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Pickle

FML's picture

I'm stuck in a pickle and I'm just not sure what to do. When FDH and I met we lived apart. It was hard because he works offshore. He is only home 6 days a month. I moved up to where he was because at the time my ex was becoming crazy and my DD8 and I needed a change of scenery and to start over. His parents were so encouraging and said they would support us however they could especially since FDH is gone so much and I know no one in town. Well of course slowly but surely it seems my FMIL is just out to get me. She loves his ex and literally tells all her grandkids that my FDH's and BMs son my SS5 is her favorite. She did the same thing with her kids and it seems she especially doesn't like girls. She sat me down about two weeks ago to let me know that she thought my DD8 is a spoiled brat and that no one can stand her. She says that her family members have said this and she said that even my family members have told her. My DD8 was sitting right there and heard this all.

My DD8 has gone through so much in the past year and was the victim of a horrible crime. She really has dealt with enough without this mess involved. The problem is although my child is a typical child, I honestly don't see her as spoiled. She listens. She is well-behaved and I constantly get compliments on her in public. She is stubborn. She likes to do things her way and sometimes bosses around her friends. The arguments FMIL had were ridiculous. She fights with SS5. That was pretty much it. She even recommended counseling for daughter on how to get along with others! :jawdrop: Another issue: Honestly, my SS5 is misbehaved. He is spoiled. He cries if he doesn't get his way and is constantly testing boundaries. But all FMIL sees is that he's an angel which is ridiculous. I am so embarrassed when I see her with him in public because he is all over the place and acting crazy.

We are stuck with this stupid trailer where we are. We are having financial problems like crazy. Did I mention the trailer was on FMIL's land? I try and stay away from her. But do I want to stay with someone who's family hates my kid? What about our future children? What if I have a girl that she can't stand either? What if it is a boy? So then my DD8 will have two siblings that FMIL loves and can't stand her. It wouldn't be so bad if she didn't adopt all the kids in the neighborhood as her grandkids. At church, all the kids love her and she loves them. Why is she outing my child?

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FML's picture

DtzyBlnd- FDH is totally supportive. He will go to hell in back to make sure that no one fucks with me. He has bitched out his mom so many times but it always comes back to bite us in the ass. She turns into something it's not and in the end: he's gone and I'm here and she makes my life a living hell. Half the time, it's not worth it for him to stand up for me. He loves my daughter like his own and these comments stabbed him through his heart. He talks to her less than I do. This is ridiculous. This is his mother. I can't help but feel guilty that I'm tearing the family apart and I should walk away...

FML's picture

I do have good relations with the rest of the family when she's not stirring shit. Everyone knows how FMIL is and her own daughter (female) moved literally all the way across the country mostly because she couldn't take her mom anymore. I am going to work on limiting her. It's just so sad bc SS5 is so damn attached to her and is constantly telling my daughter that it's his GMAW and not hers and just stupid shit. And I know she will start shit because of it. I just feel like I'm so stuck and I just wish something would give. It doesn't help that I'm away from family. I'm very family orientated and it just hurts me to not be in a place that I feel support for my family.

FML's picture

Thank you so much I appreciate your replies and sympathy. It does make it hard.