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Petty vent

Fade to black's picture

Hear ye, hear ye! Dh got a call from sd17 today about a crisis she needed his help solving. The crisis? She is 2 months behind in her sorority membership dues, and the sorority is threatening to send her info to collections. (First world prob extraordinaire)

This is so absurd. Either figure out a way to pay the dues, or drop out and pay what you owe. She says the sorority increased the dues and she wasnt aware, so its not her fault (TM). Just like when she wrecked her car, it wasnt her fault (TM). She called another time because she was failing a major course, though not her fault, it was the mean professor (Modified TM).  She called to whine another time that she had to work Tgiving even though she had taken a week off prior for finals, her mean boss had her work Tgiving (another modified TM).

So back to the sorority saga, Dh told her of some options,  then trotted out the winner option: say, the sorority contract cant be enforced if she is only 17?

For some reason, that just hit me wrong. So its ok to be an adult like attend college, join a sorority and take advantage of the sorority benefits, but when the chips are down and its time to problem solve as an adult, now we can revert back to minorhood and make it all go away. I would bet $ sd told the sorority she was 18. Honesty was never her strong suit. She isnt above lying to get what she wants. 

Oh well, this was my petty rant for the day, lol! Happy New Year to all Stalkers! 




notasm3's picture

When I could not afford my sorority dues my last year of school I went inactive.  No one held that against me.  But I did it proactively - not after it was long overdue.

notsobad's picture

This is a ploy that BM has mastered.

Oh, poor poor me. How ever will I pay this bill? If only there were some loving helpful soul out there who could help me out and come to my rescue. (Back of wrist planted firmly on forehead, head slightly tilted back, eyelashes fluttering)

I'm surprised your DH didn't send her an etransfer immediately!

BM actually called DH to tell him that her tires were very worn out. She'd love to come to visit her ailing parents and SD but she was so worried that her tires might not make it through the mountain roads. Le Sigh.

He didn't say anything, just crickets in the background, she quickly got the point but seriously! You are 55 years old, and have not been with this man for over 15 years, stop thinking that he is going to help you with anything!

As soon as he hung up he asked me to block her number, which I promptly did. He said if there is an emergency he'd rather hear about it from the police than from her.

Oh and either the tires weren't that bad or she found someone else to take pity on her because she's been out here 3 times since that phone call. SD feels the need to annouce every time BM is here.

Fade to black's picture

I hear ya! I think the only reason DH didnt do an immediate etransfer (yet...) is that a sorority is not what he wanted her to spend her money on, but since she never listened to him we are. He wanted her to focus on her studies her first year, and get acclimated to college life and self motivation,  and maybe revisit sorority life next year. But no. 

Its truly funny, though. We had sd from age 11 to 16, and she didnt want to have anything to do with dh or his fatherly advice. She wanted to be with BM, and as soon as BM left her own DH for her internet boyfriend, she called and sd went running. 250 miles away .

But now sd calls dh for advice (not that she takes it, she argues with him about why his advice wont work).  And her BM has squat to do with her. So I am sure he shoots her a moneygram here and there, to "prove himself" to sd that he is better than BM. Or something. 

I try and stay out of it,  as long as it doesn't affect my finances/life. But his comment about the contract not being enforceable really diminished him in my eyes.


shamds's picture

to guilt trip dad that she and bio mum are incurring the financial costs of younger sd13 despite mum being married to a man almost 10 yrs, despite hubby paying money to sd22 as she was in uni as an allowance to cover food costs and textbooks etc, pays money as per court order for sd13, however exwife still thinks hubby is 100% responsible for the kids and she puts nothing in to contribute financially to the girls. She hasn’t contributed to the girls in years according to sd22. So why hasn’t sd22 been asked directly well if your mum is incurring the costs to care for sd13 who hasn’t been living with her in years but sd22 had been caring for sd13, why have these kids not asked biomum why she never contributes anything? Oh yup because they’re absolutely stupid and don’t understand half of the crap that comes out of their mouth.

hubby doesn’t realise that if sd13 hasn’t been in bio mums care or residing with her for past 2-3 yrs, she never should have been getting child support. Sd22 only recently told hubby this...

thats crazy blended life for you!!

Harry's picture

If she is going what she wants maybe she should either drop out, or get a job to pay for it.  Unless of course DH likes being an ATM. Where she only goes to him for money. Who paying for college ?  How is this ATMing not going to effect your financial life.  It’s only going to get worst as she gets older 

ESMOD's picture

I know that some schools won't even let you rush until  your 2nd semester.. because they want the kids to get used to school and concentrate on THAT before they get all into the social stuff of a sorority.. which IS a fairly big time commitment.