There's a lot of talk on this site about guilty parenting... guilty fathers, etc.
Do I believe in guilty parenting? YES
Do I think that there is a higher percentage of stepparents on this site that deal with significant others who are guilty parents? YES, this site definitely seems to attract Stepparents that need a place to vent and look for advice, so YES.
Do I think that our perception of guilty parenting is correct? NO... not always, I have to say.
I do think that some of our spouses / SO's are guilty of guilty parenting!! I do! But not always.
Not every single thing they do for their kid is a result of their guilty parenting, or is motivated by guilt, spoiling etc. Sometimes that is just the parent they are (whether that be to their child with BM or that be to any children they may have.)
I don't think that these parents are always at fault of guilty parenting any more than I believe that every time I get pissed off at SD it's because I am jealous of her and / or BM, I am feeling out of control in my situation, I don't understand because I don't have my own children, etc.
Sometimes I'm just pissed off at SD because she did something that, in my opinion, is messed up!!
So ladies, I guess the only thing that I would like to impart today (because I have seen a lot of the guilty parent subject come up lately) is to try to remember that EVEN IF your spouse/s.o. IS a guilty parent... not everything they do is motivated by that. To assume it is, or to just write off their actions under that umbrella, to me, is like saying about ourselves... that because we are stepparents we always have "evil" motivations.