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Related Topic: BM has started her nonsense again

IAmALady77's picture

SO gets SD every 4 days. As in BM has her for 4 days then SO gets her for 2 days, BM 4, SO 2 and so on.

Sometimes on one of SO's nights he'll have to work, mind you he works nights so he'll go in around 8 and get out around midnight...WHEN SD IS SLEEPING. I am here so no big deal.

Also remember when I took it upon myself to record our "meeting" with BM when she agreed to this new parenting time? Well SO CLEARLY told her during this meeting that sometimes he would have to work at night and was she okay with that? Oh yeah, not a problem at all! (her response).

Fast forward to today when suddenly what he did was illegal because she never would have signed this parenting plan it was under false pretenses blahblahblah.

She made an appt. with their case worker and wants SO to sign something saying he won't work on the nights and/or days that he has SD. He said sure as long as she does too! }:)

Her response? "well IM a full time MOM I HAVE TO WORK." You are not a full time mom dumbass, you are a 60% time mom and SO has to work too...effing moron. The only difference is HE works nights and isn't sticking her in daycare all day.

She then proceeds to call our house nonstop for the past hour. My therapist told both of us NO MORE COMMUNICATION with the crazy unless it is an emergency. I figured she would leave a message if it was important. She didn't. Whatever.

THEN we get a call from FMIL saying BM just asked her to watch SD TONIGHT while BM is "at work". Mind you BM was "at work" all day, we JUST dropped SD off to her at 3! sooooo wtf? BM wants FMIL to watch SD tomorrow and friday too. I'm sorry, isn't that what SO is paying the daycare for? FMIL told her no because she in fact works during the day. BM is an idiot.

BM then calls SO and tells him that he doesn't need to go to the meeting with the caseworker because she has some things she needs to discuss with him in private, some things that she heard from her "lawyer"....

I realize she is just trying to make him paranoid but what your thoughts on this?

Does he call the caseworker and set up his own appt adn let him know what is going on? Can she do anything (as in get anything put into motion or in the CO) without SO even being there? Should he just show up?

Help please. This bitch is upping my stress levels and I already had therapy today, not due back for another 2 weeks!!!!

Comments

RainbowsAndDaisies's picture

Tell her no way. You just signed a parenting plan, recently from the sound of it. Tell her N-O. Also, have YOUR lawyer tell her that she cannot dictate what happens during your so's time with kiddo. Keep documenting everything, especially that bit about bm trying to drop kiddo with FMIL. Keep all reciepts pertaining to kiddo (clothes, toys, happy meals, restaurant bills, movie stubs, museum tickets, grocery reciepts, whatever). Get your phone records so that you can show that bm calls you upwards of 5, 10, 15 times a night during your time with kiddo (thats called harrassment and interfering with parenting time). Keep a journal of every encounter/contact with bm. Keep all reciepts pertaining to kiddo. DOCUMENT EVERYTHING and dont let her jerk you around.

IAmALady77's picture

Don't worry, I've got documenting down to an art form lol, I was just concerned about this sudden private meeting she has with the case worker...they can't put anything into effect without SO present right?

IAmALady77's picture

So he should just show up at the meeting even though she uninvited him? He has the note that she JUST handed him today at drop off with the time and date of the meeting.

Jsmom's picture

Who the hell is she to do anything about that meeting??? You are giving her all the power. Big mistake.

IAmALady77's picture

She doesn't KNOW that I ask you guys for advice and that we don't know everything all the time. You guys are right, SO will show up as planned and we'll go from there. She doesn't have any power because she doesn't know if we are falling for her bluff or not, but I get your point.

Purplemom's picture

I wonder if she is pulling a fast one. Telling him "this one is private etc. etc."

Telling the worker "Well I told him but I guess he isn't going to show up" If it were me, I would go.

PeanutandSons's picture

Of coarse he should show up at the meeting. Who is she to tell him not to go? If he wasn't supposed to be there then the caseworker would have called him. If he doesn't go she will just say...see, he doesn't have is daughters best interest at heart, he can't even bother to show up. Then what's he going to say....bm told.me I didn't have to?

B22S22's picture

I'd be assy enough to call the caseworker to "confirm the meeting" because DH was initially informed of the meeting then was informed not to come by the BM.

If he doesn't show and should have, I'm sure the BM isn't going to tell the caseworker that she told your DH NOT to come. It'll appear as though he doesn't care enough to come.

Purplemom's picture

I do't know why they do these tings... but I am working on a way to identify and repel them! I'm currently in the R&D stages of "crazy bitch spray"
You spray it at them to repel them, and when it comesinto contact with a crazy bitch it will adhere to all clothes/skin and turn the crazy bitches least flattering color as a warning to all other innocents in the crazy bitches path!

I'm currently looking for investors... anyone?

IAmALady77's picture

She just called again, SO answered and she started bitching again so he hung up. She called again. I answered and yelled "DO NOT CALL THIS hOUSE AGAIN UNLESS IT IS AN EMERGENCY OR WE ARE CALLING THE POLICE GOODBYE. I then hung up. I think she got the message, she has yet to call in the past 10 minutes.

purpledaisies's picture

That is not true it depends on the state you live in. In ar you can record even if the other party doesnt know. Our lawyer told us this. Yes your dh needs to go or call. She is setting him up

Stepcop's picture

In Texas, only one party has to be aware that they are being recorded for it to be admissible. Attorneys don't like this kaw, but it's there. Depends on your state. Our bm is a psycho, just like sd. She is a texting fool, and of course knows exactly the buttons to push to get directly to dh's destruct sequence, it's ridiculous. I take the phone away.

IAmALady77's picture

Yes, I looked up the law, only one person in my state has to know they are being recorded in a private conversation and both SO and I knew so....lol

HadEnoughx5's picture

BM's an asshole. Idk, with the week I've had, I wish they could all get fucking shipped to a freezing island. }:)

IAmALady77's picture

Funny you should say that, I'm watching all the seasons of Lost on Netflix lol and I was just thinking what a perfect place that would be for BM }:)