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Teenage Step granddtrs

dollydee's picture

I have 3 SGDs aged 20,18 and 15 vacationing with me for a week. The other day I shared some of my business problems with them. They were so upset and said it causes them depression... and how dare i speak such things in front of a 14 y.o. I immediately apologised. My husb chastised me in front of them for discussing our problems with them. They hardly speak with me now and i am very sad.


MoominMama's picture

Looks like you have snowflakes for step kids and a disney dad husband. How dare he 'chastise' you in front of them.. Also there's no need for them to be cold shouldering you after you apologised. They sound like a bunch of ass****'s imo. 

Nomad7's picture

Sad to hear this. It is important for young people to be aware of the ups and downs of life. These aren’t even young children who need to be sheltered they are young adults. It was disrespectful of your husband to talk to you this way in front of them. If he did have an issue he should have spoken to you in private about it. Sorry to hear this happened. 

Curious Georgetta's picture

Was inappropriate for you to have said whatever to the granddaughters. You think it was inappropriate for him to have spoken that way to you in front of the granddaughters.

Perhaps the issue is failure to identify what is the acceptable standard for communication in your particular household.  You seem to think that he violated some universal standard in res husband/wife communication and obviously he thought that you committed a serious faux pad that needed to be corrected on the spot.


I think that you are both overreacting. The young woman may be had no need or desire to be privy to the status of your business but they are in no way damaged by the information - in spite of their somewhat theatrical tespomse.  And while your husband might have privately pulled you aside to express his disagreement with you, you are not damaged because some adults and almost adults heard him express his disagreement. Do you really think that kids, even very young kids, think that parents/grandparents do not have disagreements?

The event happened and you all survived to live another day and likely have another disagreement.

You should let it go. If you are having serious business isdues, you have far more important issues to occupy your thoughts. If your husband is thoughtful and helpful with your business problems, that is a far more significant indicate of his regard and respect for you than the event that took place with the granddaughters.

Life is too short to spend it dwelling on the small things  when the big issues are there to confront us.

Hopefully, things with your business will be resolved to your satisfaction.

Areyou's picture

Sorry that happened. It must feel shitty. It’s hard when your own spouse doesn’t support you. And it’s hard when you have bratty stepgranddaughters that you have to go out of your way for and they aren’t mature enough to show empathy for you. Sucks big time. Big hugs to you dear. Take care.

Iamwoman's picture

If they were so traumatized, then why did they listen? Did you strap them into chairs and force them to hear you out??

Skids = dramatic, DH = enabler of drama

ESMOD's picture

I guess without knowing what was shared it's tough to know whether it was or was not really appropriate to talk about with these grandkids.  I know they are teens/adults.. but sometimes sharing our burdens with others is just shifting worry and honestly  maybe they weren't the right audience.  (this site might have been a good OT blog space to vent). 

Now, it's not nice for your husband to chastise you in front of the kids either.. sounds like you both faux pas'ed a bit.