia. Nothing like spreading that around at a Halloween party...
PLEASE stay healthy.---Happy Halloween
I honestly believe most of the bm's are cut from the same mold.
Thanks
Deserving children.
Yeah, this must be because I dont recall this ever being mentioned when I was growing up.
Clean and sober - that reminds me of ANOTHER time that Tweedle Dum lost Toxic Troll while she was taking Sd15 backstabber trickOTreating because he had been drinking and was the driver...
It's a HCBM thing - meant to
It's a HCBM thing - meant to make the other parent feel bad, or make them look bad for not giving into the HCBM's self-serving requests.
Yeah.
I just think she didnt want to be driving and dropping...wanted Husband to do it all, AND he had to buy a gift for $40.
Idisagree. He bought it
Idisagree. He bought it because he chose to, not because he had to. "Sorry, I don't have my wallet/card with me, kiddo."
Exactly - but she can't say
Exactly - but she can't say that - so she tries to make it impossible for DH to refuse or he feels like a bad father. Or so she hopes. That's what I mean by self-serving - it's really never about the kid and what they supposedly deserve. But the sad part is that they transmit to the kid that the other parent isn't doing what they "deserve".
Parenting
He has always done so much more for skiddo. The whole way along. Even with his lack of parenting wrt schooling stuff, hes still always been the one at parent teacher conferences, he does all transport, and when she needs something hes always the one to buy it.
So when she does these things, it makes my blood boil a little bit. I guess Im a little triggered.
And I deserve a million
And I deserve a million dollars but .....
"deserves" is a new guilt word used to manipulate.
so what ended up happening?
DH
Picked up SD15 and dropped her off after buying a gift for the birthday girl.
So then he told me that she will do chores during our week. And I automatically had a stomach lurch knowing that I will be the one that does the asking and will be the "eveil" one asking and get all the freaking attitude and freeze outs.
So I calmly suggested dishes for the whole week (it was 40 bucks!) and that hes the one to mention it to her.
Because I am super tired of getting attitude when I ask for things to get done.
No, you will NOT be doing the
No, you will NOT be doing the asking or anything! Nothing. It's on DH. Why couldn't HE decide what she was to do?
You've now told him your expectations and now be done with it. And yes, that means leaving the dishes with not a WORD to either of them.
YES
Im already gearing up for just walking away from dishes...all week. Shes 15.5 and sais how shes excited to be able to get a job...yeah right we shall see
Disengagement handbook:
Disengagement handbook:
DH: SD is going to be doing chores here this week!
You: Oh, that's nice.
DH: What chores should she do?
You: That's up to you. . *changes subject*.
YEP.
Im just going to walk away from those dishes tho*
don't, just don't. he gave
don't, just don't. he gave the $ he can figure it out. don't remind him, don't mention it, don't play his game of making you the bad guy again. do. absotootly. nothing.
And next time, don't suggest
And next time, don't suggest ANYTHING. Let him decide and enforce.
Lots to choose from!
Because its not like she has ANY chores to do...and her grades arent stellar...oops...I did it again! Disnegagment fail!
Why does her school
Why does her school performance bother you so much? That seems to be the one thing you can't let go.
I know...
its the one area that I took complete ownership.
For some reason this weekend my mind kept re-hashing the accusations she made about me - probably because of a recent blog post about accusations, and how they can destroy lives. And then my mind went back as I told another poster what they should have the parent do for the child that refuses to be polite and do their schoolwork...sometimes Steptalk is supremely helpful and awesome and sometimes it brings up old painfilled memories that return to smack me upside the head.
Agreed. That's why I quit
Agreed. That's why I quit posting here shortly after SS PAS'd out almost 7 years ago. It was hard to keep reliving it in everyone else's stories. Well, that and the mean girl Infestation that was on the board then.
Yes, agree
The "mean girl infestation". LoL. Yes.
She goes trick treating at
She goes trick treating at almost 16? A bit old isn't she
More about hanging with friends
I see this meme all the time about "at least our kids are still hanging on to the last shred of their childhood"...I agree with that - shes on her last year and next it will be parties and people doing whatever.
Just saw a news story about a local girl whose remains were found in our county, 19 yo, and murdered about 4 hours north, on Halloween, at a place that had been party central. Glad that skiddo is still enjoying Halloween things as a kid. She hung with 4 of her friends and walked around a safe neighborhood. Toxic Troll wasnt around taking her door to door or anything like that.
So - yes, almost 16 is maybe too old, but who cares?