IN A BAD MOOD
Well SD9 BM is prego! She texted DH yesterday, to inform him that she was. Like he cares but of course he said congrats. She will know what she is having late July. ( I have not clue about times on anything but I would think she is not very far along.)
SD9 is excited (for now). So was other SD when her BM was prego now they are struggling worse then ever, and SD13 is upset cause the new baby gets all the attention.
Why am I upset about this? I honestly shouldnt care it has nothing to do with me.
But BM lives with her parents, works maybe 15 hours a week. Now she is prego I am sure she will quit like last time, it was to hard on her. Has no savings or money for anything SD wants. If her parents won't buy it she is after DH to pay. It drives me nuts! Now she is having another kid! Come on, grow up and get it together.
DH said it won't affect his CS at all, and it shouldn't but BM not knowing who the new daddy is may. WIll it though?
I am just in a bad mood, their bad decisions always seem to affect us some how. I get it DH does not have to do anything extra but he can't just watch his kids go without the basics they need. Even though CS should cover them.
Your state may be different
Your state may be different but in our's BM could go have 10 more kids with 10 different men and it wouldn't impact what my partner has to pay at all. Our state doesn't care about BM at all really.
They look at what my partner makes and how many children he has to support and that's what she gets.
They also don't care if I'm in the picture or if we have any joint children unless he were then having to pay child support to me (or another BM) then first BM still gets everything she's owed and second gets the full amount she would be owed too.
I understand the chain
I understand the chain reaction of this development. And I think you're right to be thinking ahead of the ripple effects. It certainly won't make things easier, cheaper or less complicated.
Man, I feel sorry for kids of these people who are so ill prepared for parenthood. They are born behind the ball and have to work that much harder to get a fair shake at anything in life.
Hang in there. It could be worse. It doesn't sound as if it's likely to be twins
thank you
BM tried to pull the whole lets try to be best friends with DH this weekend. SD9 really wants to see you, why don't you come over and hang out with "us".
BM is all about if she isn't happy no one else can be, so she text me to tell me that she hopes I understand that DH will have to help her alot more now. My response wasn't very nice I was in a great mood until her.
I pretty much told her DH will do what he needs to for his child, that she needs to move on find some one who will put up with her crap cause we are done with it. And she is hurting SD more then she is anyone else. If she wants to be this selfish go ahead but we are done with her games.
she hopes I understand that
she hopes I understand that DH will have to help her alot more now.
Why on Earth would DH have to help her a lot more now? Her having another baby is HER problem and her responsibilities to SD remain the same.
She doesn't even know who the father is?
It will likely make little
It will likely make little difference in DH's CS... at least officially. If your DH can stand his ground and not give the breeder BM one penny beyond the CS (and any other COd items) it should be transparent to your side of the blended family equation.
The courts do not take well to parents living under a Custody/Visitation/Support order breeding out of wedlock and for sure do not take kindly to them quitting their jobs. DH needs to be ready to request an imputed income against BM if she tries to go after him for more CS. My SS's SpermIdiot tried all of this kind of crap while he was breeding his way to studliness with every semi-willing underage womb he could find. My SS is the eldest of his four all out of wedlock spawn by three different baby mamas. He worked part time instead of full time, he worked under the table cash plumbing jobs, he lived in SpermGrandHag's rental property rent free and drove the SpermGrandHag and SpermGrandPa's hand me down beater cars all under the mistaken belief that he could get out of or at least minimize his CS obligation.
So we went MBA research on his useless ass and nailed him... it took me 9 years to convince my wife to finally go for a CS amendment. She was always worried that they would take it out on SS during visitation if she did. When I finally quit biting me tongue and gave her clarity that they were taking it all out on the kid anyway she got pissed and took ownership of their toxic asses. Based on our research the court imputed an fair income for a licensed plumber on th SpermIdiot and his CS went from $133/mo to $785/mo.
DH needs to keep impeccable records, journals, and call logs (record the calls from BM if it is legal to do so in your state) and always be prepared to nail her ass to the wall in court.
When we rolled out the living arrangements and financial support that the SpermIdiot was enjoying the Judge was very interested to hear that the DipShitiot was living rent free in his parent's rental property, they were paying his CS for him, and was particularly interested in the Private Investigator report and video of him taking under the table cash plumbing jobs as a way to minimize his reported income in order to keep his CS down.
So the BM in your situation may just find that her life choices won't fly very well with a Judge. Her leeching off of her mommy and daddy, part time work, etc, etc, etc.... should do nicely to bare her ass in front of the Judge. However, birth order is a definate thing for Family Law Courts. BMs having SDs before you and DH had your own children makes the Skids priority for money until they age out from under the CO. In the SpermIdiot's case... my SS being his eldest gave SS a far larger % of SpermClan income than his three younger half sibs. While there is some accomodation for further non joint children in the Income Shares CS model used by the states (Except for DE) birth order gives a significant advantage.
Good luck. And have fun shredding her in court.