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Do all BM's eventually lose it on the EX??? Update!

Jsmom's picture

Well the saga continues. After DH had taken SD14 to her mom's on Wednesday night, it went from Bad to Worse. SD ran into him at a restaurant and handled herself poorly. We are pretty sure BM doesn't know about this. We received a fax from the the Mom's attorney. Completely misstating the way DH handled the drop off. Lawyer stated the DH told her he was done being her father and to have a nice life. And threatened to take her dog to the pound. He told her he could not parent her this way. She kept breaking rules and then telling him that there was nothing he could do about. I am getting this from him, since I wasn't there when it happened. The dog never came up. That was discussed earlier in the week, but because the dog had been peeing in the house, and I was trying to make her help us by watching him better. I never said pound, I said maybe a new home. It is her dog. Quite frankly, I am the only one that really watches him.

She was on the phone the night before until 1:30 in the morning. When DH said that was not allowed, she told him fine, but she didn't care what he thought. That and another conversation about wanting to leave her migraine medicine on the kitchen counter. He said no, she was old enough to remember to take her pills and to leave them in her room. We have three kids, my BS keeps his in his room.

The lawyers are now arguing this out. She has rejected the document from him giving up custody, because she says SD is so traumitized and now needs therapy. So she wants CS. Unbelievable!!! She makes more money and she just wants to screw DH. That kid is so not traumatized. She started this. He says he messed up taking her. It may have made it worse now, but, what if he had lost it on her and that was worse. She was not letting him be a dad. Now he is talking about offering up an account for SD14 for College instead. I don't want that. I think then he just becomes that kind of Dad. Who just is there for the money. I will support whatever he does, as long as none of my money is paying for it. I did say that I don't think BM should control it. It should be an outside party.

As this goes on, SS11's filter on stuff seems to be coming off as well. He told me this morning that his mom says I am a bad mom. All because I wanted to drive him home this morning for the change off. A battle we have had before. I don't like the idea of them just walking home. Scares the hell out of me. So I took him and told him that next Monday if he needs a ride home to call me and I will come get him. I would feel better. His mom is apparently now saying anything in front of these kids.

I can not believe how this has escalated. I so want to go off on this woman. My husband has had two bad moments this week. He is doing what he can under the restrictions that BM has placed on him. His lawyers are not helping much. So frustrating. Now it looks like mediation.

Comments

herewegoagain's picture

Say nothing else...pay her cs only and never speak to her again. Make sure any visitation w/ss is set in stone and done at a neutral place...

Jsmom's picture

I don't say anything. In 5 years I have had three conversations that lasted maybe 2 minutes. Now in the last 3 months, I have had none, except the long letter I wrote her. Our lawyer has the letter. Ironically, her lawyer doesn't. It probably was too accurate for her and she didn't want her lawyer to know what she did to my son. (You can read the letter in a previous blog.)

I agree he should just pay the CS. It will only be for 4 years. When SS decides he wants to live here full time. DH thinks he will than he can sue her for CS to get back some of what we will have to give.

I personally don't think SS is going to want to live with us full time. He loves his mom. He will probably leave it the way it is. Husband thinks that the drama of my SD14 there and her SS15, will be more than SS11 can take.