Surprise Court yesterday, fun fun
I haven't posted in a while, so this may be a bit long. I did go away from Fri-Mon night and it was wonderful, I had such a good time with old friends and being in my home town, I miss it very much and well, it's been very hard to adjust to being back here since my return, and I'm really not any more happy with BF than when I left.
Anywho, I came back and immediately started harassing him about the freakin lawyer. SD has been living with us for over 2 months now, full time, and CS is still coming out of his paycheck and going to BM. We've been waiting and waiting for a court date, and the damned lawyer, any time he is confronted about it, has some excuse as to why we don't even have a date. I told BF if he didn't get on it, I would, b/c this is ridiculous. I am scheduling job interviews, and SD's grandparents, who want to be there, need to request time off from work, as does BF, we can't do this at the last minute.
Well, that's exactly what happened, LOL. BF called the lawyer THURSDAY who informed us we had court yesterday at 9:00 am sharp. Lovely. No notice in the mail, no heads up, nothing. So the big question on everyone's mind was would BM actually show up. The lawyer said he had spoken to her and she did not plan to contest it, but I knew she'd show, even to be sure they wouldn't slap her with CS. So everyone moved heaven and earth to be there, and the grandparents and I were asked to wait in the law library for 2.5 hours in case we were needed, but otherwise it was just BM and BF in with the judge. It also took much longer b/c although we had filled out financial affidavits, the stupid lawyer insisted we didn't need them, and sure enough the judge wouldn't sign off on it until they were filled out, so BM and BF ended up in a room together for 45 minutes filling out forms (with BM running a great narrative apparently about how lazy mexicans don't clean the conference rooms well enough for her tastes, ugh get a freakin job you useless POS). BM lied on her forms, and according to the judge, we were entitled to less than 5.00 a week support for SD if we wanted to pursue it.
She is on the hook however for all the CS we've been paying her, and has 30 days to pay or be in violation. She claims she felt bad about it and hasn't spent it. Yeah right, I'm sure she got her tax money, and that's where it'll come from. She is, in the future, responsible for half of SD's medical and dental bills, though I'm sure we'll never see that money either. That'll come up soon enough, as SD needs her wisdom teeth extracted soon.
BM tried to fight with BF during the hearing saying "this all could have been handled better, you should have just talked to me" apparently she forgets the many times he tried, and she said SD would live with him "over her dead body" and the carrot of MAYBE move to my town and we'll think about SD living with you. There was no reasoning with her, and when BF reminded her of that, her response "well I was mad when I said that." BM you are ALWAYS mad, and second of all, that makes it okay to say whatever you want? You are not 3 yrs old! ugh.
BM wanted no part of the custody agreement I drew up, outlining weekend visits and holiday schedules, and so the agreement states she is entitled to "reasonable visitation" Which apparently she wants none of. In the whole 2.5 hours they were together, she did not ask once about SD, about how she was doing, etc. Not that that should be surprising, as SD emailed her a month ago, just asking how she was doing and asking for pictures of her two baby half sisters, no reply, and then emailed her mother again happy Easter last week, likewise, no reply. I feel so sorry for SD, she's taking it well, though we haven't told her her mother has no interest in seeing her. Basically it is on BM to initiate the contact by either emailing SD or calling BF to make arrangements. I have little doubt we won't hear from her for a long time.
Afterward, we took SD out to lunch to celebrate, and did a little shopping. So yup, it's over, at least until we need to fight with her about some medical bills or something, but for now, it worked out. So I guess I want everyone to know it's not always a hopeless situation, it cost SD's grandparents 2K, and we got it done.