There have been issues lately with BM not telling BF things and BM flipping out because BF didn't tell her things. So I am just curious, what does BF have to tell BM. I know there is a RO in the divorce barring her from 'interfering in his personal liberties' and I am guessing that I fall under a personal liberty. BM is a major control freak so she wants to be in on everything.

She thinks of course that she has the right to know everything and has sneaky ways to get info. She also gives way too much info out on her personal life but we ignore her. What she doesn't know I have been setting her up from the start, SS6 tells BM everything so I give SS6 little bits of information and he goes back to BM and tell some big random story. So now she has no clue what is really going on and no longer believes SS6's stories. I am working on 'training' BF to not fall of her tricks too. The last time she got him she asked him if he wanted to save the tuxes for the boys from her wedding for ours, because SS6 said we were engaged. Not thinking BF blurted out no and that we were not engaged.

Now I ask because BF and I are talking about Engagement, Marriage and babies. Having read a lot of horror stories on here, I don't really want BM to know when any of those things happen. I mean I assume she will figure it out after the fact. But on BF's birthday this year, BM had a 'major' issue and called BF all weekend and it was awful. She was married to him so I know she KNEW it was his birthday weekend and that we likely had plans.

I don't want her to know when our wedding is or if I got pregnant when my due date (and trust me she would be the LAST person I would tell that I was even pregnant) because I know something would 'come up' on those dates or she would want to 'help/give advice'. And so help me god if she showed up at the church or hospital I would lose it, and yes she is dumb enough to do that. She tried to give me all sorts of help/advise when BF and I first started dating until she went off on BF about me and then still wanted to be 'friendly', I told her that I didn't like her and never to talk to me again. I talk to her now but it's a few words as possible.

BM flipped out yesterday because we went 'behind' her back and got SS4's school picture taken. Grant it that we probably should have told her but... it was just easier this way. She had called BF last week and told him they she wasn't going to try because he threw a fit last year. But we have seen a lot of improvement in him so we were like 'it's worth a try" and BF called his teacher got the forms and paid. Well it went well yesterday and the teacher called BM (and BF) to tell her that it went well. She called BF flipping out because she hadn't filled out the form or paid (he said he took care of it) and then she laid into him about how THEY HAD TALKED about it and AGREED not to. BF was like no you just TOLD me you weren't, I was going to surprise you with them if the turned out. She just said oh.

to be fair BM didn't tell BF there was a parent-teacher meeting this month.

But that is not my concern, my question is if I/WE get engaged, married or pregnant, knowing I would never offer that info up, if BM asks do I have the right to tell her that it's none of her business and to stay out of it? If we have a wedding out of state I would tell her that we were taking the boys out of state but I assume I don't have to say why?