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My neice (slightly off topic)

Fade to black's picture

Wow. I just left a family Halloween party at my sister's house. Her husband has a job out  of state for months at a time. So its just me, my dh (who smartly left early), my 7 y/o son, my mom (widowed 6 years), my sister and her 2 kids nephew 15 and niece 9. (Other bioson 13 had elected to go to a Halloween carnival with a friend so he wasnt involved). Neice 9 has always been "the princess". Never could do no wrong. Everything bad that happened was someone elses fault. Could backtalk and throw fits in public, with no consequences.  It has got to the point where I dont go out with sis because of neice's actions.

Sis found out at the party that neice had 3 failing math assignments.  Shitstorm ensued with neice crying and screaming at her mom that she didnt understand math and it was the teachers fault. Sis is a teacher too and sees thru the bs, and comes down on neice that she better get it together or else she will lose her phone, Youtube, Fortnite,  etc for the foreseeable future. Neice proceeds to have a nuclear meltdown. 

I in my noninfinite wisdom tell neice I will pay her 20 dollars if she can complete correctly the rest of her assignment.  I had pointed my finger down at her numbers to tell her how to do an inverse problem, and she slapped my hand away and my hand hit my 7 year old in the face. I sternly told her do not do that again, and she growled (???) at me. Her brother told her to stop it and listen, and she screamed at him. My mom had enough and told her off, to which neice shreiked and ran off. ( Sis had decided to be in the shower during all this) and neice ran out the door outside  in 47 degree weather. (No offense to my northern friends, I realize this isnt cold cold but to us Texans this is COLD lol) 

Neice then came back and finished her math problems correctly and snottily asked for her 20 dollars. I told her I didn't have it on me but I would get it when I went to the bank. She then proceeded to have another screaming fit and ran outside. By this time my mom had had enough. She yelled at neice to apologize and neice kept screaming "what freaking for?? What freaking for??" I got my kids things together to leave, sis was still in the shower, and mom was foaming at the mouth from the disrespect neice kept showing.  

We left and mom was saying she was never going to another Halloween party at sis's house again, she would rather stay home alone. That neice was in for a rough time at school with her attitude and that she (mom) was done.

I realize now I should have never attempted to help in any way, niece doesn't appreciate it, its not worth it, I need to heed the stepmom mantra "not my kid not my problem ". Painful lesson learned. To quote NotUrMom I need to focus on my real kids.

Jesus Christ, you can never truly get away from it, no matter skid family or bio family.

 

Comments

DHsfamilyfromhell's picture

It was very kind of you to the offer the help. I am not a fan of my own nieces behaviour. She is ‘entitled’ to everything she wants and gets it because my sister gives in to huge tantrums. 

It must have been awful for you. 

Have this nine years tantrums turned into hormonal mood swings I wonder. Not that it matters, she shouldn’t behave like that. 

At least your mother can see your point of view and it’s not going to cause division between you both.

Fade to black's picture

I hadnt thought about that honestly. It could very well be. She has always been catered to, and hormones will definitely up the ante. Mom always says "wait until she is a teenager ", and she is right. 

Thank you for your kind words! 

tog redux's picture

At what sort of Halloween party do you do homework and take showers?   Blum 3

My SS was like this about homework. It was absolutely infuriating.  I did my level best to stay out of it. At BM's he'd get despondent and weepy and with DH he'd just get pouty and passive-aggressive.  Eventually he stopped coming over and once with BM 24/7, he stopped doing homework entirely too.  They put him in a program for troubled kids and nursed him through high school.  He graduated barely and now he's 19, living with BM and doing nothing but sleeping and gaming.

Anyway, it's a hard behavior to watch, but it's your sister's fault (partially) and she has to fix it.

Fade to black's picture

I know right? Definitely not a party, just a family thing. Being a school night neice had homework which was another point of contention since neice was supposed to have done it earlier but played around on her phone instead and sis was mad about that.  And sis has always been the type of whenever she is done/pissed at something she will leave us there and go to her room to read a book, shower, etc.

My own little dysfunction junction family, lol!

thinkthrice's picture

Has mom thought about calling an exorcist?

Fade to black's picture

It was a legit growl. I probably should have thrown some Holy Water on her, hehehe!! 

beebeel's picture

I would have yanked my naked sis out of the shower and told her to start parenting her feral beast. But I grew up with brothers so maybe that made me more aggressive lol.

Fade to black's picture

...imagining me doing this! Priceless!! *lol*

Fade to black's picture

I have had this very same thought too!