What is with BM's?
I do not understand how the BM in my situation, just told my bf last week how he "is still a terrible person" and goes on and on playing victim of all the things my bf has "done" to her, but then still has on her facebook photos of him and her, photos of him and the children, an album of their wedding photos, says on her page how "my hubby and my girls are my motivation," but she doesn't have a hubby, she has an ex hubby, plus her page says "single" and changed her name to her maiden name for her profile... If you really feel the way that you claim, then why do you still have those photos and such up? Is it because you feel powerful and think I or whoever is with your ex husband will get upset or jealous that they are still up? The children are under 6 so it's not like it's for them to see.
Anyways, that is my rant today, I just don't get it and wish she would take it down, but I would never say anything to bf or try and get her to take them down, it just would make her feel in control and like she is winning. However, my bf looks miserable in all the pics, so thank you for showing me that my bf was truthful about not wanting to marry her.
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BM in my life's FB was always
BM in my life's FB was always a trip (she's pretty inactive now). Posts about being a "strong, independent woman who don't need no man" while she hasn't survived a day without some form of welfare, hasn't bought her own vehicle maybe ever, has had to ask both her XHs for cash or help in some form, and has had a revolving door of men for quite some time.
She'd also post some Jesus-y mantra (not actual scripture, but some "My God is a lion so tremble before me, Satan" crap) while I'd know full well that she was cheating on her husband or committing fraud against the government or being disrespectful to her mother.
Speaking of GBM, she has herself listed as a widow on her FB page. Fun fact: BM's father divorced GBM about 10 years before he died, and GBM never dated or remarried after he left. Let that delusion sink in...
Oh, and while BM doesn't have photos of DH on her FB, she did have a collage of phots on a piece of foamcore poster board (very high school) with pictures of him, her, and the kids on display in her living room. While she was married to her XH.
The cray-cray runs deep.
Oh wow!
why do these BM's act all religious? BM here does the same thing! Acts very Christian, but does all types of un-Christianlike things!
Well sounds like BM there learned the behavior from her mom! That is ridiculous!
Sounds like the cray-cray really does run deep! I wouldn't know what photos BM has up as the kids are young and my bf nor I would ever want to step foot in her home. Although she has offered my bf to come in to "talk" and he was like "no, we can talk out here," but you know my bf is the worst person ever and hurt her and x,y,z, you know typical HCBM allegations
What is it about getting
What is it about getting divorced that makes women find Jesus? My DH is ex-wife cheated on him repeatedly before and during their marriage but since she goes to church a couple times a week she always pulls that card and acts holier than thou. More than once we've been ordered to get SD home before Mass because BM makes it seem like she goes religiously. I am pretty certain she only uses it as an excuse when we have SD I guarantee you she doesn't go every single week.
The Girhippo is also a "Church Lady"
and she also posts about being a "strong, independent woman who don't need no man" who got a man the second the ink was dry on the divorce papers and gets massive CS. The brainwashed skids go on to laud her as a "strong independent woman"
Look up Borderline
Look up Borderline Personality Disorder.
She may be entirely unsavvy
She may be entirely unsavvy re social media. She doesn't remove old profile information and pictures.
I think in steplife you have to learn to take care of yourself. If it causes you anxiety/stress/anger to see things on her page? Block her.. don't look her up. Don't read those texts etc... all you are doing at that point is giving her a front row seat to causing you stress. If something makes you feel bad.. don't do it.
It takes discipline to walk away from it.. but it is the healthiest thing to do.
Yep, I blocked BM, and her
Yep, I blocked BM, and her last bf, and her current bf, and anyone else she might be associated with. I think it drives her crazy that she can't peep on our pages b/c we blocked her. For a while there she was on this tirade about how what we were posting on fb was hurting SD...even though we both had her blocked and neither of us had posted anything about SD. Coo Coo for cocoa puffs!
Why do they act all religious
Why do they act all religious?
In my opinion, it is because it is easy to use it as a shield. OH LOOKIE at meeeee, no one would suspect meeeee because I go to church and say GOD IS GOOD ALL THE TIME. Easy to blend in if you go to mega pretend churches. Easy to get money out of them tooooo.
Most folks would never ever question the validity of someones devotion to religion. HENCE easy to hide behind and FAKE IT ie it is assumed they are telling the truth and devoted.
Based on a true story.
Don't forget the patented
"All-[insert coubtry]-soccer-mom-and-girl-next-door-pillar-of-her-community-devoted-MOTY-and-all-around-wonderful-human-being-who-rose-from-the-ashes-of-divorce-like-the-proverbial-phoenix" (TM)
BM here apparently also found
BM here apparently also found the Lord through divorce. She is from a non-practicing family, was non-practicing the entire time SO had known her up until about 10 seconds after he filed for divorce.
She's also a mega pretend church attender and volunteer though unless tithing is where all of her money problems generate I don't think she throws cash at them. Her words and actions are very much not those of someone who actually understands, believes and practices the tenets of her new found religion, though. I'm sure nobody here is surprised by that.
I don't begrudge anyone their faith but it feeds right into what I know of her. It's the easiest way/least amount of effort to pretend she's her own person.
She did not exist outside of SO when they were together despite his pleas with her to basically get a life. Now if the not church church takes up all of her time and tells her how to act, how to think, how to feel she still doesn't have to put forth any real effort.
With that as her safety net (or mask, however you look at it) she is free from the risk of failure or rejection without having something/someone other than herself to lay the blame on.
Bonus, when you have a designated place for blame you can act all indignant, hypocritical and holier than thou without so much as batting an eye. She's got that part down pat.