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Feeling Threatened by His Relationship With the Ex

praha's picture

I've been feeling kind of shitty these days about my relationship with my boyfriend. For the most part things are good with us, but there's one major issue that keeps nagging at me.

For a little background info, we met through work and started an affair while he was still together with his wife (something I am not proud of). Eventually, I got fed up with being the "other woman" and told him that if he didn't leave his wife for me, our relationship would be over and I was moving out of province to go back to school. He didn't leave her, so I moved. We kept in touch while I was away for a year and he ended up moving out and getting legally separated from his wife. When I moved back, we foolishly moved in together immediately and lived together for a year and a half. He has 50/50 custody of his 8 year old son and our attempt to create a "blended family" was not successful. We now live apart but are still in a relationship together.

Here's my issue: my boyfriend and his wife are still not divorced, even though we've been together over 4 years. He has promised me several times that he will get it done by a certain date and it just hasn't happened. I really resent this. It makes me feel insecure about our relationship not only because they are still legally married, but because he keeps breaking his promise to me about getting a divorce. His most recent promise is that he will have it done by the end of this month, but I'm not couting on it. If he hasn't done it, does anyone have any suggestions about how to handle it?

I guess part of the reason I'm so insecure about their lack of a divorce is because they're still pretty close friends. This pisses me off beyond belief. I guess I just wasn't expecting it. I kind of assumed once two people called it quits, that was it. Of course I'm understanding of them communicating when it has to do with their son, but it's more than that. She'll call him just to chat or ask him to come over and fix things for her at her house. WTF?! I guess I'm kind of a possessive person, but this threatens me and he knows it. Also, from things his ex has said to me and things that mutual friends have told me she's said, I'm not too sure she's totally over him (even though she had been cheating on him repeatedly for the 14 years they were married and wasn't sleeping with him for the last year of their marriage). She says things that I feel are intentionally meant to make me feel insecure, like about how her and my boyfriend are still "best friends" and how her ideal retirement would be living in a cabin on a lake with my boyfriend's cabin "just over the hill". Bitch.

Recently, my boyfriend joined Facebook. He wanted to show me the pictures he posted, so he gave me his password to check them out (since I'm not a Facebooker). I admit that I've covertly been checking up on him by accessing his account when he's not around. I know, this is not cool. Obviously I have trust issues with him, or I wouldn't be doing this. Anyway, after reading the messages he has sent to people he's reconnecting with, not one of them mentions his relationship with me. However, most of them mention his relationship with his ex and how they're still "really close" and "see eachother several times a week". That hurts pretty bad. Especially since some of these people have never even met her (it's not like he's updating them on her life because they know her). What is the deal? Why am I not even important enough to him to warrant mention in an update of his life to old friends, yet his ex is? Obviously I'd love to ask him this, but that would reveal that I've been spying on him. What a mess.

What can I do about how I feel and how can I get to the point where I trust him? I know this is ironic, but since our relationship started out as an affair, I worry about whether he will ever cheat on me. I also have a hard time trusting him when he breaks promises he's made to me and when I catch him lying about things. Is this repairable?

frustratedinMA's picture

This is probably NOT what you are going to want to hear. But from what you have stated, and how he is portraying HIS life (w/o a mention of you)..

You need to walk away. 4 yrs is WAY to long to give him at this point. You need to cut your losses and move on. You will find someone new.. Hopefully someone that is emotionally available. Your bf does not seem emotionally available and seems to be still linked and emeshed in his former life..

You need to take back your "power" as Dr. Phil says. You need to break free of this toxic relationship and move on. Let her have him back.. they sound perfect for each other. Find YOUR soul mate, because quite frankly, I dont think he is it.

Good luck!!!! This is meant to encourage you and move you forward, this is not meant to hurt you in any way.

praha's picture

Yes, as I said, I'm not proud of the fact that our relationship began as an affair. Unfortunately, I cannot change that now.

Thanks for throwing that first comment in though, it really helped me with my situation.

storm's picture

"I guess I just wasn't expecting it. I kind of assumed once two people called it quits, that was it."

Ummmm....they haven't even gotten the divorce. How were you not expecting it??? You threatened him the last time, he's still married to her, and you went back to him. I agree with frustratedinMA you need to move on and let them figure out WTF they're doing. Of course you're always going to wonder if he's cheating on you & it's probably not likely you'll ever let that go. If they've both cheated on each other in the past, I agree again, they sound perfect for each other. Let them keep their unhealthy relationship and find something better for yourself.

praha's picture

OK, you don't have to be snarky about it. I don't appreciate you trying to make me feel like an idiot. Obviously a few paragraphs do not convey my entire situation and you have made incorrect assumptions.

When I moved in with my boyfriend, as I said, he and his wife were legally separated. Where I'm from, you have to wait a year before filing for divorce. I moved in with my boyfriend under the impression that he would be pursuing divorce once the year had passed.

I know I should have waited longer, but people make mistakes. I recognize my mistakes, but do not like having them rubbed in my face. I thought that's what this site was for - support, not blatant criticism of a very difficult situation.

Colorado Girl's picture

that anyone is over anything in this situation.

It's a tough position for ALL of you.

The ex-wife probably IS trying to make you feel bad. In the same situation, I would probably do the same if my husband left me for another woman. I would want her to feel the same insecurity that I had felt when he "chose" someone over me. It's a natural reaction. Not the right one...but a natural one.

She's not over hubby and hubby's not over being married to her. He probably does love you but in all his guilt is trying to maintain a relationship with his ex-wife on her terms. Even if that means postponing a divorce that she probably doesn't want.

I think you're angry at the wrong person. BM has never had to have boundaries because your BF doesn't feel the need to set them. They've never really learned to live without each other (hence the phone calls to chat and treating BF like Mr. Fix-It) so they continue in a relationship that is not kosher for a man who is in a serious relationship with someone else.

Also, I have to disagree with other posters that because he cheated on his wife with you, he'll cheat on you. I don't think that is necessarily true. But it can be a hard insecurity to overcome in this type of situation. And HE needs to be the one to help you do just that and staying married to his ex and being her best friend is not the way to do it...

"For every ailment under the sun....There is a remedy, or there is none;
If there be one, try to find it; If there be none, never mind it." ~ W.W. Bartley

praha's picture

Thank you very much for your kind words and for your insight.

I talked to my boyfriend about all of this over lunch today and have been feeling somewhat better about it.

I began by admitting that I had gone on his Facebook page and read his messages behind his back. I apologized for that and then kind of segued into how I felt about him not mentioning me in any of his messages. He apologized and said that he thought the pictures of us together on the site spoke for themselves. He said it hadn't been intentional to leave me out and only mention his ex. I wasn't totally happy with his answer, but what more could I say. He said he understood how I felt and would be more aware of it in the future.

About his ex making comments to make me feel insecure - I do understand why she would feel the need to get back at me, it's just that it's hard to deal with and I needed to vent about it. I do feel sincere remorse about having an affair with her husband and can't imagine how crushed I would be if the same thing were to happen to me. I did bring it up to my boyfriend and he offered to talk to her about it. I told him not to, though. I have to admit, I'd rather not give her the satisfaction of knowing she's getting to me.

I also told him one of the main reasons I want him to get a divorce is because I worry sometimes about him going back to his ex, whether it's a reasonable concern or not. He seemed to understand. I told him that I am (and likely always will be) somewhat paranoid about the possibility of him cheating on me, since our relationship began as an affair, and that I need him to be very aware of my feelings about this and to conduct himself accordingly.

I think I will have to talk with him again about how close he is with his ex. It would feel overly controlling to tell him that they can't be friends, but I find it so irritating when she calls him up over every little happening in her life. It's to the point where she'll call him on his cell on nights when she knows we'll be together to gush about how she got promoted at work, for instance, or ask him if he can update her resume (like she's not capable of doing that herself). I really just wish he would tell her to back off. That would hurt her feelings though. Meanwhile, it's OK to disregard my feelings. I'm all for keeping things amicable for the sake of their son, but grow some balls and set some boundaries, for god's sake. I find it ridiculous.

Anyways, thank you for your advice. If there is anything else you can think of that we might try, please let me know. I want very much for our relationship to work.

Colorado Girl's picture

with the insecurities of my husband's "friendship" with his ex. BUT I have also felt the aftershocks of when they can't even be civil to one another.

Your entire last paragraph is all too familiar for me. My problem is more that BM is in the business of extremes because she is bipolar. She either hates him or he's her best friend. I, personally, think that the two of them should have a more business like relationship but unfortunately, she's not wired that way. So he appeases her to keep the BM waters calm. We sort of live our life on her terms because she can be such a disaster otherwise.

It's all about balance. He knows (most of the time) what exwife involvement I don't find acceptable and makes sure she understands those boundaries. That's his job to make sure I am comfortable. It's possible to make her happy AND ensure my comfort all at the same time. He falls short sometimes, but usually he's pretty good.

"For every ailment under the sun....There is a remedy, or there is none;
If there be one, try to find it; If there be none, never mind it." ~ W.W. Bartley

storm's picture

I don't believe "once a cheater always a cheater" by any means. But, praha's fear of that may be hard to overcome. It's a touchy subject, I'll leave this one alone now.

evilsm's picture

Take it easy honey, no one here is trying to hurt your feelings. We all come here to express ourselves and sometimes our opinions are different but we are here to support each other.

As far as your situation goes, what's done is done, you can not change the past, you can only deal with your future and what you want. If you are catching him in lies now, if he breaks promises to you now why do you think it would change if he was divorced? You asked if I think this is repairable? I think you are the only one that can answer that question. It really depends on how much BS you are willing to deal with. I wish you the best with this, I know it's not easy.


If you want children to keep their feet on the ground, put some responsibility on their shoulders. ~Abigail Van Buren

Colorado Girl's picture

I pass no judgement and throw no stones.

I think yours is one of the most difficult situations, Praha. And if you decide to stay in this relationship, you will have a long, hard road ahead of you.

Is he worth it?

"For every ailment under the sun....There is a remedy, or there is none;
If there be one, try to find it; If there be none, never mind it." ~ W.W. Bartley

sarahbernheart's picture

you should feel threatened your boyfriend IMO has not given you the security you need.
I agree with CG it sounds like neither one of them are ready to "Get over" each other for whatever reasons.
so yes you should feel threatened what to do??
I guess the best would be to express to him how you feel, and if he doesnt understand and really wants to make it work with you then maybe counseling, if he refuses that, then maybe you should think about leaving.
you have so much to give..give it to someone who wants it and needs it.
good luck
I dont think anyone on here is trying to be judgemental, (i hope) sometimes our anger at a situation may make it seem that we are angry at the person. (and I am angry for you)
"Better a diamond with a flaw than a pebble without one."

ColorMeGone2's picture

But we do all call it like we see it and when you ask for advice, you have to put on your big girl panties before reading the comments that you solicited. You don't have to take the advice that doesn't make sense to you and some of it won't, because none of us can read minds. We only know what we tell each other and we comment based on that limited knowledge. Take what you can from it and discard the rest. Most of us here comment with good intentions and want to help, not hurt.

Having said that, I think you already know what makes the most sense for you to do in this situation. It may not be what you want to do and maybe you are looking for a reason to stay, but I can't give you one. I won't say the relationship can't be repaired, but it doesn't look that hopeful to me. I think once a person demonstrates the capacity to cheat, you have to always consider it a possibility. Maybe not a probability, but at least a possibility.

I'm bothered not so much by the cheating that started the relationship as I am by the way you are marginalized in his life and how that has resulted in your feeling like you need to check up on him. I don't know how to make you feel secure in a relationship that started as an extramarital affair. He and his ex may be physically separated, but they are still legally married and it sounds like the emotional divorce has not yet taken place.

If their divorce were final and if you were married to him, I would give you totally different advice. I would tell you to set firm boundaries to protect your life, your home and your relationship from interference from the ex. But with the situation being what it unfortunately is, they are still legally married. Separated, yes, but not divorced. Even though it's been so many years, you are still the interloper here, not the ex. I'm sure I'll catch some flack for that, but that's okay. I firmly believe that it's best to wait until all aspects of a divorce have been completed - the official/paper divorce, the physical divorce, the emotional divorce, the financial divorce, etc. - before attempting to create a new life with a divorcing partner. He is so enmeshed in his previous life that he is just not free to establish one with you and he may be speaking about her, rather than you, to his friends due to feelings of guilt. I don't know. I just don't think it is at all fair to you to constantly be getting the short end of the stick.

If he'll go to counseling with you, maybe that would help. Some people have a hard time with these transitions. If he doesn't see a reason for counseling, then I think you almost have to reconsider the relationship.

Again, not judging or trying to hurt, just trying to offer realistic advice based on what you've told us.

Good luck!

♥ ANNE 8102 ♥

praha's picture

How can you say "No one's here to hurt feelings" in one breath and then, in the next, tell me to put on my "big girl panties"? That is a cunty thing to say, and I think most people would agree with me.

All I'm asking for is a little respect when people are commenting. The subjects that are discussed on this site are very sensitive issues and I would expect that anyone with common sense and a basic sense of empathy would recognize that and would word their responses accordingly.

Otherwise, Anne, I appreciated your opinions and advice.

evilsm's picture

with you praha. I don't think any of the posts here have been disrespectful or unempathetic to your issues, your the one that pulled the see you next tuesday card here. Seems your directing your frustration about your situation in the wrong place.


If you want children to keep their feet on the ground, put some responsibility on their shoulders. ~Abigail Van Buren

Colorado Girl's picture

Took me a minute. That was funny... Biggrin

"For every ailment under the sun....There is a remedy, or there is none;
If there be one, try to find it; If there be none, never mind it." ~ W.W. Bartley

ColorMeGone2's picture

About the "big girl panties" comment... this is a fairly common phrase used on this site more than once and by several of us. Many of us have used it often in reference to our own selves. No harm was meant. I use humor and tongue-in-cheek comments to soften my responses, especially when I feel like the person may be too defensive or emotional to hear what I have to say. You didn't hear that my tone was cajoling. I guess you assumed I was being harsh or sarcastic. I can cut you some slack for that. You're new and you don't know me yet. But use of the "c word" is classless and uncalled-for, no matter how you cut it, and it's demeaning to all women. I don't think you'll find a lady on this site who would agree with your use of it, whether they agreed with my comments or not. "See you next Tuesday" is about as close as most of us will get to even typing that particular word.

I'm sorry you're in the situation you're in. It's a tough spot and I don't envy you a bit. I'm glad you had a productive conversation with your boyfriend and I hope you are able to work things out and find true happiness and security in your relationship. If you stick around here, you will find that we are very much a common-sense bunch and more empathetic, sympathetic and supportive than anyone you'll ever meet in your "real" life. We are not a bunch of strangers taking pot shots at each other or poking sticks at each other's pain. Many of us have grown into a family. We're girlfriends. Many of us maintain friendships away from this site. We don't pull any punches, because we don't have to. A friend is not really a friend if they are more interested in blowing sunshine up your skirt than in telling you like it really is. We appreciate good, old-fashioned honesty. We also appreciate a good debate, so you'll find a lot of that here. We can go toe to toe against each other on some topics, yet still back each other up. You cannot take anything personally. The hardest lesson I've learned from my steplife, and I know CG will back me on this one, is that taking my ego out of it makes everything so much easier. So take your ego out of it, Praha. No one is picking on you. No one knows you, yet, so no one is invested in you yet. Ticking you off does nothing for any of us. We're welcoming you to the party. Loosen up and make some friends.

♥ ANNE 8102 ♥

praha's picture

You're right, that was uncalled for. I will make sure not to use that word here again. I got way out of hand here today. I apologize for being so defensive and will try not to take comments so personally in the future.

now4teens's picture

Your posts are always eloquent, and even when you receive knee-jerk reactions, you remain poised and composed.

Brava! Smile

"If you have never been hated by a child, you have never been a parent."
-Bette Davis

sarahbernheart's picture

what 5teen said!!

"Better a diamond with a flaw than a pebble without one."

Colorado Girl's picture

I LIKE when you girls blow sunshine up my skirt...

Picture Marilyn Monroe's famous photo....that's me. Biggrin

"For every ailment under the sun....There is a remedy, or there is none;
If there be one, try to find it; If there be none, never mind it." ~ W.W. Bartley

ColorMeGone2's picture

Sunshine will follow!

♥ ANNE 8102 ♥

sarahbernheart's picture

thanks for the smiles
"Better a diamond with a flaw than a pebble without one."

SerendipitySM's picture

Whoa, slow down there my friend - of all the women on this site Anne is the least c**** of us all. I can't even type that word out I hate it so much. I understand your feelings and can sympathize with your situation but trust me none of us here are judging you or trying to criticize you. The one thing you need to understand is when you post your issues in a public forum such as this one you are opening yourself up to all comments good and bad and you may read some things you don't want to hear. I just re-read all of the posts and I truly do not feel that anyone said anything hurtful. I think you are very angry and sensitive right now and probably on the defensive just a bit. These are posts not face to face conversations and tone can be everything in a conversation.

Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist. - George Carlin

praha's picture

I guess you're right. I am getting way too worked up over this whole discussion right now and I think I'd better leave it alone for a while until my emotions aren't quite so raw.

I apologize for my overreaction to the advice of some of the posters today. Although I do feel that some of the responses could have been worded a little more diplomatically, I should probably also grow thicker skin.

Again, my apologies.

Angel's picture

does not sound like he is a man of VALUES. That is what is scaring you, and it should scare you. A man with values will have character and he has neither. This is not a good place for you.

Sweetie, if you were my daughter I would advise you to move on.

bellacita's picture

imo, when youre new here, and i admit to this as well, u are alittle defensive at first. its probably the first time youre talking about ur story and its easy to have that knee-jerk reaction to peoples comments. no one is here to criticize u, they are only trying to help...and if they didnt want to help they wouldnt waste their time responding.

hang in there and welcome...

"Given the right reasons and the right two people, marriage is a wonderful way of experiencing your life."
~the late great George Carlin

Sita Tara's picture

I did what you did and walked away. I hoped beyond hope he would choose me, if I gave him the space to miss me.

He didn't.

As a matter of fact he never chose. We saw each other a few times the next year, and I still held onto hope.

Then I lost a dear very young friend and I thought, "What am I doing waiting????? Wishing my life away?????"

Interesting to read your post today, as I am wrapping up a three part blog on my "real life" blog about how I came to be married to my DH. Or should I say, "The man who taught me what it felt like to be given back everything I gave to him."

The dangerous thing about being the other woman, is that you long for justification of that relationship. No one will tell you this but me.
Stop looking for it.

It is a relationship. It may have run its course. It may be well past time to let it go.

I think I can truly understand how much harder that must be for you, being that he seemed to finally choose you. But...

I am still friends with my former affair. We were friends well before, since 16. And I can tell you that if I called him tomorrow, crying, begging to see him...

he would still come to me.

He has never really let go of me the way I have of him. Which means...

he never really chose her either.

I think these men, in honest to God love affairs, just love us both- the other woman and their wives.

And we both love him so much, that we are willing to put our lives on hold in the hopes that he will chose us and validate our love.

There is such a dangerous pattern here. It starts by us, both women- wife and other alike, always putting his needs first. For us "others" it's the jumping and running whenever he is available. Waiting around, not making our own plans in hopes for a glimpse, a minute of his spare time. And for the wife? Not accusing, pretending not to notice. We both are always trying to be the one he choses to the point where we are not listening to our own hearts, our own pain... our own need to be loved purely, sincerely, and put above all others...

FORSAKING all others.

I think your BF's wife is not pushing the divorce because she is still hoping he'll realize what a "mistake" he made.

He's not pushing through because like many men who have affairs he is motivated by fear and guilt. Fear of losing BOTH of you, or either of you. Guilt for what he perceives he is doing to his children, and to two women he loves deeply.

Deeply, but not enough.

If you are interested in hearing more I can send you the link to my blog.

My life is so blissful now, barring blended bull. But even the blended bull is sweeter than it could possibly be if I had ended up with the man who's wife would have had every right to trash me for stepping over the line with her husband. more thing.

My DH knows all about my past. I told him a few months into dating him. I also told him that a part of me will always love this man, as we were dear friends since we were 16.

My DH also knows that this man and I still email a few times a year to say hi, how are you, how's your family.

But most importantly my DH knows that I trust him with all that information because I know in my heart I belong here with him. That we have a far better relationship born out of a natural progression of dating, meeting family and friends, marriage, etc.

I used to say I had walked across hot coals for J (the married man) and stood there, feet burning, waiting for him to be brave enough, believe in us enough, to meet me half way.

At one point rather early on in my relationship with DH, I came to realize that he loved me so much, he would never have allowed my feet to be blistered in the first place. He knew I was hurt, even before he knew the whole story as to how and why I was hurt. And I felt him march across those coals himself to lift me up, carry me across to show me how I deserved to be loved, honored, cherished... and he never even flinched at the journey.

Good luck. God Bless. It's a tough road you are on for sure. My heart is with you.

"Om Tare Tutare Ture Mama Ayurpunye Jnana Putin Kuru Svaha"
~Sita Tara Mantra

ColorMeGone2's picture

The part about how would never have allowed your feet to become blistered in the first place. That was just so poetic. And it's true. My aunt told me a long time ago that if both parties always give more than they expect to receive, then neither should ever be let down. I really think that's part of why I'm such a big giver in my relationships. She really shaped my thinking about marriage and she's been married for 40+ years. My DH has always been a big giver, too. He had a lapse, which everyone knows, but he's back on board after getting his shit straight. It's not just that he'd take a bullet for me, which he would in a heartbeat. He'd not ever put me in the line of fire in the first place. I think that's how we made it through the worst of the yucky BM stuff. He fought his own battle with her and never put me in the line of her fire.

♥ ANNE 8102 ♥

Sita Tara's picture

I actually wrote a poem for J, during the break up year about walking across those hot coals, "Still waiting though I'm burned....Coals no longer touch my blistered faith..."

It was early on in dating DH, perhaps when I finally told him about the affair, and why I was hesitating on the whole "soul mate" concept, that I understood just what kind of man I was dating.

When I told him that I would always have a place in my heart for J, but that now I finally felt that place was in the past, that I would never see him or talk on the phone with him again, but would be continuing to keep in contact via email, and that I needed DH to trust me and my honesty as a sign that I could be trusted...

he had only one question for me.

"Did he ever show remorse for how he hurt you?"

Yes. He still does occasionally mention it. Why? Because he is motivated by fear and guilt.

I believe most people who are in "love" affairs (meaning not just sex at all) are motivated by those things. My mistake all along was projecting my values onto J. But in the end I had to stop ignoring the fact that I never would cheat on anyone. I valued my exH enough to leave him when I felt that disconnected. When I first starting wishing I was single when I met attractive talented men. I never crossed the line and didn't even date until 2 and half years after the divorce.

Then, when that "relationship" didn't work out I knew I was trying to date to avoid the developing relationship with J.

Sept 11, 2001 happened. And J and I contacted each other first. He later told me that day he thought, "If I were in one of those towers with only minutes to call someone, who would I have called? You Z. To tell you I love you. I could not have died without you knowing that."

It was love. But we weren't free to love each other.

He is a musician and at gigs used to play me "Hide your Love away."

He would dedicate it to me.

His best friend of 10 plus years was his sounding board. He and his wife supported him in leaving.

He still couldn't do it in the end.

And then I had to finally admit we were not alike. Acknowledge that for me loving someone, your spouse, meant leaving them rather than hurting by cheating on them.

He wanted to test the other side of the door before walking through. I thought that if he did, he would see how fabulous it could be.

He couldn't trust it. Couldn't risk losing "everything" for me.

But in the end we each lost ourselves.

As Sarah McLauglan says,

"And the cost was so much more than I could bear."

It took me to the darkest year of depression I have ever had. If it weren't for my sons I would never had made it without being admitted somewhere.

As I mentioned in the first reply, had I not finally chosen, inspired by my young friend's passing, to move on completely, we'd still be seeing each other. He could not completely devastate either of us.

And I am so fortunate that DH came along. He is so amazing in the way he loves me, completely, with all his being. He knew within a date or two that I was it for him, and let me know that withing a week or two. Somehow he could tell that I was injured and he needed to aggressively show me how he felt. At first it concerned me that I would hurt him. That I was just falling into him to ease my pain.


His complete and utter understanding of his own feelings for me, no doubts (after crazy BM he SHOULD have been more leery for sure.) He knew. It was that simple.

And part of why to this day I know that should something happen to him I would be lost. Not that he completes ME. But he does complete my LIFE.

Love that man....yessiree I do.

."Om Tare Tutare Ture Mama Ayurpunye Jnana Putin Kuru Svaha"
~Sita Tara Mantra

ColorMeGone2's picture

It really, really is. We gotta share more of these positive stories. We all focus so much on the negative. I mean, yeah, that's what this site is for, but we could all use some good vibes, too, and being positive gets us so much more than being negative does. I really admire you for all you do for your SD, but also because you're just such a special person. You have a beautiful soul!

♥ ANNE 8102 ♥

sam's picture

Disrespect is the word that comes to mind when i read your blog.You will never trust him as long as you are being treated this way it will always linger over your head and make you miserable.If a couple separate it is to separate and if that person has a girlfriend /boyfriend those are the ones you have to make happy not the ex afterall that is why people separate.So it should be more business like when they communicate not all giddy when they talk to eachother or about eachother.I would be very cautious on how you look at your future with this man.