Its been a wild ride lately. My wife decided to tell 14 y/o step daughter that the man she thought was her dad isn’t, it went ok on her part and she already contacted her real fathers family. I’ll call not bio dad “fake dad” for easier reference and because I don’t like him. He has threatened to tell her numerous times to try and hurt her when he doesn’t get his way so in that regard it was a good thing that can’t be used anymore. Fake dad freaking lost his mind, calling my wife every name in the book saying she lied to him for 14 years when by all family accounts and his own in the past, he knew day 1 and was actually why she never knew. According to them it was his decision because she was his now at like one year old and the other family wasn’t to be involved.

He drank them all homeless after 6 years and has been out of the picture since then except to show up a couple times a year and cause trouble. I’ve been with their mom since the kids were 7 and 8, and supported them the last 3 years since we’ve lived together. Step daughter started discussing the topic of adoption, her bio dad can’t come back to the US. I said of course I would but she is very hesitant to make fake dad angry. That frustrates me because fake dad doesn’t and hasn’t supported her or her sister at all since they were in kindergarten. I’ve been applying for the job for three years but it will work out for me either way I think. 

If she does ask me, he will go jump off a bridge or something because everything is solely and completely about him, not his other kid that is really his or anything, and hopefully disappear which would be great. Option two and she asks him, I’m handing over all support costs regarding both kids 100%, adoption is the rights and responsibilities of the parent and I wouldn’t dare rob him of any of the financial responsibilities that I have shouldered any longer, even for his child which he should have been supporting all along but he’s a deadbeat loser. 

I hate to be that way but when I got into the situation he was gone. States away gone, and had been for years, that was the only thing that made it fine in my mind to accept the responsibility. In my mind he was dead and they were orphans which wasn’t far from the truth on his end. Flash forward 5 years and he moves down the street, and wants to be involved, not financially of course, just enough to get pictures of them for Facebook to post with the most crass, self aggrandizing garbage anyone ever concocted about how it’s all about his precious girls *barf*. 

Hes a 1 minute walk away and both would stare at a blank tv for 6 hours rather than go over there, even his actual kid. The only way they will go is when he badgers their mom for days and she makes them then it’s for an hour maybe. 

Hopefully it all works out in their best interests but I won’t be disrespected by him any more if he does adopt her, they’re both on his bank roll at that moment and I’m getting a motorcycle.