So sorry lorlors- this is a shitty thing that DH has done- but maybe you can have a word with the staff that no one is allowed near without your approval- after all you are the one giving birth here. Take charge!

Personally, I would be so angry with DH that I would ban him too, especially as you have gone through hell trying to conceive this child.

Some men can be so tactless- the first time I ever spoke to XOSD was when TheX put her on the phone to me minutes after she had given birth to twins. I never forgot that indiscretion on his part.

I hope you get your way on this- and that the birth is trouble free for all concerned. 

You can  absolutely give a list of people that are allowed in the room with you. You are the patient, not your DH. It would suck to have things go down like that but you can have the staff remove them.

The other option- my favorite with having 2 C-sections myself, was to have a cue with my nurse. She would come in and kick everyone out of the room to "check my incisions" and then it was meds and bed for me- no if ands or butts- if you didn't make this baby it is time to leave. -- 2 nurses, 2 hospitals, in 2 states hooked me up like that! It was awesome. So 15 mins with people that would stop by and the nurse would come in and kick them out and make it look like it was doctors orders, nothing about me!

SD just said ‘can I hang around you guys on the 9the 

It's time for SD to learn that storks do not bring babies. You don't hang around waiting for it to be dropped off

It's time for both DH and SD to learn that having a baby is not a spectator sport, and that people do not "hang around" with the mom during a delivery (scheduled or not).

I'd tell DH that he has a choice. He can hang around with SD or he can be there with me. And he better make the right choice. 

And I'd remind him that a caesarean is surgery and you will need time before you have anyone but him see you at the hospital. Mothers need to rest, need quiet, after a delivery.

Yes, he wants to show off the baby to the steps. But, the steps don't have to meet the baby immediately. They can wait 24 hours. 

No no and NO. Tell DH you already told him no skids. There’s no “hanging around.” This makes me so angry for you! If he doesn’t say anything I would tell them myself, very clearly.

Go find some really really gory birth videos and make SD watch them. Tell her that will substitute for her watching the real deal. 

Is it possible she just forgot the date?

heck no that is not happening. You are  not going to feel like having company the day you have a c section. He needs to put you first. he will have to suck it up and tell the kids no.

I totally get not wanting to be around SD during your hospital stay.  But I also think if skids are excited to meet their new sibling, why would you discourage that?  She’s old enough to sit in the waiting room.  If you want DH with you, make it clear he stays to entertain you, and he can get snacks and something for SD to do while she waits.

When I saw your blog title, I laughed and wondered what man does not have rocks in his head - at least at one time or the other...

OMG, no. Just NO!! You need to tell your DH in no uncertain terms that you do not want the skids around at the hospital or around at the time of your baby's delivery - and he had better respect and comply with that instruction. Excuse my polite language, but WTF??!! You do not need added stress and you do not want the skids around, What is so hard to understand about that? I do not understand why you can not be granted some time that is special to ONLY  you, your husband and new born child.
I get so annoyed that skids need to be cow-towed to when people expressed CLEAR wishes  to  the contrary.

Being with a man who has a family from a previous marriage is tough at the start. All your exciting firsts come with thoughts of your love experiencing it with another woman. It takes years to not care about that.

i get it... you want your day to just be thoughts of you, your new baby and his Dad. Just a day or two when step world is on pause. A day or two after you can roll up your sleeves and tackle blendeded family drama.

Even when i gave birth to our 1st child, ss 17 had told dad he wanted to come (he’s never cared about me, our kids yet alone acknowledged us), hubbys sis and brother that we’re close with and always help us out just wanted to visit with their adult kids for a short while and hubby knew self centred ss would have come, hubbys family arrive and mins after ss arriving that he’d in front of family rudely tell hubby to hurry up and go home. Next day he came he asked dad which baby out of the 2 was ours (we’re in an asian country, there were 2 patients- i’m the only caucasian), hubby looked at him like seriously??

next child he simply did not come and was not welcome. After all the shit i’ve put up with him, hubby knew me with emergency csection that entertaining him was not a priority. Got home and he never gave a stuff

stand your ground proudly mumma!! Some men are just so heartless and how he’s bowed to the stepkids going against your wishes, my hubby did that a few times and believe me he was put back in his place, he claimed he didn’t realise he was doing somethibg wrong so i told him “as the woman who carried these kids for almost 10 months, vomited daily several times, incredible pain throughout pregnancy and childbirth, what i say pertaining to my kids goes!! Your kids with ex or other family/in-laws never take precedence over me as whatever i say has veto power!!”

that sorted him out pretty quick

my dad believes ss only wanted to come to see he competition... since when did new siblings from a parents new marriage get seen as competition instead of just family

Don’t you just love that we have no rights that need to be respected while the steps potential feelings are the holy grail. Take care of yourself. Explain to the nurses and doctors privately the circumstance and they can probably advise that this is not a good idea. Then you can just look at your spouse and say “see told you so!” You should not have this stress now! I am so sorry!!!  Best wishes for an easy procedure and a beautiful baby that is radiantly healthy! Let’s hope your spouse learns to respect you as you deserve! I still struggle to be treated as an equal! Hugs!

When DD was born BM called my hospital room for all the details. Dumba$$ told her. I am still not over it and DD is 14.  Do what you need to do. I sure wish I could have kicked him. (((Hugs)))

I had 2 from previous marriage and he had SD from previous relationship before we had DD together.  Out of spite, SD's BM cut DH out of most of her pregnancy, then the birth and first 4 months of SD's life until court intervened - so DH was never able to experience birth of a child.  Our DD was his first and it was a C-section since my previous 2 were c-sections.  This was all new to him.  

I did NOT want SD ever to come to the hospital even though she was 4 at the time.  Luckily, she was sick at the time and I told him under no uncertain terms was she allowed to be there because she was sick with a cough and snotty nose.  My ignorant MIL still asked repeatedly about bringing her and I told DH a clear NO.  

As awful as it sounds, I was extremely thankful the stepbrat was sick and unable to come to the hospital even though my ex-MIL brought my older two (She was a great MIL).  In fact, the current MIL tried to let stepbrat hold DD the day we came home from the hospital and I about flipped.  This went on for over 2 weeks and I informed the MIL that stepbrat was at doctor and on antibiotics for start of pneumonia and they weren't sure if bacterial or viral, so why in god's name would I let her next to a newborn?!

I hope that you are blessed enough to have a quiet and uneventful birth of your baby and allowed to enjoy it before the stepbrats swarm.  Prayers your way!!