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I HATE the BM!

Sweetness's picture

I just need to vent. It's been quite a few months since I've used the site but anyway, the situation is sticky.

First of all my boyfriend has a step-son to his ex-wife-to-be and a daughter. And secondly he has two daughters to a previous girlfriend. Long story + Big mistakes.

Basically, I met my current b/f through my ex. My ex was pretty much cheating on me and encouraging the now boyfriend to talk to me and hang out while the ex was off galavanting around with other women.

Anyway, turns out we got along like a house on fire and one thing led to another. However he was still "married" but filing for divorce as his marriage hadn't been working out for a few years and they'd been to all sorts of counseling and were unable to sort out their issues. The BM was initially going to move out but it was easier if the boyfriend did.

Anyway, so we got together and moved in with each other and then the BM refused to sign the divorce papers and now she wants to get back together because her Church has told it's the wrong thing to do - even though she was so adamant earlier on about divorce and moving out and this had happened on quite a few occasions.

Then to make matters worse, my ex suddenly decided that he "cared" and wanted to stir up some trouble so went around to boyfriend's ex-wife-to-be's house and told her all this garbage about me and my past. Apparently I have a really aggressive streak, swear and shouldn't be trusted around children, etc. The boyfriend and I had been having an affair. My sister is deaf, my uncle was an alcoholic, etc. Things that are completely irrelevant anyway.

Now BM seems to think she knows me, that I am a whore and that I am to blame for the demise of her marriage. That I am a bad influence and shouldn't be allowed near the kids. It just really pisses me off because (without sounding cocky) I know that the children enjoy hanging out with me more - because I actually make time to do things with them and play around with them. But BM is too busy worrying about image and too much of an uptight prude to goof around!!

So now she is trying to compete with me for the affections of b/f's other two older girls. She's 10 years older than me and she acts like a child. She is always acting on emotions and is completely irrational, she never thinks about the kids and how her actions may be affecting them. Grrrr.. it does my head in!!

She is trying to stop boyfriend from spending time with the kids on the weekend because she "misses them" or because she wants "to take them out on the weekend." What a load of shit! We now have boyfriend's step-son every second weekend because she wanted to spend time with him. So last weekend we'd planned to take all the girls to the museum.. and GUESS WHAT.. we actually drove past BM.. she was walking home from the grocery store and boy was she pissed.. She raced home as quickly as possible, busted in the door and rang b/f's phone straight away. "Did you just come to my house?, Did you pick up SS?", she asked. Um, what the.. did you not even check if your own son was home before calling us?!?!?! Obviously not, because she rushed home and got straight on the blower. So what does she do, she calls us about 6 times while we're trying to enjoy a nice day out and boyfriend is trying to spend time with his three daughters!!!

She treats the kids like shit, she never pays them attention, her son is 13 and is as timid as an abused animal! He is too scared to walk up to the shops because she treats him like a baby. She is a control freak!! She doesn't want him to see Harry Potter because she thinks it will take away from his Christianity!

Bottom line: She is a freakin' basket case! I just can't believe adults act like this. She is 32/33yrs old - GROW UP!!!!!!! :O

What a vent!

Comments

Chocoholic's picture

My sk's bm is the same way.... she "heard" all about me as well and I am "child abuser" a "druggie" and an "alcoholic" oh and I "lost custody" of my bio kids.... yep, she really knows me!
She also tries to compete for the kids affections, but she is trying to compete for her own kids affections! As soon as she saw that her kids love me and that I am better mom than she will ever be she began this big one sided competition vying for the kid's love and attention.... its really pathetic....

Sweetness's picture

It is so pathetic. B/F stands up for me. He always stops the conversation as soon as she brings my name up and always reminds her that the breakdown of their marriage had nothing to do with me whatsoever!

It just pisses me off. I'm young (23) and I thought I left this sort of stuff behind when I left high school 5 years ago. And here I am with adults - my ex being 25 and b/f's ex, 32 acting like children.

It is pathetic because BM is competing with me for her own daughter's affections + her son and b/f's two older girls and she can't even do that right! LOL! What does she do, she tries and fails miserably to reduce b/f's time with his daughters! You'd think she could at least start paying them some attention - maybe try bonding with them, getting to know them, you know!!!

But anyway, I guess I'll just try to ignore her and not let her badmouthing me, get to me.