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SS11 Failing school....again

StepKat's picture

SS11 and his drama. I swear this child is 100% his mother in every way. He's narcissistic, condescending, rude, a know-it-all, obnoxious, self-centered, disrespectful, a pathological liar and a nasty attitude from hell. He can’t figure out that it’s not what you say but how you say it. He will argue with anyone about anything because in his mind he’s never wrong and he MUST correct everyone else, including his teachers. His attitude and mouth get him in more trouble than anything else. We understand that he’s ADHD, but so am I. Therefore, he’s not going through anything special.

Here’s the story. DH had to go to a parent teacher conference with BM last Friday because SS11 is failing school (he was already held back in the first grade for the same exact issues). The problems are he refuses to do his work, will not focus (that’s the ADHD), argues and fights with the teachers and refuses to do as he is told. When DH and I discussed these issues before the parent teacher conference I told him that maybe SS11 should be put back on his ADHD meds. Sadly that will never happen because it’s too much of an inconvenience for BM to have to take him to the doctor every three months for the meds. When he was on the meds (before she learned about the every three month doctor visits) he was doing a lot better.

Well, the school recommend that SS11 be placed in a special edu program. I think it’s called individualized education plan. He won’t be in special ed classes but instead he will have special ed teachers that will accompany him in all his classes. They will be there to “talk” to SS11 to make sure he behaves and provide tutoring. The tutoring is a great idea! The special ed teacher will also be there to talk to SS11 when he acts up. DH told me that the school explained the teacher has special training on how to get a kid like SS11 to stop arguing and do as he’s told. I’m thinking they need to share that with the rest of us LOL.

He will also have to turn in any hand written assessments in cursive. This is another idea I really like! SS11 is also dyslexic (again, so I am lol) and cursive writing doesn’t give the brain a chance to get letters backwards like regular print would. Any assessments that are not required to be hand written he’ll be able to type on a computer, which is a good idea (as long as he doesn’t think is play time).

The next plan of action really burns me up. Not because of anything to do with SS11 but with public schools as a whole. Their main concern is making sure SS11 can pass those stupid state and federal tests. I do not agree with focusing education on those tests! It stops teachers from actually teaching students. Instead they are force feeding students what they need just to pass some standardized test so the school can get money. SS11 is going to be given extra time to take these tests and his special ed teacher will be allowed to speak to him to make sure he stays focused on the test. In public school EVERYTHING revolves around those tests and it will ruin a child’s learning.

I’m not sure if all of this Plan will improve his horrible personality traits or not, but hopefully it will improve his education.


robin333's picture

It sounds like the school is really trying to help. I hope it does. Be sure to share if you find out about that special training.

wife number 2's picture

My SS was failing school from elementary through almost 10th grade. He had an individual talent plan, an aid to help him "read" his tests (explained: not to do the tests for him, but help him understand the written words since he isn't a good reader). The boy wasn't mouthy or troublesome, just lazy. His mom is uneducated so she never encouraged or forced SS to apply himself in school.

He failed every state test. His grades were all E's and D's. In our public school system, the parent (custodial) has the final say if the child is held back or not. Mom didn't want him held back so he continued getting pushed through the system. Every year he was further behind.

The boy is graduating this year on schedule. He is not educated and will not be attending college. I feel bad for him but this is his and his mom's fault. They can deal with his lack of education together.

So, if my SS is graduating, any kid can! The state tests meant nothing and had no ill-effect whatsoever with his graduating requirements. He also was missing a specific credit, so the school just added it to his transcript. Isn't that the direction most public schools are heading? Are you sure the state tests mean anything in your district?