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The Stank smelled round the world

SM12's picture

There is such a thing as too much togetherness and I believe our family has reached that point.

Tuesday night DH picks YSS up from BMs in his way home from work.   I make a quick dinner and we all sit down to eat.  As I'm eating I get a whiff of something unpleasant.  A cross between musty feet and sweat.   I immediately know it's YSS.   You can tell by his greasy hair that he hasn't showered in days.  He was sitting right next to DH so I have no idea how DH didn't smell it.  Or maby he did but didn't want to hurt poor widdle YSSs feelings.   I didn't say anything because I expected YSS to go off and play his video game and he would shower the next morning.   
 

Well Wednesday rolls around and YSS manages to sleep until 4:30pm.  I go run an errand and DH decides he wants to order take out AND we should all go.   We hop in my car and I am driving to pick up food.  Instantly I smell YSS in the back seat.   This time the odor is right behind me and strong as ever.   I am furious.   We get food, come home and I manage to stay out of smelling distance through dinner.   
The second YSS leave to play his video games I make it clear to DH he needs to handle that.   I explains how the smell makes me want to vomit and it is unacceptable to allow his kid (who is the size of a large grown man) to smell that bad. 
DH comes to bed and tells me he told YSS to shower.  That is a lie.  I heard DH tell YSS goodnight and nothing was said about bathing.   Instead DH pits a towel and clean clothes in YSS a bathroom.  I'm sure he is hoping YSS will get the hint.   
 

Why can't this kid just stay at BMs??  Seriously.  If he isn't going to bath he needs to stay there.   It has clearly been at least 4 days since he showered.   So gross.

Fingers crossed BM picks him up today and he doesn't want to "just stay" like he did last time.   
 

I swear this quarantine crap is for the birds!!

Comments

tog redux's picture

Well - this is on your DH. SS used to come over like that and DH would order him into the shower immediately. He'd sulk and pout, but he'd do it, and then he'd get over it. 

Your DH smells it. He just doesn't want to deal with it. How hard is it to tell your kid to go take a shower?

hereiam's picture

Why does your husband not tell him to get in the shower? Frankly, if my SD ever stank so bad it was making me nauseous, I would have told her to shower, myself.

I never needed to. There were times SD came over smelling like her mother's cigarette smoke and DH would immediately make her take a shower, even though it wasn't her fault that she smelled.

SM12's picture

I wanted to tell YSS myself but it seems anytime I do something like that YSS acts like I kicked his puppy and pouts for days.   I was hoping DH would handle it but of course he refuses to hurt YSSs feefees.   There will no longer be any "letting DH handle it".   I will make it a point to make YSS shower immediately and daily.  Why would anyone want their kid to be the "smelly kid"

YSS is becoming the laziest kid I ever met.   

justmakingthebest's picture

Subtlety never worked with my SS. I make big dramatic puking noises, raise a fit, basically embarrass the hell out of him. I take the phone right out of his hand if he tried to ignore me. (He is 20 but age adjusted to 13)

I rarely have to do this anymore, but it was so bad I banned him from my car for a while until his dad smelled him. Literally a sniff test because I wasn't going to sit in a confined place with nasty. 

Thumper's picture

Take a shower ...now!

No joke I would have gagged.

Nothing worse than stinky kids.

You poor woman.

TheAccidentalSM's picture

I would tell him to shower and lucky had DH's full backing.  He'd shower but then try to put his stinky clothes back on again.  *puke*

Survivingstephell's picture

This is where you have every right to complain about the air quality in your vincinity.  If DH doesn't like the way you handle it then you tell him to handle it himself.  Rinse and repeat.  It should be more painful to argue with you than make a stinky teenage boy take a shower.   

Cover1W's picture

Went through this with OSD - she just refused to clean herself or brush her teeth!  It was weird.  I finally stopped saying anything at all, just refused to be in a car with her or do things with her unless she showered.  I was hard line on those two things - only if it involved me would I say anything. 

DH finally (kinda - for a while) got it once when he picked up OSD from BMs and the stench was so bad he had to roll down the windows of the car - in the middle of winter, pull over and demand OSD bathe as soon as they set foot in the house.  It was WWIII for a while.  He had to do a similar thing when she was around 13, sitting near him on the couch.  Again, major battle.

I just let him do it.

Harry's picture

He now must shower the first thing when he comes to your house. No if and or buts .   Doesn't ( I guest not ) DH want other people think.  Six feet away may not be enough 

Dovina's picture

your SS is ensuring everyone takes the social distancing seriously Wink Start wearing your mask in the house!

Seriously, I will never understand why  parents are so afraid of their kids. Back in the good old days, it was the other way around.

Maxwell09's picture

If I were you I would tell the kid that if he can understand how to play and level up in a game then he should also understand the basic concept of human responsibility to personal hygiene. No shower, no clean breath = no games/electronics that also require brainpower.....OR y'all can make a household rule that nothing turns on (internet or phone access or whatever) until after a morning shower and teeth brushed. 

 

If you have disengaged then I would try this approach with your DH: I would tell your DH that you know that he did not confront SS about his body odor and that he is NOT being nice by ignoring his kids stink, in fact he is setting him up for an embarasing moment when someone who doesn't care about politeness calls him out-probably in front of other people and causes him humiliation-instead of doing it pivately between the two of them.