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In today's episode of "Messages from Crazy"

TrueNorth77's picture

I posted a little while ago about how we have completely had it with Crazy's antics and constant messaging on thej OFW app, completely ignoring the communication guidelines we put in place specifically to shut her up. It is just not sustainable for 5yrs til SD is 18, and DH will be filing for Contempt (setting expectations low). The holdup is that, in true DH fashion, he lost the entire CO somehow, and he needs to get a copy of it to reference the exact reasons for contempt.

He had responded to one of Crazy's messages before our trip with "see you in court". She wrote again days later about something else that was not necessary and he responded that this app needed to get back to it's original intended use- necessary communication only. I wish he wouldn't respond at all, but at least he is showing he's trying to get it back on track. 

Yesterday- She sent a message about SD's orthadontist appt. that DH took her to on Tuesday (SD got braces), and railed at DH about how he didn't send Crazy an after-care summary from the Dentist like he's supposed to (there wasn't one), and "why do we even use this app at all if you can't communicate about simple things? You put a braces tightening appt. on the calendar on OFW that's on my time, but are you planning on taking her or do I need to take off work? You are awful at everything and this is all documented", blah blah blah, on and on, and then the best part..."you are in Contempt of Court"! LOL. I just can't with her. So because DH mentioned he was going to file for Contempt of Court, she thinks if she tries to accuse him of things he did "wrong" on the app (further proving DH's case, btw, by not sticking to the communication guidelines), and then say he's in Contempt of Court, that somehow when the messages are reviewed, DH will be in Contempt of Court. I honestly have never met anyone dumber in my life. He didn't even respond. An hour later she sent another message about how DH "lost 5 of SD's pills while we were on our trip", and he can't even take care of her medicine and now she doesn't have enough for when she comes back to our house and DH will need to order more, and you don't even watch SD take her meds, blah blah blah. TWICE on the trip when SD was taking her meds, she dropped a pill and lost it. Which is ridiculous, she is old enough to hold onto pills and not repeatedly drop them after taking them for almost 10 years, but either way, we don't sit there and watch her take her meds (neither does Crazy), and even if he did, what would he have done, seen she was dropping the pill and dove at the pill like a fricking ninja and caught it in mid-air? Crazy seems to think DH should be mouth-feeding them to SD like a baby bird. Mostly, she just twists any situation into DH doing something wrong, and then uses OFW as a way to criticize him and try to make him look bad. (I honestly think she thinks people are reguarly monitoring these messages, but that only her accusations against DH matter). 

She then called him "Puffy face" at the end of the message like a 3rd grader (we're assuming she saw pics from our trip, and that was her mad burn at DH). *lol* 

The good part was that when DH took SD to the Ortho, she started talking to him about depression and asking questions, and said she can't talk to Crazy about this because Crazy dismisses it and says "all girls her age feel that way", and won't do anything. Which is obvious because WHILE DH was receiving the ridiculous messages from Crazy on OFW, he also got a call from the psychologist's office that DH set up an appt. for SD with, saying Crazy had called them and "the appt. was on her time and she was going to be working, so she wanted DH to reschedule and set up an appt. on his time". ARE YOU SERIOUS??? Your daughter has been talking about suicide, this is the soonest appt. we could get (August) and you are trying to reschedule a VIRTUAL appt. that DH was going to attend virtually also (Crazy doesn't have to be there and we were hoping she wouldn't be) to a later date for no reason?? DH said, no this is virtual and I will be on the call also. They said that was fine. Unbelievable. When DH and SD got home from the ortho, it was around noon and DH said once SS was up and ready in a few mins, SS would probably drive them to Crazy's for their week there. SD said, Oh, well I don't mind staying here til this afternoon if SS wants to. Which is nice, and nothing she ever says. She's always so ready to go to Crazy's. But also, it's time to go girl! 8 days with 6 of them being spent completely together is enough for me. They left shortly after. 


goldengoat's picture

I'm sure it'd be much easier to laugh if you weren't having to deal with so much drama, though.  

Crazy seems like an absolute child.  While I'm very sad for my SS19 that his mother jetted out without a second thought for him, I'm sooo glad DH nor I ever had to deal with anything like this.  

It's sweet that your SD is coming around to wanting to spend time with y'all!  But I feel you on needing it to end, too!  LoL  

I hope this all works out your way with the court stuff!

TrueNorth77's picture

Man talk about choosing the lesser of 2 evils- no BM in the picture at all = Full Time skid. Or dealing with this nonsense. It's lose/lose. I am so over the drama though, that's for sure. I can't imagine 5 more years of this. It's inconceivable. 

justmakingthebest's picture

I just can't even deal with the incessant need to by so HC. It is EXHAUSTING! Why put that much stress on yourself?

SD went to a "Braces tightening appointment"- logic would say, she got her braces tightened. It isn't rocket science! I never get an after visit summary from a dentist, or even PCP unless there are specific instructions for care. 

As for losing 5 pills, with the way BM is acting I would turn it around and say that he counted them when she got there and when she left all the pills were accounted for. BM must be either lying or throwing them away to create a problem that wasn't there. She can't prove it either way!

TrueNorth77's picture

Skids went by Crazy Tue at noon- pills for her house for the week get sorted into containers AT Crazy's. She tried telling DH that Tuesday evening's pills were messed up. He's like, um...that's on you then, they are sorted at your house for Tue night! She replied with "ASK SD", and that's when she called him puffy face. LOL

SD actually just got the braces put on on Tues- but there is a tightening appt. set up for later. All DH needs to do is put it on the calendar- if it's on her time, she needs to take SD or reschedule- it's simple, no need for a message about it. He's doing what he's supposed to. And either way, the Ortho still didn't send an after-care summary via email, except a sheet that DH sent with SD to Crazy's house! So she HAD a sheet with simple care instructions- there was no big emailed "after-care summary" like with a surgery. But she felt the need to send a message anyway, even though DH provided literally everything he had been given. 

I don't get the need to be so HC for no reason all the time either, except she has zero things in her life to distract her. No BF, no social life, no friends or hobbies at all. Literally nothing. It seems like such a sad existence. And she is definitely jealous of what we have and a hateful, negative person in general. I couldn't imagine living a day inside her brain. It must be miserable in there. 

NotYourAverageStepMama's picture

Don't you just love it when these HCBMs grasp at straws to try and stay relevant and have an excuse to send a message?

When your DH gets a copy of the CO, he should scan it and have a digital copy hand that way he can reference it whenever or send it if he ever has to. 

TrueNorth77's picture

I hadn't actually thought of that for some reason, but that's a really good idea! Otherwise it will sit on our counter for infinity because DH will never find a spot to put it, until it eventually gets lost again. lol. 

Completely exhausting! She must know that attacking me will really push DH over the edge, so she's now focusing on him solely (it used to be 75% attacking me). 

NotYourAverageStepMama's picture

because then you can reference it easily. Plus if you ever have to send it for medical or school reasons, it is already a pdf on the computer to send off. Since BM doesn't like to list DH on any and all paperwork, we had to send it out at least 5 times. Now that BM has moved to another state, we will have to do it all over again probably. DH sent a message today to BM actually as "a friendly reminder" to list him on all of SD's new paperwork for school and medical so he doesn't have to jump through hoops this year to gain acess. Let's see if she actually does it.