Does anyone have worksheets or projects to help a new stepmother with young children?
I am recently engaged to a wonderful father of two, sd6 & ss4, who has a shared parenting agreement. The children are actually with him a majority of the time and spend every night during the school year at his house... summers are split almost 65/35 mom/dad. Anyway, prior to me, the mother wanted little to do with her children... only when convenient to her. When I moved in, her interest in her children increased dramatically... as can be expected, as did her jealousy and unkind words. Mind you she cheated on my fiance and they were divorced for nearly 2 years before I ever came into the picture. Needless to say, she put a great strain on all of our relationships. So, I bought several step-mother books and step-family books to try to make all relationships better. Some, of course, work(ed) better than others. Anyway, now that we are engaged, the mother's hatred for me and her ex-husband is to the extreme and her children feel the stress. Long story short, I am looking for worksheets or projects or whatever to help my soon to be stepchildren learn to cope with their feelings. I found an excellent book, "When a Parent Marries Again: Children Can Learn to Cope with Family Change (Paperback"
by Marge Heegaard. My soon-to-be sd loves it! I am hoping to find more worksheets/books/activities to help the children understand what is going on and that their feelings are ok. This is hard enough on the adults, I cannot imagine being a child and going through it. Any adive?? Or know of any good websites with these kinds of worksheets/information? Thanks!
Go to ..
www.ask.com
They have alot of free projects that you can print out!
Just type in the subject your interested in.
hangingin
thanks!
thank you soo much for your help!
new_gf
Your welcome,
as for the advice part, just keep on coming to this site for your own self preservation,I have just recently found it and it has been a really great help to me! I feel stronger just knowing I can come here for advice, where as, if I went to my husband about HIS kids,and sometimes even our own son, he would get defensive. This way no one is judging me for "thinking out loud" about how much of a bitch my SD is getting to be...and so on...This place is really wonderful,I just wish it had existed or I had known about it earlier on...sayyyy about even 13 years ago.
hangingin
Welcome!
Your situation sounds EXACTLY like mine....
When I met my DH, I went crazy on gathering information for blending families.... dealing with an ex wife.... his ex sounds EXACTLY like your boyfriend's ex....
In fact, I found this site over a year ago when I Googled "how to deal with a psycho ex wife"!
There is a lot of information out there.... I'm an internet junkie and so I literally search the web for info.
"Don't be distracted by criticism. Remember, the only taste of success some people ever have is when they take a bite out of you."
Thanks!
As comforting as it is to know that I'm not alone and there are others out there going through the exact same things, it saddens me that people really do have to go through this. I'm totally with you! I am an internet junkie and have been desperately searching the web for new ways to allow my stepchildren to express their emotions without repercussions. You see, as their mother still pretends I do not exist, even after 14 months and an engagement ring, the children are not allowed to openly express their feelings about me or their father to their mother. As the kids are so young... 4 & 6, they are incredibly confused by all of this. We constantly reassure them that they are allowed to love and like whomever they choose... to listen to their hearts. Anyway, I will definitely continue visiting this site and searching for more ways to help my stepkids learn to cope.
HA!
I googled the EXACT same thing. That's how I found this site too! That is the funniest thing I have heard all day!
Sounds like you are taking the right steps New_GF. Gather all the info you can find and use what applies to your situation. No two blended familes are the same... so it is hard to have cold hard facts, or worksheets... but having a support group has been helpful for a lot of us here. We share the frustrations and the JOYS, so don't let the negativity you may read at first scare you. It's just us, venting and using one another as a sounding board.
Daddys Gurl
It's Better To Have Loved And Lost, Than To Have Spent The Rest Of My Life With THAT PSYCHO!!!!
Too funny...
I googled "my husband's ex-wife is insane!"
Not entirely helpful but I did find a website...
it's a start.
http://www.childrenafterdivorce.com/divorce/default.asp
Projects!
Hello! I am new to the site and just looking around. My BF has a five year old daughter. I'm not sure if this is helpful at all, it probably isn't going to help heal any pain the kids are going through, but it might help you bond and keep the kids busy but I found this website http://www.kaboose.com/ and found it really helpful! They have tons of arts and crafts and video games for kids of all ages. I live in New Jersey and here we have craft stores like Michaels and AC Moore, not sure where you're from, but they always have cheap art projects there. Hope to have helped a bit.
and by the way i googled "oh, my God please help me she's nuts." but i didn't come up with anything LOL!