Condo Debate &The Kids
Thank you to all who gave advice on my previous blog.
I had a discussion with my husband last night about our housing situation.
My husband has come up with two proposals:
One is that his daughter can buy the condo. We will both be able to live in it. He (and I) can live there till he passes with no conditions other than paying the property taxes, utilities and general maintenance costs. Should I remain single, I could live in the house until I pass. If I remarry or enter into a long term partnership, it would be expected that I move out. The condo will revert to his daughter should we both pass, or I remarry. This way we can both keep our saving for living costs. He would not expect me to pay for any house taxes or maintenance costs as I don't do so now. He also has a small life insurance for me should he predecease me. I would be responsible for all property taxes, utilities, maintenance costs afterwards.
Two is that we buy a small condo together. This would require a contribution from both of us. He would still pay the property taxes and utilities. This will significantly impact my retirement savings. He is able to buy the condo on his own, but as a joint venture, he is looking at me to provide 20% of the cost. This ratio has to do with our savings for retirement. He would leave me the condo in event of his death, but most likely reduce the life insurance because of the upfront cost of buying a house.
I can't help feeling that it is all about money to these people (my husband and his daughter). Although he can afford to buy the condo on his own, he is looking at me to provide some capital. Is he correct to do this?
Another issue we spoke about is the size of the new house. He is looking at two bedrooms. One for us and one for me to use as a sewing room. He doesn't want a guest bedroom at all. He says we don't need it. I disagree. I enjoy having my grandchildren stay over. Or being able to provide a room for a guest. My husband doesn't want the kids or grandkids staying over. Yes, we do live in the same town but it is part of my family's tradition to stay over or have the grandkids over. I really do love spending time with the grandchildren and I feel hurt they won't be able to stay over with us. At present they are staying over on a regular basis and we have some summer vacation time with my grandchildren.
Also, at the moment my son is staying with us. He is in process of getting divorced and my husband and I took him in until he is on his feet again with his own home. He is with us for three months only and during this time he has to find a place of his own and set it up. If anything happens in future we won't be able to help the children with a roof over their heads. My husband is not bothered the children may need a place to stay. All he says is that they should have their own homes. It may be the attitude he wants to take with his children but it's not one I want to adopt with mine.
Any advice and comments you have will be appreciated. Thank you kindly.