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Why people and families and kids are disfunctional?

IAMGOOD's picture

It has been 11 days since the incident with my step-son. This is what has occurred since then. No counceling appointment has been booked for him. His dad had one conversation with him supposedly laying down the law and he came back to our house last night not acting too worried about getting the boot for bad behavior.

Families are disfunctional because of adults running the household not having any balls to act like parents. Mother's that keep saying "oh, poor baby" "you poor victim" and Dad's that tower over the kids but allow the kid to have the upper hand.

I am starting to feel like this is a perfect set up for ME to get abused. Right now I am. I am the one that is targeted. I am the one personally attacked. I am the one who is having my personal affects vandalized. Guess what? I am the one who clearly is going to have to explode the bomb here. I am going to have to stir the pot and lay this kid out and get him out of the house. If my husband can't handle him then he needs to go. Now the little A-hole doesn't want to go. BUT, still refusing to comply with the bare mininum house rules we have. Still doing passive aggressive stuff too. He has NO intention of complying because why should he? What will happen to him if he doesn't comply? Maybe an hour of xbox taken away? As soon as my husband shows any anger the young man calls mom and say "oh - dad is yelling at me". Ridiculous!!!! He has earned his right to be angry and respond appropiately. Out in the real world you do lousy things to other people they are going to get angry. This is why we have all this passive aggressive nonsense. Mom won't let people be angry - including him. Can't handle confrontation at all. Dad is the same way. Can't handle confrontation. Fighting verbally is important!!!! Putting stuff out there is needed at time. We have to express emotions and get them out. Well - I am giving it today and tomorrow as I told my husband and then I pull the "sh#t stick out" and show it to him and get a nice show going. Best case scenerio he will never come back!!!!!


IAMGOOD's picture

Thank you for being angry for me. I am trying so hard to see straight beyond the anger. Why doesn't he run out and get cameras and just DO IT!!!! We are meeting with counselor again this morning but I have lost patience and waiting for the signs for me to pull the switch and get him out. All I have to do is ask him to put a dish away and that's all it will take. He has decided that I am to say nothing or have any power in the house and HE wants to be in charge.

thank you!!!

Harleygurl's picture

If your stuff is getting vandalized then you have every right, in your home, to protect your things and yourself. It's called respect. Don't wait for dad to take away 1 hour of x-box. Take the damn cord off the back and hide it or if the X-box is originally from BM's house then politely deliver it back there.

Your house therefore you deserve respect. My oldest BS20 struggled with this concept when he was around 15 - you respect me then I respect you. He went without a bedroom door for quite awhile. My house, my rules. Smile