To my face and on text I am "mom" on SD's other posts I am the wicked step-mother...she talks about this woman"mom"..who made hers and my DH's life a living hell..put her with a baby sitter from infancy on, shut herself in a room to read while SD was left on her own..abuse was the norm for them..the AD (adopted mom) as her BM left them early she was commited to a mental hospital ..my DH can pick em..LOL.he thought she would take care of SD as she was all into school and child psycology,etc then.....but he tells me every day how thankful he is to have a HOME for the first time..AD used to lay a fork on the hot stove and when my DH came in the door would burn him with it.WELCOME HOME!!!!!.he would do all the cleaning and cooking while she stayed home and ate,watched TV and napped..then she left them..to go live with her brothers because she hated the one horse town they lived in..she expected him and SD to follow because she was large and in charge,and mean as hell,but instead they made a life for themselves and I came along a few years later..it gets pretty messy in between but again today she is all about her Mom that lives in the Midwest...I did more for her in 5 years than AD ever did..but we had rules... (she ran away to her because she knew she would be as ugly towards us as SD was..and we didn't even have a chance to talk with her on the phone..AD Mom asked for a huge amount of child support but when the judge denied it and gave full custody back!!! she never had custody..judge gave it only to us..she totally lost it on us.modifications ,lawyers.etc..broke us financially....then when SD became pregnant at 16 she threw her out as a bad influence AD had two children by that time..she has told me they don't talk but had made plans to take the kids up there last year :jawdrop: to see her but AD changed her mind and said no..., I don't want thanks only a little respect...and oh the things she says about me..not printable and so untrue..my DH says she is great at fiction writing and is always a hero in her own stories..Do I confront her..and lose her all together plus seeing the rare pics of my Grandchildren she posts on facebook??? Is she just trying to hurt me??? I guess that is a given.. or is it the deal when some one leaves they become more perfect??? she brings up things AD did to her as a child and blames it on me.every bad thing in her life was all me..step mother target for sure...!!!.and I didn't even know her..like AD used to cut her hair off when she was bad and I know she has been through a lot I sympathize and tried so hard to be good to her and fair....went overboard at times to make her happy but she is a cold fish..... but she said she only has room for one Mother and I am not it.!!!!.so sad Do I just keep taking the hurts..and lies??? any advice please...just so sad..and I know regardless now that she is 1200 miles away we will not see the kids until she gets in a fight with her 3rd husband and wants to get away and sleep so someone else can watch the kids..she has no friends and one so called friend ,,SD left with new husband to his work...is just as bad as she is talks behind her back and acts just as ugly and mean as SD is.they feed on each other..so she is never wrong.....she is 800 miles away from her now.and when people get to know her they don't call anymore..she doesn't wallow the kids to call us and we can't call them,,they are 1,7,4 in ages,,,.just feeling lost...thank you for any help...