I've been with my bf for 2yrs and SD5 comes over EOW. At first my bf always used to pick up and drop off SD from BMs house but in the last 6-7 months BM keeps asking my bf to pick her up from different places (her friends, her grandads, the shops, basically where ever BM is). At first it wasnt a problem and bf didnt mind but lately its happening every time we pick her up and BM only calls about 30mins before we're supposed to pick SD up! A few weeks ago my bf car wasnt working so he called BM and asked her to drop SD over (he even offered her petrol money!!) but she said no she couldnt be bothered so we had to get a bus then a train there and back..he has only ever asked her to drop SD over twice in 2yrs and both times she cant be bothered.

So this weekend surprise surprise BM called asking us to pick SD up from a friends, my bf said no because BM cant be bothered to do the same in return. He told BM to call him when she gets home and he will pick SD up from her house...by 10pm BM still hadnt called so my bf called her, she said she wont be home until late so bf asked if he could pick SD up in the morning, she created a big argument over this calling my bf selfish (wtf?!) then eventually agreed we can pick her up in the morning.

So at 10.30 we turned up to get her and BM was still in bed, SD wasnt dressed, hadnt had any breakfast etc so we had to wait outside for 30minutes for BM to get SD ready. When we dropped SD back at 5, we were 10minutes late because of the traffic...BM started shouting saying she was waiting to go out. In the end my bf said from now on he's only going to pick and drop SD off at her house...is this reasonable?

My other concern is what if EOW BM deliberately is not at home when we go to pick SD up meaning bf will have to pick her up in the morning everytime so she doesnt stay over...this clearly isnt fair on either SD or my bf but I dont see why bf should have to back down to BM.

Advice please x