:? Week at moms, week at dads. That's how the divorce agreement goes for my husband. The whole week that we are supposed to have time with the kids his ex makes plans that "must" happen during our week. I use to let that piss me off to no end! Its as if I'm (my hubby too) given an agenda to follow from the ex & therefore don't really have the week to make any plans for his kids. She fills up their week with us so she can stay in control.
Ha! Now, I'm a person who gives respect to all of the persons involved in these kids lives, but I don't get it back. My hubby does talk with the children (we have family meetings), but they glaze over & whatever we say is over ruled by "Queen X".
This is confusing the kids and they can't figure out who to listen to. So, they wait to be told what to do instead of being comfortable in their own skin. I have backed off greatly with negative behavior towards the steps, only to salvage my own sanity.
At moms, they have no chores. Over there if they vacuum a rug, they get paid (way too much $). Our home doesn't pay people for helping make our place a more comfortable place to be. So, chores are delegated accordingly.
My birth daughter hates the chores & begrudgingly voices her opinion often.