Appropriate consiquences for at home when kid gets suspended from school
Neither I nor my siblings ever got in trouble in school, so I have no frame of reference for normal "suspended" consequences. I am of the opinion that this is a very big deal and SS should be on serious lock down....while dh doesn't see it as a big deal and "all kids do this".
Other than no TV, SS isnt being punished for getting g a weeks suspension. He doesn't seem bothered at all....smiling and chatting with dh. So far as I am concerned SS is persona non grata. I think he should be doing chores or reading, no "extras" and just in general get the in trouble treatment. Dh says he's not going to hold it against SS forever..... Ummm, how about making him feel it week he's suspended as a minimum. He got into the fight on Monday morning and by Monday night you wouldnt have even been able to tell SS was in trouble, except for the lack of TV.
SS hasn't done his chores all week, his room is a pig stye, and he hasn't opened a book in almost two weeks. And its driving me crazy that its like business as usual.
Am I being overly harsh? Or is dh right and he shouldn't be reminded that he's in trouble/punished while he's on suspension? Dh was actually questioning why I didn't by SS a bag of chips or a candy when I stopped by the store yesterday????
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Hell no you aren't being
Hell no you aren't being overly harsh! You can bring up the holding it over him forever a few months down the road, but that kids should not be super happy right now. "All kids" do not do "this". Maybe if he didn't start the fight and was only defending himself????? That would be my only loophole.
Second fight of the school
Second fight of the school year (its only been 4 weeks) and he instigated both. Plus has been sent to the principal and a call home from a teacher.
I also didn t know anyone who
I also didn t know anyone who got suspended in school. I told that to him and his snarly response was that obviously my parents were better parents than he and I are. I hung up on him at that point
Yeah, I agree not to hold it
Yeah, I agree not to hold it over him forever....but I'd hardly call day three of a weeks suspension forever.
SS used to get suspended all
SS used to get suspended all the time. Those suspensions were treated more like vacation party time for him It was disgusting.
Nope. Your DH is just being
Nope. Your DH is just being overly stupid.
When OSS got a note about
When OSS got a note about fighting in class, Guilty Daddy was overjoyed. He viewed it as a sign that his oldest son wasn't a "sissy" or "fairy" (he actually used stronger terms). Could be that your DH (dumb head) is secretly PROUD that his kid resorts to fistycuffs. BLECH!
No, cause SS lost both
No, cause SS lost both fights. SS started both with name calling and swearing, and both times SS took it physical with shoving....and both times SS was dropped on his ass and SS ended up in tears.
Well I know in my case that
Well I know in my case that particularly YSS was REWARDED for bad behaviour. Totally surreal!
I don't know how old your SS
I don't know how old your SS is but if he is in high school its even worse. Your DH might not want to hold it over him forever but it will be held over him if he wants to get into a good college. Not only will the suspensions be on his record but the days missed from school can't be helping his grades any especially since he hasn't even cracked open a book. Your husband needs to stop being a pal and start being a parent if he cares at all for his son's future.
He's 11, almost 12 and in 6th
He's 11, almost 12 and in 6th grade....so middle school. And I'm pretty sure college won't be an option for SS anyways :/
Sorry to be the bearer of bad
Sorry to be the bearer of bad news but if there's a clause in the CO about providing CS for the skid in college or if it's state mandated (like it is here in NY) then you can bet your boots no matter HOW horrid the skid fails in grade/high school, he or she WILL be headed to college!!!
All three of my skids are always in trouble at school either for fighting or because their grades are far below abyssmal. The middle child (stb 15 in 9th grade with a 3rd grade reading and math level) scored in the bottom 8 percentile of the entire state. That won't stop them from being enrolled in college for remedial grade school non-acredited studies so that the CS gravy train can continue.
We are custodial
We are custodial unfortunately. Bm has zero legal custody, heard from her in nearly 2 years. So I'm not worried about being forced to pay for college..... I'm worrid about getting him out of my house in 6 years.
Tell DH that since he can't
Tell DH that since he can't find a suitable punishment, he can stay on the couch until SS is back to school....
My DD21 got suspended in 7th
My DD21 got suspended in 7th grade along w/ 3 other girls , because one of them was sexting (pictures) on a field trip bus, and the three others were aware of it. 3 day suspension (she went to a gifted magnet middle). Home punishment: No "AIM" it was very big back then, no e mail, grounded except for church, all for a month. She could no longer hang out w/ the sexter outside of school, ever. And I'm convinced that;s what kept her out of the primo IB program in our city, she was accepted to the #2 one. DS24 was accepted by the #1 one and he just went to regular middle school. (their grades were comprable). DS24 got in a fight in middle school once but wasn't stupid enough to get caught.