Starting the week off with PAS and lots of Crazy
Skids came yesterday, but during the day (and all wknd really) DH and Crazy were arguing back and forth on OFW about Dr. appt's for SD13. There are SO many- literally 1-2/week, and managing them is insane. When DH says he will see what day works for him to schedule an appt, Crazy replies with "Use vacation to take your daughter to her appts!!! You don't even care about her appts!". DH is in manufacturing- he has to find someone to work for him either way, and normal people try to schedule appt's so they don't have to use vacation! And he can, he just has to switch with people.
SS16 was supposed to just bring SD with him to our house, but like usual didn't listen and came without her. Crazy messaged DH saying SS "will not be coming back to pick SD up, it's DH's job". So DH ignored that and sent SS back to pick up SD like he was supposed to originally. Lol. SD went right to her room, DH went up shortly after to talk to her and see how her first date ever went on Sat, and SD was balled up on her bed with her back turned, refusing to look at or talk to DH. He told her if she didn't turn around and talk to him he would take her phone, so he did. She came down later and did her chore, I asked what was wrong and she wouldn't tell me. DH tried to talk to her again- Nothing. He said, ok, I have to take SS's car for a test drive, so you're coming with. 20 mins later they are back and DH fills me in on why she was mad at him (with SD still there). He had to guess at the reason to get her to talk. Apparently Crazy inolved SD in the OFW messages, except she told SD that DH said he was "Never going to take a vacation day or any time off period for SD's appts, and he was never going to any of SD's appts again". That she's not important enough to him to do that. And, that SD's therapist was "rude to her", so she now doesn't like SD's therapist and wants SD to get a new therapist. She also tried to tell SD that her therapist was the same therapist that SS16 and Crazy's other daughter had when they were young, and she was rude to Crazy then too. Except...none of that is true. Literally everything she told SD is a flat-out lie. SD even pointed out that she saw the same therapist as SS when they were young and this isn't the same person. It is really just mind-blowing the things this psycho will do and say.
So DH explained what really happened with the messages, and told SD she shouldn't even know what is being talked about on OFW- it's not for her to be involved in. But since she was already involved and mad at DH for it, he also showed her the messages from yesterday so she could see exactly what was said, and that he did NOT say the things Crazy said he did. Once SD saw the messages she was 100% back to normal. But the way she believed Crazy and her PAS is unreal. We all had a good talk and at bedtime she came and gave both of us a hug and kiss, which never happens lately. (If i'm around, only DH gets one. If DH isn't around, then I get one. We can't figure it out) DH said to me, we are probably the best parents on the planet. He is all feeling good, happy with how things went. Which I get, and I felt better also, but I also felt overstimulated and drained from it all. I told him that I don't bounce back from the drama quite as fast as he does because I don't have bio-glasses on, and to his credit I could see him trying to put himself in my shoes and he said he can understand that.
NOW- SD has a counseling appt. right now that also was supposed to involve the parents to set up a "game plan" for when/if SD makes suicidal statements in the future. The counselor emailed Crazy asking if I should come- Crazy actually said yes. Then emailed the Counselor a few days later saying she doesn't want me there. DH emailed yesterday (He meant to last week but forgot) saying I would be attending, and the Counselor left a VM today saying I can't come without Crazy's permission. Are you f'ng kidding me??? She is NUTS, and she is calling the shots??? I'm so pissed. Crazy has sent DH message after message saying "TrueNorth doesn't attend SD's appts, she doesn't care about SD, blah blah blah".Aand no, I'm not going to SD's Dr. appt's because DH has it covered and I'm sure as shit not going to see Crazy there. But this is important. And she blocks me from coming. It is mind-boggling that a SM isn't allowed to come unless BM says so.
The upside is now I don't have to spend Valentine's day with that dumb box.