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xmas gifts and step kids ho ho ho

inky2034's picture

I have a SD that's 24 and SS that's 30. My husband the bio dad to the SD and he adopted the SS at 4....The SS has nothing to do with him and doesn't speak. I am guessing a sign of support to the bio mom. The SD does come to our town 1 -2 times a year. basically around the holiday's as she finds time to pick up her Ipod ( gfit this year) and over 1000 dollars worth of clothes. She is overly attached to her Bio mom as I think she feels sorry for her mom and it appears the SS and SD have sided with their Bio mom. I get it. I really do but if I send emails. leave a message or text I get nothing back from the SD. I don't even try to communicate to the SS. I know on some rational level they are siding with their mom as protection and of course she buys them anything they want. Even supporting the son as he is unemployed....I say nothing negative about either of the two kids. I stay out of it. yet it really hurts my feelings that the SD doesn't want to connect with me. Sometimes she is rude to me but lately not. She is coming for the holiday for 4 days...I always try and say "let's go get our nails done" to spent some time together.. make her favorite foods etc....Told her I wanted to get to know her better and spend more time with her....Need advice on why is it that uncomfortable for her to have any relationship with me? PS Been married almost 5 years and it's getting worst...not better.....thought they would get use to the idea and warm up to me....now the SS has nothing do to with his dad and he's married as well.... I have no kids and never was married till 46 for the first time...was I really that stupid to think it would calm down? It's five years later......HELP
My husband thinks she's better and keeps giving her money because she has him around his finger........