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VENT-Did this just really happen, or am I going totally f'ing insane?

reallifedrama's picture

Sitting here, chilling after a nice day out with my DH. He plops on the bed next to me, and the phone rings with the "an idiot is attempting to reach you" ringtone. It's almost 9:00 pm. What the f*ck could have happened???????

The " an idiot is attempting to reach you" ringtone is reserved for that someone "special", the BM.
(I can hear everything)
BM- "Hi. Can you ask {ME} if she can watch {our love child} this coming weekend. I need her to pick him up at 6:00 am, because I needed the money and and took a job at the mall as a manager."

DH-[10 second pause and me giving him a stare] "Uh, uhm, she's uh....(pause, and looks at me) I can get my mom to watch him"

BM-"Oh, why? Is {me} working this weekend. On a Saturday?"

DH-"My mom can do it."

BM-"Is {me} working this weekend" (I'm A TEACHER. SHE KNOWS THIS-I DON'T WORK SATURDAYS, and why the f*ck in hell is he lying???)

DH- (looks at me, turns white) "Uh, YEAH. Uh, she doesn't get up that early..uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh (take a breath already spineless coward)"

BM-"Well, I don't want to leave him at your moms. He might cry, and he is with her {me} a lot and will be fine with her." (I'm ready to scream, but I kept quiet)

DH-"Well, if I need to, I will take off this Saturday" (Me screaming inside-really??? you f*ck, balless b*tch that complains you're always broke-I DON'T THINK SO!!)

Bm goes on for 20 minutes, and DH keeps trying to accommodate her. I whisper, "She wants a favor, your mom can do it. END OF FU*KING STORY!)

She may have heard me, he repeats, "He'll be fine with my mom." Twenty minutes later and she agrees.

ME-"HOLD THE HELL UP. She's made arrangements to take a job and TELL you when you will take SS, and she doesn't like your arrangements, so YOU have to take off of work? You are accommodating her because she has decided to tell you what, how, when, where she expects you to do. When did I lose my wifey role???"

DH-"Babe, I was lying. I was going to just leave him with my mom and go to work"

Me-"Really b*tch boy? Why lie about it to her then? Why are you lying to her and worrying about what she wants. She's asking for a favor and had no right to make these arrangements. Remember when we got married and she said pick him up after the wedding because it's your weekend?"

Well, you don't have to get him Saturday until 3:00, after work. Why are you worrying about her predicament????? Take custody and she'll never be in another predicament like this again. No??????"

DH-"Babe, I just didn't want to argue with her."

Me-"Tell her, my mom will watch him, that's what I can do for you. Me and my WIFE are in bed, so call me back tomorrow if you want MY MOM TO WATCH HIM. PERIOD"

Husband's now out on the couch sulking. I know it's all my fault. I'm not understanding, a total mean b*tch, and the definition of unsupportive.

Did she seriously ask me to watch their kid???? She who told him not to talk to me??? Somebody kick me in the f*cking head, because I can't believe this, and I can't believe I am still here. WAKE ME THE HELL UP, PLEASE!

This f*ck has just seriously pissed me off beyond what I can even stand anymore. I have tried to be nice, supportive, understanding, but I can't. I've been pretty upset the last month, and it was like tonight I'm calm and we are sitting here so comfy, cozy, romantic, and together-BAM the phone rings! A SIGN????

WHY WHY WHY????? It's not supposed to be this way! I'm supposed to be the one sitting here smiling, and she's supposed to be the one dealing with the dumb f'ing decisions she makes!!!!!

Comments

reallifedrama's picture

My DH is a b*tch, an ahole, and a coward. He obviously has no loyalty, and he's a liar. That's why his son doesn't have his last name, BM has threatened and pushed him around for the last 5 years, and he couldn't even see his kid before w/o giving up his weeks pay check. WHATEVER...not my problem anymore.

He is now going to contend with me. If he thinks her nagging, b*tching, threatening and complaining are bad, he will be in shock at my quiet, tactful ways of dealing with all this. When I leave, it will be prepared.

I won't be threatening him for money, nor begging for his attention. I don't need either.

I put my hand out for the phone. I'm actually glad I didn't get it, because it was in the moment, and surely, I would have been sitting here regretting I didn't say more, or that I said things that made me look like an angry, jealous ahole.

He should have just said no, but God forbid he anger the beast eh?

It will be so funny to see how their lives turn out in the end without me here to help him "figure it all out". I've been figuring shit out since I was 17 ALL ALONE. No help from ANYONE-until now, STALKERS!!!

This seriously just isn't my problem. I have been letting it be, and the result is me being upset time and time again for NOTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I like my happy life, and there's NO REASON I shouldn't be enjoying it-except DH and BM. NO OTHER REASONS (well of course I'd like more money, but have what I need and lots of what I want)

notagain2012's picture

Does she not have friends, or are you her designated babysitter? If she is anything like the psycho I have to deal with, she prob doesn't even really have a job, she just needed to feel powerful and figured it was a nice evening to shoe it, and ruin your night, and cause issues.

I'm sorry:( glad he didn't try to even ask! That's a bonus right?

reallifedrama's picture

Oh, he went down a whole list of her family and friends and they are all working=on a SATURDAY, at 6:00 am!

I highly doubt she has a job. She is on welfare. For three years, she has collected CASH from my husband. I finally got my MIL to convince him she's on welfare and he's going to go to jail if he didn't start giving her checks. He tried before BUT THE BEAST SAID NO WAY!!!! She didn't have an account. B*tch boy cowed and said, oh ok.

She is probably going to meet up with some other moron this weekend, and get knocked up again "accidentally" because the pills "just stopped working". She needs more child support. Since my husband started making her take checks, she admitted that she was on welfare and told him to just give her $50 a week (big drop from the $300), because welfare would take the rest.

Yeah, so I don't believe the cow is working either. It's our weekend that DH doesn't have SS. I'm sure it took her until 9:00 to think this BS up. She's a moron, takes time to think this chit up with her hood rat, drunken flea brain (and infested) friends ya know???

reallifedrama's picture

I thought about something after reading this, I think she might possibly be working, and she will work for 6 months, collect unemployment and still be able to get income tax!

I don't know why this made me think of it, but it did, and she did work for six months last year, and I remembered my husband telling me they met at work, and she worked there SIX MONTHS!

Exactly what she needs for unemployment. What a friggin coincidence. Think I will pay more attention to her work pattern just to get a laugh, because it's not like I can do anything with it, but have yet another reason to find her even more repulsive than I already do.

Newstep's picture

This is so true!!! Sounds like our crazy when she is bored or doesn't have her own self inflicted drama going on.

Newstep's picture

I agree with a simple no end of conversation. She only does it because she can. They are all the same these BM's. As long as they have our guys balls they will use them to their full advantage!!

Once he takes his balls back her power supply is cut off }:)

reallifedrama's picture

That's crazy sueu2. I typed you about a 3 page PM and deleted it because really, what's there to say except that I need to get the f*ck outta this!!!!

Not Happening's picture

Just say no. There is no reason he should have even answered the phone, really.

The whole nonsense of him offering up his mother, goodness how offensive to HER.

Honey, you say you've just been "letting them figure it out"? How many times does he do this shit?

reallifedrama's picture

He answered the phone because he assumed that at 9:00 pm something must be wrong with his son.

I agree about him offering his mom being offensive, but hey, maybe that's where he learned to treat women the way he does.

Tonight, he's done it one too many times. My face is seriously beet red, and my head pounding, and I seriously feel like running the BM down and seeing her face print in my windshield, so I know this is beyond repair, understanding, love blah blah whatever. Just done ya know.

Not Happening's picture

Well, get those beets off of your face because the stains are not worth it. Sure, you can run BM down, but you know it's not her fault, right? I totally know how you feel.

Do you have bios with him? It's time to get your game face on. (((RLD)))

Drama3zone's picture

Oh my!! I FEEL for you! I'm beyond delighted to have found this site - I've been putting up with crap like this for YEARS and before steptalk thought it was ME! I seemed to be the only one blowing a gasket about the situation while BM, DH and SKIDS all seemed fine! Of course they were fine BM was off with her new man, sent the kids back to DH and me! DH was working 6 days a week and I was doing all the work of caring for their kids and then as they got older and poisoned by BM - taking all the emotional crap from them too!!!! - my DH is also a spineless bitch where BM is concerned - altho - a month ago he told SD to say sorry for her treatment of me or go (I had found texts between BM and SD bout me that were hateful). So she went and SD 13 to her BM - after me raising them for 8 years and her inciting them to hate me!

It's maddening isn't it? Then the DH's get pissed with us! Not the unboundaried and hateful BM!?!?!?!??!!

Urghhhhh I feel for you so much - this was like reading my diary - ur not wrong - I intend now to stay completely out of their shit - if SD or BM do call - I will be walking away - why give her an audience?!! I'll be walking off to have fun and cuddles with my son - or taking a lovely bath or ordering myself some new clothes online - just staying out - and will I do anything for my SD's again? Will I ever allow myself to stay around to listen to BM - NO

So im off to be happy - they can get on with it - and when DH comes to talk about situation to me I'll be saying 'not interested' - if you want relationship with me it's about us and our kids - or go away - you are boring me!

reallifedrama's picture

Nah, his are there...hers are just bigger. I know this because I can see them through her pants...I could be wrong...it might just be the two fat rolls separated at her belly button and hanging between her legs, but what do I know?

reallifedrama's picture

This is good advice and letting it go to voice mail, AND discussing it first could actually be a very positive way to prepare him, feel respected, and for us to be a team, rather than being the ones upset and aggravated by her.

She throws a FIT when he doesn't answer, but hey, we can save all of her psychotic voice mails as an added bonus~then, we can play them back later and laugh at her.

He knows anything BM says pisses me off...she could say "hey, it's raining", and I'd say, "Does she think we're f'ing idiots. Does she think she's some cuty patooty weather girl with a degree in f'ing meteorology?." Yep, a little cuckoo, but she always has an add on to justify my crazy thoughts...like, "I'm telling you it's raining because I want to make sure you know to put SS's hood on" LOLOL She's such a stanker.

reallifedrama's picture

I agree it was her problem, but not because it was on her parenting time, like if she had to go to the hospital, a wedding etc. I'd say take him. I got pissed because

number 1: she has the kid treating me like a criminal but expects ME to watch him? DH just told her recently the kid accused me of hitting him. She thinks that shits funny, and for all I know, she's trying to set me up (again, I know, I sound crazy). He didn't tell her they now go to MIL's for visits, but that's another story.

Number 2: She made the plans w/o even bothering to ask, she just DECIDED that's how it would be.

I'd like his answer tone to say, "I'm sorry due to a psychotic bitch, all incoming calls to this phone are being recorded by an automated answering system and they will be used to prosecute the psychotic bitch". LOL, I can daydream and laugh, or, I could answer the phone that way hahah.

I like the fart, though,very appropriate=== nothing but hot, useless, stinky air coming from the BM

xtina's picture

You poor thing! We all understand your frustration! In my situation, when my boyfriend has his 2 kids for a week at a time every other week, the one boy's mom calls all the time "make sure he brushes his teeth" 10 min. later... "It's going to be cold tonight make sure he wears warm jammies" and this bitch is a pill popper, no job lowlife. Why does she give a shit now because he is with his dad when she doesn't give a shit the rest of the time???
Its frustrating.
In your case, your hubby needs to step up and remember that he has his testicles and not her and STAND UP TO THAT BITCH. all the stammering and stuttering it sounded like he did makes me wonder what he says to her when you're not around...

reallifedrama's picture

"all the stammering and stuttering it sounded like he did makes me wonder what he says to her when you're not around..." Thanks! I feel so much better now lol. Seriously, I bet he doesn't say anything when I'm not around, but it's all good. I am going to help him figure this shit out. I've cooled down, and he's really a wonderful man. It's not a bad thing that he is trying to figure out how to keep the peace with his kid's mom.

We just have to make some changes and work on getting his responses to be more appropriate. I don't always know what to say in every situation myself. He is willing and that's what's important.

OMG! Do they give them BM's a handbook about how to constantly and continuously call the dads and harass them with their "professional, perfected parenting"? BM does the EXACT same shit. "Is he in bed? What did he eat? Where are you going? Who is there? It's raining" LMAO...

if she knew so much, why doesn't she have a man? why is she on her front step with water bugs galore seeking attention? why does she live in the hood? why is she calling us with nonsense instead of worrying about what she can do to teach SS manners, his alphabet, and how to tell the truth when he gets back home?

She could be at the library concerning herself with weight management, self-esteem, job searching or any other f'ing thing that would improve her life, but, instead, she calls to say, "This is Einstein. It's raining, so SS will need a hood on moron"