You are here

Tattoos & piercings

frances's picture

Well my SD turned 18 and went out and got her nose pierced. My BS has a tattoo that he got when he turned 18 and my SS and SD want to get one as well. My H hates tattoos and piercings. He doesn't know about the nose earring yet but will find out when he gets home from work today. I warned him last night she might come home with one and he said he guesses that's better than the tattoo because she can at least remove it. I asked her if she got a tattoo as well and she said no, so we will see. My ex has a tattoo and so my son thought it was ok for him to get one as well. I guess kids now just like to express themselves and turning 18 is milestone so they go out and do something their parents can't control.

Comments

Lace Lady's picture

Just about everyone my age in my extended family has a tattoo, including me. The old folks seem to be bothered with it, but for us it's no big deal. However, it is an investment, so if she gets a tattoo, tell her to choose wisely. Check out the artist's credentials, make sure it won't be something she regrets or in a place that she'll one day regret.

goingcrazy's picture

Don't assume they are doing it to show control. I am 33 years old, have two kids, a business professional owning my own real estate brokerage, finishing my degree for elementary education, a girls scout troop leader, a volunteer in the children's ministry at our church. I have five tattooes and several more in the planning stage. I have four piercings and my nose is the next one to come.

It is about self expression. I remember sitting at my dad's house after I got my first tattoo. I was 22 and holding a two month old baby that I had recently given birth to. He asked me what I was going to say her when she got older and wanted a tattoo like mommy. He wanted to know what sort of example I was setting. I told him that I would tell her on her 18 th birthday I would pay for her first one so long as it had a deep meaning to her, and ink on my skin did not affect my moral stance. Now eight years later, I have a daughter with very strong Christian values, a straight A student, top in her class and inthe gifted program at school. I have a child who never argues and does what she is supposed to do, who is very respectful and honest with me. She does not want any tattoos right now and thinks my wanting to pierce my nose is "dorky". I think I am setting excellent examples for her.

My husband has twelve tattoos and the hole in his tongue where the piercing used to be. He is an incredible father and a hard working husband. He is devoted to our church and focuses his life around God. He is an honest man who does not drink or use drugs.

I think that body art at one time had the stigma of trouble maker and drug use. It isn't. And I am not trying to stand here on my pedistal and preach or judge. I just wanted you to understand that the kids did not wake up one day and say "hey let's piss mom and dad off today!!". They are finding themselves. Be glad they are individuals with their own self expression. I would concern myself more with how they are doing in school or work. Let your hubby know it is so socially acceptable now and is really the "norm". Try not to think that the kids did something wrong. Because it really isn't.

"I didn't lose my mind, I sold it on ebay."

Elizabeth's picture

I do not like tattoos and would never have one. Same with piercings other than the two where I put my earrings. However, I don't have a problem with them. If my BD4 wanted to dye her hair purple tomorrow, I would let her. That is cosmetic. It says nothing about the person she is inside.

That said, when BD is 18 she can make permanent alterations to her body. Not before. She can get her ears pierced (one hole for each ear in the traditional place) while she is a minor, when I decide it is time and she wants it. But any other piercings or tattoos will wait until she is legally able to make that decision.

MamaJenn24's picture

with anything that has to do with self-expression and I completely agree with Elizabeth about when the kids are 18.

I don't have anything other than the pierced ears that I've had since middle school age.

I have a thing about needles still...I know, I know, 4 kids and I'm still nilly willy about needles...

I've heard getting your nose pierced hurts like HELL!

MJ24

Sasha's picture

I don't mind them, as long as they are in good taste and you don't overdo it. My brother designed his own tattoo as a memorial to my brother who passed away last year. It's a Celtic cross with his name inscribed. If my DH didn't hate tattoos so much, I would have the same one done, only smaller.

I have two piercings in each ear. I think a piercing on the side of the nostril with a small flat diamond stud can be very attractive on some people. Now the bullrings in between the nostrils I find plain gross. You may as well attach a dixie cup to it and call it a snot catcher. I don't go in for gauging the ears either...I think it's ugly. Somehow having earlobes hanging on my shoulders when I am 70 just isn't very appealing.

Some people just go too far though. Try taking your multiple tattooed, multi-pierced body on a job interview for a professional position and see how far self expression gets you.

Angel's picture

to hurt anyone's feelings but I think (& I'm from an older generation) the way I was taught; it is about class. I know it is the in thing about self-expression nowadays but I think (most)people will learn to regret these permanent modes of self-expression. I remember painting flowers on my legs (in the late sixties), but they could be washed off!

kathleen's picture

Both my husband and I have tattoo's. But the funny thing is, the other day I said, you know, I don't really like tattoo's any more. He said he felt the same way. I'm glad mine is in a place where I don't have to show it if I don't want to. I still like the look of my tattoo but I'm not sure if I always will. When I see little leprachan's on ankles and cutsey little designs, I figure that 18 year old impulse will be bothering the 30 year old one day. We change a lot over the years.

So with my daughter I would talk to her about the significance to her and the meaning of the tattoo. Then I would suggest she pick a design and hold onto it for 5 years. If after 5 years, she still wants that design on her body, well go ahead. But those 5 years start at her 18th birthday, because hopefully at that point she will have a strong sense of self and will be doing it for the right reasons.

Lace Lady's picture

I know a lot of older folks who have tattoos, my parents included. (They have more than I do) MY SF got a couple of his covered, & my mother is planning on getting her oldest one covered. While it's true that you may out grow them, it's not hopeless. And it gives you the chance to get a new design without having to figure out a new location for them. I figure, you only live once. You might as well enjoy it.

Right now I have a tat covering a scar on my leg. It's a little higher than my ankle, so I can either wear slacks or a long boho skirt that doesn't quite reach the ankle & it's fine. LOCATION-LOCATION-LOCATION. My next tat will be on my shoulder of an exotic parrot like the one I grew up with. I miss my old bird so I'll put him back on my shoulder where he belongs. The ankle to knee tattoo... it's ambitious but might not ever happen, so we'll see in a few years.

Cajun Lady
"Laissez Les Bon Temps Roulez"

Karma_'s picture

I am 37 and got my first when I was thirty after about 5 years of researching the perfect thing.

All my tattoos are in places no one will ever see unless I choose to show them. In my role (until recently) as a Bank Manager I needed to look professional and I did.

My kids are 17 and 18 and both want tattoos, but I am urging them to think carefully, as what you choose at 18 is often not what you like at 28. The other thing is I refuse to pay for tattoos or piercings. If they can't afford to get what they want, they will have to wait until they can. Simple.

Everyone is different (I would never consider any form of facial piercings, nose or otherwise), but for me my tattoos signify my spiritualism and spiritual growth. One also signifies my daughter who passed away. Its a beautiful way to remember a beautiful soul.

Lace Lady's picture

It's illegal for anyone under 18 to get a tattoo in these parts, but that's a good thing. My mother paid for my first one, and she paid for other people's first tattoos as a graduation gift. She offered to pay for one girl's first tattoo, but she dropped out of high school, so she's not getting one unless she gets her GED. It hasn't happened yet.

The tattoo on my leg is of a baby tiger. I love animals, especially cats, & a year before I got my tat I got to pet & feed a baby tiger. As for the one I've got planned, I had a parrot for the first 29 years of my life & I miss my bird. So it is sentimetal.

I think tattoos should have a personal meaning to a person, whether it's a tribute to someone you love or a belief you have.

Cajun Lady
"Laissez Les Bon Temps Roulez"

sweetthing's picture

I have two tasteful tattoos. I got my first with my church going conservative mother & my second w/ DH. I am a nice girl & some people are surprised. I have 1 on my shoulder that people rarely seen, the chinese symbol for tranquility which I would love to achieve some day. On my ankle I have a heart with a vine through it. It is larger & hurt like heck.

Funny story, last year I fell on a rusty pitch fork when I was pregnant ( this is NOT the funny part...very scary infact) and it punctured my calf, I had to have two shorts of novicaine so they could clean out the wounds. The novican shots hurt so bad I almost passed out. The ER doc says, " Miss, you have a very large tattoo on your ankle, you can't tell me that didn't hurt more than this" I said oh it hurt, but I am telling you NOTHINg close to this. I have since figured out it is because novicaine stings going in.

I feel as long as it is tasteful & doesn't prevent thm from getting a job someday, each to their own.

Harleygal's picture

in my nose. Left side - barely visible. Not a big deal. I barely remember it's in there unless someone brings it up. But my boss does not like it. Tough! Until I see it in our policies, it stays in. There is a guy here that has multiple ear piercings. Very noticable. Until they make the rules apply to everyone, it stays in. I guess I am a bit of a rebeller too! DH has an ear piercing that he has had since the 80's. He doesn't wear it to work now. He did once in the past - to rebel. Dh has a tattoo as well.

I let my daughter pierce hers at 16. I forgot to check the school policies. Oops! She was a straight A student and got detention for it because I wouldn't make her take it out. I just noticed when I did read the policies though that they were breaking policies in other areas allowing students to do this and that which was against rules. They had no choice but to let her return to class. She no longer wears her nose ring today. I guess it was a phase for her.

Einstein's definition of insanity is "doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results."

Sasha's picture

about people who are getting cosmetic surgery to close the holes in the ears created by gauging. People are starting to realize that having a hole the size of a silver dollar in their ears inhibits their professional advancement.

Karma_'s picture

Awesome story!

Sita Tara's picture

After the affair with the married friend ended I got a huge tattoo on my lower back - a yin/yang with henna styled swirls around it. I still love it. It was so significant and was the beginning of a new era for me. The pain of getting the tattoo was a right of passage, a letting go of the past and looking toward a new life.

I would like another, but not till I lose weight one day.

When Anna wants one, I'm with Kathleen and some of the others that when she's 18 I will take her if she wants and help her pick out something that she won't likely regret later. But I would encourage anyone to wait until their older so they know what they would want to keep. I know lots of people with cartoon characters they got in their late teens, early twenties that they had removed later.

I will also stick to my back where I can cover it up. They're more private, for me, then about showing. Although if I can get in a tankini again this summer mine will show Smile

"Om Tare Tutare Ture Mama Ayurpunye Jnana Putin Kuru Svaha"
~Sita Tara Mantra

Karma_'s picture

I have the swirls on my lower back around a monarch butterfly that symbolises my daughter who died. Its gorgeous (an old lady recently told me she loved it!). I have a pink lotus blossom on the base of the back of my neck with the words Om Mani Padme Hum underneath it in Tibetan script, and my latest tattoo is an Om symbol on the inside of my left wrist. I love my tattoos, they are so meaningful for me. I am thinking about getting a large back piece of Lakshmi who is the Hindu goddess of wealth, luck, love and beauty, the lotus flower and fertility.

Sita Tara's picture

That's a beautiful tribute, and definitely more painful than the experience that drove me to get mine. I did feel that the pain from the tattoo was healing. A physical release for so much heartache.

"Om Tare Tutare Ture Mama Ayurpunye Jnana Putin Kuru Svaha"
~Sita Tara Mantra

Karma_'s picture

You can see a picture of my daughter in my Facebook albums. She died at 15 months.

Actually there are picures of my tattoos on there too.

Harleygal's picture

your daughter also. Can you send me your info by PM?

Thanks,

Einstein's definition of insanity is "doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results."

Bec's picture

I got a stick on tat out the cornflakes once, it was one that goes round the belly button. It looked like a cats arse!!!!
SD16 is into ear stretching, not too big as yet but I believe people get addicted to doing it so I expect by the time she is 18 she will have horrible dangly earthworms as earlobes.

Sita Tara's picture

When they are old ladies having those holy lobes????

Gross!

"Om Tare Tutare Ture Mama Ayurpunye Jnana Putin Kuru Svaha"
~Sita Tara Mantra

Karma_'s picture

three drops of blood dripping from your... oh never mind Wink

My hubby has two half sleeves. They look awesome.

BabygotBack1988's picture

my ears peirced at the bottom once and owhen i was 13 i decided i wanted the bit at the top doing on one side this was really unconfertable to sleep with so after about a year i took it out

i also have my belly button peirced but due to my wieght gain i think i may take that out both my mum got for me i was 14 when i got my belly dont it does look nice until you get fat hahaha

life is a box of choclates you never know what your going to get (i always pick the coffe of the box what about you ) Blum 3

Sita Tara's picture

I had the top one (like you described) done after I had BS 13, as my own little attempt to hold onto my pre-mom individuality. Yep it was painful and my ear swelled up to the point that I had no definition in my cartilage (attractive!) I had to go on antibiotics because that's the only one that ever got infected too.

I started coveting a belly button ring, nose ring and tattoo around that time as well. It had a lot to do with being in a local production of JC Superstar, where the whole cast took on the bohemian tendencies of the original 70's musical. I did go for the belly button ring then tattoo after my divorce/breakup with my married friend. But the nose ring, alas, I let go of. I just don't have the kind of nose that looks good with it. Tiny little perky little nose that most people think is wonderful. I think it's boring. I just think noserings look better on ethnic looking noses. Or maybe really YOUNG noses. Not 40 year old waspy noses. Feels like I would look like a wannabe if I did it!

"Om Tare Tutare Ture Mama Ayurpunye Jnana Putin Kuru Svaha"
~Sita Tara Mantra

frances's picture

Thanks guys for all your comments. I told her to make sure on the tattoo that it is something she will have to live with permanently. She wanted some angel wings in the middle of her back but I told her she should think on that one. My H saw the nose ring last night. I had prepared him ahead of time for it and told him to remain calm. He saw her and just looked at it and walked away. He will be ok.

Chel Bell's picture

I just got my eyebrow pierced a month ago....it's a very "dainty" piercing, but is visible enough. I like it, because it shows my creative side...(along w/ my short white-blond hair) and gypsy style clothing. I love silver jewlery, and my ears are double pierced, again "dainty"earrings. I'm guess what you call "eccentric", and young at heart. I have thought of a tattoo, also to cover a small scar,(it will be prettier than the scar, so why not?) and want to do that soon....but that will be enough for me. I don't want to be to freaky.~"I'll get you my pretty...and your little dog too!"~

Tara12's picture

I have 5 - of course where no one can see. Even as a teenager I was still concerned about how I would look! But they all mean something to me. The first was when I was 14, the rest were after I was 18. I am turning 40 this year and plan on having a couple of the older ones colored in. My FH is so straight you would die - we are the Dharma and Greg couple so it is pretty hysterical that he is with someone like me but it works. I work for the govt so when people find out I have tattoos they are shocked. I think once kids are 18 and can pay for it themselves then they hey go for it. My son has been wanting a tattoo since he was 16 and I told him when he was 18 and he still wanted it and he could pay for it I would take him. Well he STILL wants the same tattoo but he is 22 and still hasn't done it!

smurfy1smile's picture

I got my one and only, so far, tat over a year ago. I was afraid my mom would flip so since then I have been wearing long pants, even in the hot summer, to her house. Its on the inside of my lower calf. I wore capris on Memorial Day to her house and she saw it and so did my brother. My brother made a comment and I teased him about his. He got his before he was 20 and still lived at home and my mom did not know until I "outed" him. Mom did not say anything, so I thought she did not notice, but I got an email about it which I ignored. I talked to her today and had to explain it.

My BS16 wanted one for his birthday but, lucky me, the law says 18. I have my ears pierced, 3 in the left and 2 in the right. My son has had his ear pierced since he was like 10. Both of my girls have their ears pierced too. I have mixed feelings about body piercing. They are not for me but I know people who have them and they look nice and others that they look stupid.

Self expression is a wonderful thing, most of the time.