I spend a lot of time reading the posts and replies on this web site and there are so many times that I want to respond. Most of the times, I am overcome by such a feeling of hopelessness that I don't have the energy to type.
I feel for each and everyone of you out there... I am so pleased to see more men actually participating on this site.. this is not a "female" problem but a "human" one..
All of us go into the stepparent maze with the same hopes... to do the best we possibly can and create an atmosphere in which all family members can grow and flourish.
Unfortunately, none of us live in a glass ball and we are all subject to the fall out from the actions ( or inactions) of others.
I have seen some resolution involving our blended family issues after nine very difficult years but it has all come at an extremely high cost ( my own descent into depression, which made me less available for my children... and the downward spiral of my sd into mental illness and drug addiction-she's only 16 and has a police record).
It's been so hard on everyone. All I can say is look after yourself and be true to yourself because if you lose the essence of what makes you tick, then you lose everything.
Good Luck All