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Hard parenting issue

Sherrylyn's picture

I have 2 SS's, one 19, one 17. Just recently when talking to SS19, it came out that SS17 & his GF14 have been calling him a homosexual (in a crude manner) to his face & to others. This is all because he's shy & doesn't have a GF. SS19 handles it well, but why should he have to?

If it wasn't stigmatized, and homosexuals and people who are said to be homosexual weren't at risk of violent attacks and vandalism of personal property, maybe it wouldn't matter. I told SS17 that he can have as many differences with his brother, I'll stay out of it. I'm drawing the line at slander.

GF14 has no place in the differences between the 2 of them. Would SS17 like it if SS19 started calling GF14 a whore? I doubt it. As far as SS17's concerned that's not true, & he doesn't want it said. Where's the difference?

I explicitly told SS17 to tell GF14 to stop it right now. I also told SS17 that I will be talking to her parents to keep her in check. If she continues she's fair game for the same treatment.

I will take any advice because I'm at a loss.

Comments

Nise's picture

I agree 100% that if she doesn’t stop then you will have every right to talk to her parents about it and if it continues even after that out right BAN her from the house or family functions and tell her, if you want to disrespect MY FAMILY you will do it on YOUR OWN TIME at YOUR OWN HOUSE but it WILL NOT be tolerated here!) SS17 needs to realize that these little “tarts” will come and go but his brother is a life long relationship! If he isn’t mature enough to realize that, then you are well within your rights as a Stepmom to “show him the light” by whatever means necessary!

Sherrylyn's picture

SS17 said that GF14 is only defending him. From what you may ask? From SS19 telling SS17 to just shut his big mouth. I told him it only shows GF14's immaturity, because defending someone involves stating or showing facts to the contrary of a statement. The fact of the matter is SS17 has a big mouth, and he's a bit full of himself, & so there is nothing to defend.

lovin-life's picture

and my daughter is popular, athletic, etc. as are alot of her friends that she has over. I've warned my daughter that this house is my son's home too...anyone who comes into this house and disses him..or any member of the family can and will be thrown out of this home....by him even if neccessary!!! It's his house..not there's!

This warning came because of 1 rather snotty girl from school that I caught making rude comments under her breath regarding my son..

She hasn't been back!!!

They have no rights here...except by our good graces! As any guest, they must act accordingly in someones home......or they are simply not welcome!! Stick to your guns!!

What does this guy see in this girl!!!
I'm glad you addressed it with SS17. I don't know how much help her parents will be....they are the ones who see nothing wrong with a 14 yr old with a 17 yr old in the first place. (As a mother of a 13 yr old daughter......OVER MY DEAD BODY!!)

P.S.
Why does a 17 yr old young man need to be defended by a 14 yr old little girl anyway?

....and he's questining the 19 yr olds manhood!!