She opened this door with SD by telling her that kids can choose where they want to live when they turn 14. SS will be 13 in a few weeks.

I just don't think she realized that it would bite her in the ass. These BM's think they are MOTY and they are not. She put him last so many times. This last email when she said SS was lying was because we asked to take him for his Karate test on her week. We wanted to make sure he got there since he told us that the last time he asked if he could call his Dad to take him when she was busy she said no and made him go to SD15 driving class instead. She told us in the email he enjoyed the class and was telling us for our benefit. The kid flipped when Dad read him the email. He was forced to go we think so that he didn't call his Dad.

So because of this email she made sure and had him at class last night with the whole gang. So we knew she was a perfect mom. Joke on her, the kid failed his test and has to come back tonight for re-do and tomorrow for graduation. Bet they don't all show. Now I really don't want to lose two more nights to this either, but I will be there with DH. Just sitting there gloating. I did bring his jacket last night (ironed of course) because his last comment to his Dad and was that we should because mom has no clue where his is. We make them buy everything separate. I got there and offered him the ironed one and he said no obviously stressed that we are all there, but he was so disheveled that I tried to fix it and he fidgeted so I walked away. Next thing she obviously then notices it and forces him to let her fix him. If I hadn't said anything, she wouldn't. Now the guess is whether she will brush his hair. He tells us she never makes him shower and he has no brush at her house. The list is endless.....

Hell yes there is a lot more to a story. Honestly you sound like a BM and not a STEP. You can say what you want about me. We have had to stop sheltering him from BM's lies. I have done nothing more than support my DH in this hell. I came on here to tell my story, so how exactly am I pushing this?

My SD15 has told lies upon lies. We live in an nice close community and I have had mothers tell me that my husband gave his daughter up and that I hit her. One recent one was on a soccer field no less, where I kept asking her to stop talking. These are people that do not know me. All are lies. She manipulated everyone and put this family through hell, because BM wanted to be her friend....

I used to think about running for office in the city, but because of all of this I won't even think of it...

As for making a scene. I didn't do that...I walked away when it was apparent that he was uncomfortable. The kid loves me and that is because I try and protect him. She is a horrible mom, she is so focused on one child she doesn't see what is happening with the other. She sued us and dragged this out for over a year and half now...We have spent over 12K and there is probably another 12K in our future for SS.

Yes I am letting them work it out. I do not get involved in this. DH has all communication with her, because I don't want to be involved....Get your facts straight before you accuse anyone of anything....read the blogs to see how we got here.

I am sure that telling him everything is a form of PAS and I feel guilty about it. But, how old does he have to be before he starts knowing what BM is saying about him? I am not kidding when I say it is something all the time with her. DH has finally stopped protecting SS.

As for your statements about the process. That is not what happens here. We have done this once in exactly the same manner, just a different kid. We can file it and we are in process now, we are waiting on when we have SS to have him sign the document with the notary. If she argues at all here in our state it has to go to modification and for us that is where the fun begins....It worked great last time when she wanted $1300 a month in CS only to be told she actually owed DH all these years and was entitled to nothing now. HA HA.....Yes KARMA......

I am sick of people defending BM's who so obviously are not good parents despite what they may believe.

Just so you know another reason SS asked to live here. Last week he found a cockroach on his pillow. He went to his mom and she said to go back to bed. He didn't he went to sleep in the living room where at 5:00 AM she came downstairs to train on her bike in the LR, woke him up, when he complained that he had just fallen asleep she told him to go back to his bed. He said no mentioning the cockroach. She told him to get over it. Our week started then and he came here a couple of hours later only to tell me this story. Between the cockroach and her reaction to him and accusing him of lying, the kid is tired of coming last. How can you defend this BM?

So how many Stepkids do you have???

Also as for the gloating. None of that was externalized last night at Karate. That is all in our heads. Exactly where it needs to be until BM is served with the CO modification....Just like she did to us....Karma....

I agree that SS could be playing us. But, there have been too many things that he has told us that proved accurate. SD15 played her and it is possible he could be playing us. But, I don't think so. He is a genuinely good kid and I think he just wants to be away from the drama of SD15 and BM. He wants some peace in his life. And this may sound terrible but, he has a nice setup here with a nice room, someone in the house all the time (I work from home), food that he likes and undivided attention from his Dad. He doesn't have any of that at BM's. She works 60 hours a week and SD15 always gives him a hard time. Found out last year from a teacher that she was beating SS up if he didn't move fast enough in the morning.

I think the kid just wants some peace in his life. He will get that with us.

As for Blendedfam, I think if it is not her, then it is defintely one of the BM's from Ivillage that come on here to stir things up...