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It's only the second day of school and I am DONE!!!! (Vent)

gtrmom's picture

I am tired of it, I don't know why I do this to myself. SD started the 5th grade and on her second of school she already had homework; she did at her after school program but I wanted to check it before she went to bed.

When DH got home I said out loud... "SD, you got homework... right?! can you please bring it out so daddy and I can check it!" This was my first mistake!!! I shouldn't have cared. She gave me major attitude for bringing it up and then didn't want to hear it when I tried to tell her that something was wrong. Thankfully DH stepped in, as he tried to help her he too got attitude from her (jajaja, I am no longer the only one that she is rude to). He got a bit upset to he made her take out the HUGE dictionary that we have and look for EVERY single word in her spelling list. Before he did that i tried one more time to help her out and make things easier for her to understand, but she doesn't like to listen when I speak. I guess I don't know anything, which pisses me off because I am only trying to help.

It is my own fault, I WANT to help but I need to learn to just allow her to do her homework and then let DH check it and have her fix it. She has done this before during her summer sessions, but NOOO I am the idiot that wants to help. So I think I am D.U.N. done!!! I feel bad and would love to help but NO MORE!!

BTW, changing the subject but still venting...
BM may have fallen off the wagon and back on to meth. We are terrified that she wants to see SD. DH and I don't know what BM may say or do and we want SD to be safe. She misses her mom so much and we understand that she needs to see her, but we just don't know what to do. The therapist says we HAVE to take her to see BM, but the lawyer says no.

Even though SD annoys the shit out of me, she is MY SD and I want her safe. I don't to see anything happen to her, but I would like to see her happy. I think that seeing her "mother" will make her happy. DH, nor I, can stand BM and we have no proof that she has in fact "fallen off the wagon" but she called DH the other ranting about something that made absolutely NO SENSE!!

I am sorry I am all over the place, but there is just so much in my head that I cannot think straight, which doesn't help with my depression. DH & I are still having issues because I am still upset that he thinks I am his, and the kids, personal assistant, aside from working a full time job. He and I had a talk the other day, but I didn't find it in me to bring up that when we first met he said he "wouldn't had given me a second look if I had a kid with an ex". uuugggghhh... whatever!!!

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beyond pissed-off's picture

Totally get your homework frustration. My skids (teenagers) react the exact same way - when they actually DO their homework that is. What does that say about their maturity level that they react the same way as a fifth grader??? I have decided that this year I will simply not be around when homework is being done. Their father can deal with it or not. I am betting on not. I can't tell you the number of times SS16 told him that his homework was done and we found out later (we can check assignments/test scores online) that he never did it. And did his father bust his ass for lying? Only one time and the punishment was to stay in his room and do nothing but school work all weekend. Please! The boy was in and out every hour and at one point I found FH actually HELPING him put together a BB gun in the living room. I made the mistake of pointing out how counterproductive that was and FH was so pissed off - AT ME!!!! No wonder his kids have no respect for him........

I remember reading your post about his "if you had a kid with an ex" comment and can totally understand how it keeps rattling around in your brain. Do you find that, no matter what the topic of your irritation is, you always end up adding that comment into it as well? My FH has said and done some things that I just can't let go even though I want to very badly. Do you think it is really possible to let things like this go? I am having my doubts. I really would like to hear your thoughts on this if you would like to share.