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Am I right or wrong? opinions, please.

Nightshade's picture

This past Sunday, SD30 had a birthdaay party for her sons. One child's birthday is in Feb, the other in April. We have not spoken since Jan '11 when her father called her out(on the phone)for her behavior(see previous blogs)After 15 or so minutes of them saying the same thing(Him:you don't care about anything or anyone buy yourself, Her:you don't take my kids overnight)on and on, if you say the sky is blue, it is because we don't take her kids overnight! If you want examples of her horrendous behavior I can give them, but the issue here is not her. It is DH.

So, the party invite comes after no contact for months(between DH and SD)adressed to (Last name)(address)He knows I won't go so he says nothing. The week before, I mentioned in passing(I know, my mistake)that since he was on vacation, he might want to think about getting gifts for the boys because there would be no time once he got back to work. He is an adult so I was not going to forbid him like a child to go to this party. Just gonna wait it out.

Friday comes and he tells me he is going to buy clothes for the kids and says he spoke to his daughter about sizes. Ok, whatever. Sunday comes and he tells me he is leaving early(party starts at 2 and trip is an hour and 15 mins one way)so he leaves ay 10:30. Point of leaving early is we basically have one day a week, rarely not even that, but it does happen..so he doesn't "waste the whole day" in his words. He gets home after 5pm. He knows that on Sundays, I don't like to go out at night, my job is very demanding and Mondays are always a tough day...

So he doesn't say much about the party and I am not saying much because I am pissed. FF to last night. He mentioned a few things such as his ex FIL is quite sick, etc...I really like the guy but don't want to start hearing shit about this party, but I jokingly say, what color is Ex's hair now...she has a tendency to dye it and let it grow out and always has this grey/orangy root thing going on. Well he starts in on how the first thing he said to her is do blonds really have more fun? then goes on about her sister was there with her fiance and the ex tells DH no one likes fiancee..and on and on..you get the point.

My problem here is not the ex, I have no problem with her or thinking he wants to get back with her. That is ancient history. However, the issue I do have is that it was neither child's bday. He could have gone up on a weekday he has off that I work(kids are out of school at 3, they could hang out and have dinner and he could come home)There are also Saturdays I work...There was Feb school vacation he could have seen them or April vaca coming up...point is he does not see these kids often at all so why did it have to be then? He first says that it was easier for him because there were lots of people there so he didn't have to deal with his daughter..but ahe went early!!! so he could leave early..people didn't get there until 2(including ex)I feel like he wouold have rather spent the day there than with me and we don't have much time together(quality)anyway. Sorry this is so long...btw, I am a bio and step mom, have a huge bio, extended, step, half family so that is not an issue here, I always treated this woman like my own until she blatently disrespected me and my family...opinions please!!!Thank!!

Comments

Willow2010's picture

I think you are making to big a deal of it too. sorry. BUT...it sounds like your DH was flirting with BM?!

momagainfor4's picture

I don't think he thought he was flirting. I think thought he was making small talk or something.
I hate it when my ex used to do that sort of thing. And my bf does it to waitresses and stuff.
That comment.. so do blondes have more fun? har, har, har... well, to me that comment makes me think that it's conveying some sort of interest. Like he actually wanted to know.
I realize it's just something to say but why say anything?? Just keep your mouth shut.

It's so annoying. As far as him going to the party, well, I can understand it. He went. Going on a different weekend was not the plan. The plan was the party.
Regardless, this does not sound like your first rodeo.